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段落的寫作主題句擴(kuò)展句擴(kuò)展句擴(kuò)展句段落結(jié)構(gòu)圖Inthisworld,weshouldthinkmoreofotherpeoplethanofourselves.Bysodoing,ourworldwillbefullofhappiness.This,ofcourse,ismypersonalview.ButitisalessonIhavedrawnfromoneofmyownexperience.Sonow,Iwouldliketosharethatexperiencewithyou,mydearreader.美國(guó)編者認(rèn)為:Thisisessentiallyasolid(不錯(cuò)的)
essay.Thewriterusesananecdote(軼事)
tomakeapoint…Nowwejustneedtogiveitagood,strongtopicsentenceusingthewriter’sownideastoformit.美國(guó)編者給這個(gè)開頭段擬了下面的主題句:
Alittlegirltaughtmeanimportantlessonabouttheimportanceofthinkingmoreofotherpeoplethanofourselves.OnedayItookaverycrowdedbustoschool…中國(guó)學(xué)生作文批改Inmychildhood,thereweresomanythingsthatwereworthcallingtomind.Somemademehappy,somemademeexcited,andsomemademesad.Butamongthemwasanunforgettablething,whenIthinkofit,mygoodfriendTongTongwilloccurtome.美國(guó)編者認(rèn)為:Thisisamovingstoryaboutfriendswhohavequarreled.Itneedsagoodtopicsentencetobringthereaderintothefeelingsthewriterwantstoconvey(傳達(dá)).美國(guó)編者給這個(gè)開頭段擬了下面的主題句:
OneofthemostunforgettableexperienceofmychildhoodinvolvesmygoodfriendTongTong.IthappenedwhenIwaseightyearsold…..中國(guó)學(xué)生作文批改DifferentPositionsOfaTopicSentencetypeThepositionsofthe
topicsentence
AtthebeginningofaparagraphAttheendofaparagraphInthemiddleofaparagraphNocleartopicsentence1
Smokingcigarettesisharmfultoyourhealth.Experimentsshowthatcigarettesmokingcancausecancer.Besidesthemostseriousandterribledisease(illness)----cancer,cigarettesmokingcanalsocauseotherhealthproblems.Forexample,itcangiveonea“smoker’scough”.Finally,studieshaveshownitiseasyforcigarettesmokerstocatchcolds.Whetheryougetanunimportantcoldorterriblekiller,cancer,smokingisharmful.Isitworthit?主題句的位置
主題句在段首JaneandKarenhavemanythingsincommon.
Tobeginwith,bothgirlshavethesamebackground.JanewasbornandraisedintheWest,andsowasKaren.Next,bothgirlsareinterestedinthesamekindsofsubjectsinschool.JanelikesFrench,history,andEnglish.Inthesameway,KarenlikesSpanish,historyandEnglish.Furthermore,bothgirlswanttobeteachers.Janeplanstobecomeanelementaryschoolteacher.ButKarenwantstobeahighschoolteacher.Asyoucansee,thetwogirlsarealmostliketwins.2
Oftennoonelooksmoreguiltythantheinnocent.Ontheotherhand,nobodymaylookmoreinnocentthanaprofessionalcriminal.Andthemanwhoknows“everything”mayreallyonlybetryingtohidehisownweakness.So,itisfoolishtotrytojudgeapersononlybyhisappearance.主題句在段落結(jié)尾
AmericansmightbeembarrassedbecausetheirJapanesefriendsaresoformalwiththem.JapanesemightfeelinsultedbecauseAmericanacquaintances(熟人、朋友)greetthemcasually.Still,theformsofgreetinginbothcountriesonlyshowrespectforothers.
ItjusthappensthatAmericansandJapanesehaveadifferentwayoflookingathumanrelationshipsandthushaveadifferentwayshowingrespect.
3
Everybridewantsherweddingtobethemostwonderfuldayofherlife.Butperfectweddingsrequirecarefulplanning,whetherthebrideandbridegroomareplanningatraditionalweddingorjustaregistryofficeceremony.Payingforthewedding,whichisalwaysaproblem,willpartlydecidethechoice.
TomstudiedforfouryearsattheUniversityofParisanddecidedtoleavebeforehisgraduation.HetransferredtotheUniversityofBerlinandgraduatedwithhonors.HarvardLawSchooland,later,BostonCollegeprovidedhimwithanexcellentlegalbackground.HeispresentlyacorporationlawyerinMiami,Florida.
Themainideaofthisparagraphisthat______.
A.Tom,whohadstudiedatParisUniversitiesfor
fouryears,movedtoanotheruniversity.
B.Tombecamealawyersincehisgraduationfrom
HarvardLawSchoolandlaterfromBoston
College.
C.Tomwasanexcellentstudentwhenhestudiedat
Berlinuniversity.
