適合高一的英文幽默故事

1、一個(gè)女生前一天晚上得到男朋友的訂婚戒指,但竟沒有一個(gè)同學(xué)注意到,令她忿忿不平.到下午大家坐著談天的時(shí)候,她突然站起來大聲說：“哎呀,這里真熱呀,我看我還是把戒指脫下來吧.”1.thenightbefore,agirlgetboyfriendengagementring,butnoonenoticedtheclassmate,makeherantics.Yousitandchatintheafternoon,shesuddenlystoodupandshouted:\"oh,it'sreallyhotinhere,IthinkI'dbettertakeoffyourring.2、女主人把女傭叫到面前問她：“你是否懷孕了?”“是啊!”女傭回道.“虧你還說得出口,你還沒有結(jié)婚,難道不覺得害羞嗎?”女主人再次訓(xùn).“我為什么要害羞,女主人你自己不也懷孕了嗎?”“可是我懷的是我丈夫的!”女主人生氣地反駁.“我也是啊!”女傭高興地附和.2,themistresscalledthemaidtoaskher:\"areyoupregnant?\"\"Yes!\"Themaidanswered.Export\"kuiyoustillsay,youarenotmarried,don'tyoufeelshy?\"Thehostesstrainingagain.\"WhyshouldIbeshy,youdon'tthehostessalsopregnant?\"\"ButIconceiveismyhusband!\"Thehostessretortedangrily.\"Metoo!\"Themaidhappytoecho.3、一個(gè)人騎摩托車喜歡反穿衣服,就是把口子在后面扣上,可以擋風(fēng).一天他酒后駕駛,翻了,一頭栽在路旁.警察趕到：警察甲：好嚴(yán)重的車禍.警察乙：是啊,腦袋都撞到后面去了.警察甲：嗯,還有呼吸,我們幫他把頭轉(zhuǎn)回來吧.警察乙：好.一、二使勁,轉(zhuǎn)回來了.警察甲：嗯,沒有呼吸了.3,amanridingamotorcyclelikethedress,istocutontheback,canthewind.Drunkdrivingoneday,heturnedover,aplantedontheroad.Police:policea:agoodseriouscaraccident.Policemanb:yes,hisheadhittheback.Po1:well,stillbreathing,let'shelphimturnhisheadback.Po2:good...One,two,turnback.Policemana:well,notbreathing...4、在一條七拐八拐的鄉(xiāng)村公路上,因?yàn)闀r(shí)常發(fā)生車禍,所以常常有一些鬼故事發(fā)生,有一天晚上,有一個(gè)出租車司機(jī)看見路邊有一個(gè)長(zhǎng)發(fā)披肩,身著白衣的女人向他招手,因?yàn)檫@個(gè)司機(jī)沒有見過鬼,所以大膽的停下來讓她上車了,這一路上,司機(jī)雖然不信有鬼,心里也毛毛的,所以時(shí)常從后視鏡看后面的女人,開著開著,突然司機(jī)發(fā)現(xiàn)那個(gè)女人不見了!司機(jī)嚇了一大跳,趕緊踩了一個(gè)剎車!只見那個(gè)女人滿臉是血,表情猙獰.司機(jī)嚇的牙直打顫.突然那女人開口了：“你會(huì)不會(huì)開車啊!我低頭系個(gè)鞋帶你突然一剎車我把鼻子都撞破了……”4,turninacurvycountryroad,becauseofteninacaraccident,sooftenhavesomeghoststory,onenight,there'sataxidriversawthesideoftheroadhavealonghairshawls,dressedinawhitewomanwavedtohim,becausethedriverdidn'tseeaghost,soboldstoppedtolethergetonthebus,alongtheway,thedriverdoesn'tbelieveinghosts,theinthemind10、牧師對(duì)買了他馬和馬車的農(nóng)夫說：“這匹馬只能聽懂教會(huì)的語(yǔ)言,叫"感謝上帝"它就跑;叫"贊美上帝"它才停下.”農(nóng)夫?qū)⑿艑⒁?他試著喊了一聲感謝上帝,那匹馬立刻飛奔起來,越跑越快.一只跑到懸崖邊上驚恐的農(nóng)夫才想起讓它停下來的口令“贊美上帝”.果然,馬停下來了.死里逃生的農(nóng)夫長(zhǎng)出一口氣：“感謝上帝………”

10,prieststobuyhishorseandcarriageofthefarmersaid,\"thishorsecanonlyunderstandthelanguageofthechurch,call\"thankgod\"itran;called\"praisegod\"itdidn'tstop.\"Farmertrack,hetriedtothankgodgaveacry,thehorsegallop,immediatelyranfasterandfaster.Aruntotheedgeoftheclifffrightenedfarmerr