D.Tomreceivedanexcellenteducation.detaildetaildetail《中國(guó)大學(xué)生作文評(píng)改》的中國(guó)作者毛榮貴說:“筆者曾就美版的Reader’sDigest和Time兩本期刊的100篇短文做過調(diào)查,發(fā)現(xiàn)其中僅有2篇其topicsentence較為模糊,而有68篇的topicsentence均被置于文/段首,其余30篇已經(jīng)將段落的topicsentence升格為小標(biāo)題?!盬riteatopicsentenceforthefollowingsupportingideas.IthascreatedMs.,atitleforwomencomparabletoMr.formen.TheMovementhaschangedtheendingofseveralcompoundwordsfrom–manto–person.TheMovementisresponsibleforsomenewterms.TheMovementhashadaneffectonthethird-personsingularpronoun.TheWomen’sMovement_________________________________________.hashadseveraleffectsontheEnglishlanguageStudentsonthiscampus________________________________recentlyvoicedseveralcomplaints.Theyvoiceddissatisfactionwiththecampuslighting.Theyexpressedtheirdisgustwiththefoodsoldbythedining-hall.Theyprotestedthegradingpoliciesoftheinstructors.Readthefollowingparagraphscarefullyandwriteatopicsentenceforeachparagraphinthespaceprovided.
.FamousinventorThomasEdison,forinstance,didsopoorlyinhisfirstyearsofschoolthathisteacherwarnedhisparentsthathewouldneverbeasuccessatanything.Similarly,HenryFord,thefatheroftheautoindustry,hadtroubleinschoolwithbothreadingandwriting.ButperhapsthebestexampleisAlbertEinstein,whoseparentsandteacherssuspectedthathewasretardedbecauseherespondedtoquestionssoslowlyandinastutteringvoice.Einstein’shighschoolrecordwaspoorineverythingbutmath,andhefailedhiscollegeentranceexamsthefirsttime.Evenoutofschoolthemanhadtroubleholdingajob---untilheannouncedthetheoryofrelativity.ManyscientistshadverybadproficiencyrecordsintheirschooldaysAsanindustry,TVprovidesjobsforhundredsofthousandswhomakeTVsetsandbroadcastingequipment.Italsoprovidesworkforactors,technicians,andotherswhoputonprograms.Asanart,televisionbringsthetheaterandotherculturaleventsintothehome.ItsinfluenceonthelifeofaverageAmericansisincalculable:itcaninfluencetheirthoughts,theirlikesanddislikes,theirspeech,andeventheirdress.Itcanalsoaddtotheirstoreofknowledge.Throughadvertising,televisionhelpsbusinessesandmanufacturersselltheirproductstomillionsofpeople.Televisionhasbroughtpoliticalcampaignsclosertothevotersthaninformerdays.EducationalTVstationsofferteachinginvarioussubjectsrangingfromhomenursingtoartappreciation.Manylargeschoolsanduniversitieshave“closed-circuit”televisionequipmentthatwilltelecastlecturesanddemonstrationstohundredsofstudentsindifferentclassrooms;andthelecturecanbeputonvideotapetobekeptforlateruse.SomehospitalsuseTVtoallowmedicalstudentstogetclose-upviewsofoperations.TVplaysanimportantroleinourdailylife.Americansrelaxingathome,forexample,mayputonkimonos,whichisaJapaneseword.AmericanswholiveinawarmclimatemaytakeanafternoonsiestaonanoutdoorpatiowithoutevenrealizingthattheseareSpanishwords.Intheirgardens,theymayenjoythefragranceofjasmineflowers,awordthatcameintoEnglishfromPersian.Theymayevenrelaxonachalse
longuewhilesippingadrinkwithvodka,wordsofFrenchandRussianorigin,respectively.ManyloanwordshaveenteredAmericans’dailylife.Weareawakenedbyelectricalarmclocksandmusicpouringfromourradio;weoperateourtoaster,brushourteethwithanelectrictoothbrush,andshavewithanelectricrazor.Wereadtheday’sheadlinesfromnewspapersprintedonhugeelectricpresses,andwewritealetteronourelectrictypewriterbeforeleavingforworktooperateacomputerandwordprocessor.Electricityhasfilledalmosteverypartofourlife.________________________________.Forexampleteacherslivebysellingknowledge,philosophersbysellingwisdomandpriestsbysellingspiritualcomfort.Thoughitmaybepossibletomeasurethevalueofmaterialgoodsintermsofmoney,itisverydifficulttocalculatethetruevalueofserviceswhichpeopleperformforus.Theconditionsofsocietyaresuchthatbillshavetobepaidforinthesamewaythatgoodsarepaidforatshop.Everyonehassomethingtosell.Everyonelivesbysellingsomething.____________________________________________.BeforeenteringahouseinJapan,itisagoodmannertotakeoffyourshoes.InEuropeancountrieseventhoughshoessometimesbecomeverymuddy,thisisnotdone.AguestinaChinesehouseneverfinishesadrink.Heleavesalittletoshowthathehashadenough.InaMalaysianhouse,too,aguestleavesalittlefood.InEngland,aguestalwaysfinishesadrinktoshowthathehasenjoyedit.Itseemsthatmannersindifferentcountriesareneverthesame.Differentcountriesanddifferentraceshavedifferentmanners._____________________________________.Firecanheatwater,cook,giveoutlightandkeepyourhousewarm.Sometimes,however,bigfirescanburndownhousesandforests.Forexample,thebigfirecausedbyYuanmingPalace,afamouspalaceinQingDynasty,ruinedcompletely.Sowemustbeverycarefulwithmatches,burningcigarettes,faultyelectricappliancesorunquenched(未撲滅的)fires
Becarefulwithfirebecauseitdoesnotalwaysdousgood.例文:Millionsofyearsago,AustraliawaslinkedtoAsiabyalandbridge.Thenanearthquakecausedthelandbridgetosink.Thesearushedin,andAustraliabecameanisland.Later,thisislandbecameaBritishcolony.ManyanimalsthatoncewanderedbackandforthacrossthelandbridgewereleftinAustralia.Andkangarooswereamongthem.Thoughtheywerekilledoffbylargeanimalsinotherplaces,theywereabouttosurviveinAustralia.這一段講的是遠(yuǎn)古時(shí)期的澳大利亞,當(dāng)時(shí)連人類都沒有,但然不必提它后來(lái)淪為英國(guó)的殖民地的事了。此句應(yīng)刪掉。
InmyEnglishstudy,Ihavemanydifficulties.Myfirstdifficultyisthatmyvocabularyisnotlarge.TheseconddifficultyIhaveisthatIcannotwritewell.Thethirddifficultyisthatmylisteningcomprehensionisnotgoodenough.NowIhaveaplantostudyEnglishwell.主題句:Ihavemanydifficulties.
發(fā)展句:具體說明困難Myfirstdifficulty…;Theseconddifficulty…;Thethirddifficulty….結(jié)尾句:NowIhaveaplan…篇章結(jié)構(gòu):示范段落①Untilrecentlydaydreamingwasviewedasawasteoftime.②Oritwasconsideredanunhealthyescapefromreallifeanditsduties.③Butnowsomepeoplearetakingafreshlookatdaydreaming.④Anditmaybethatmorepeoplearesufferingfromalackofdaydreamingthanaresufferingfromtoomuchofit.連接詞連接詞連接詞連接詞示范段落①Untilrecentlydaydreamingwasviewedasawasteoftime.②Oritwasconsideredasunhealthyescapefromreallifeanditsduties.③Butnowsomepeoplearetakingafreshlookatdaydreaming.④Anditmaybethatmorepeoplearesufferingfromalackofdaydreamingthanaresufferingfromtoomuchofit.代詞代詞代詞示范段落①Untilrecentlydaydreamingwasviewedasawasteoftime.②Oritwasconsideredasunhealthyescapefromreallifeanditsduties.③Butnowsomepeoplearetakingafreshlookatdaydreaming.④Andit
maybethatmorepeoplearesufferingfromalackofdaydreamingthanaresufferingfromtoomuchofit.重復(fù)關(guān)鍵詞重復(fù)關(guān)鍵詞重復(fù)關(guān)鍵詞開始陳述tobeginwith,tostartwith,let’sbeginwith,firstofall,inthefirstplace,aboveall,atfirst1.Ithoughttodaywasgoingtobereallybad.Tostartwith,itwasraining,andrainydaysmakemesad.2.Idon’tagreethatanimalsshouldliveinthezoo.Tobeginwith,/Firstofall…theyhavenofreedom…3.
Atfirst,Ithoughtitmightbeadog,butIcan’tseeadog.4.Ithoughttodaywasgoingtobereallybad.Tostartwith,itwasraining,andrainydaysmakemesad.如何做到行文連貫?其中的一個(gè)技巧就是恰當(dāng)使用連結(jié)詞。只有恰當(dāng)使用了語(yǔ)句之間的連接成分,才能使全文結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊。順序列點(diǎn)/顯示事件的先后順序firstly/secondly/thirdly;first/second/third,then,next,afterthis,afterthat,beforethis,beforethateg.1.FirstIneedyournameandaddress.Second,when’syourbirthday?2.Heevenhandedoutadvertisementsatalocalsupermarket.Thenhetoldtheteachersatschoolaboutthisproblem.3.At8o’clockIhavemath.Idon’tlikemath.Thenat9:00Ihavescience.Next,at10:00,Ihavehistory.4.Afterthat,theywenttotheOutdoorPoolwheretherewasagiantoctopus.表示“另外,還有”what’smore,besides,also,inaddition,still,aswellasNo,Ican’thaveanypetsbecausemymotherhatesthem.Besides,outapartmentistoosmall.Also,pigsneedalotoflove.Still,it’sagreatplacetovisitI’mluckytobehereformysix-monthEnglishcourse.Predictingthefuturecanbedifficultaswellasembarrassing.結(jié)束陳述
finally,lastly,intheend1.
Firstcutupthreebananas,threeapp
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