下載本文檔
版權(quán)說明:本文檔由用戶提供并上傳,收益歸屬內(nèi)容提供方,若內(nèi)容存在侵權(quán),請進(jìn)行舉報或認(rèn)領(lǐng)
文檔簡介
閱讀下面短文,根據(jù)所給情節(jié)進(jìn)行續(xù)寫,使之構(gòu)成一個完整的故事Themostdelightfulandunusualthing[paidforinthelastsummerwasapairofducklings.OnedayIspottedafriend'sphotooftwotinygoldenducklingsinherlivingroom.Imessagedherimmediately.Shewasfostering(照#)thebabyducksforafarm.Asthefarmexplainsonitswebsite,youcanadoptthenewbornsandparentthemuntiltheygrowintotheir“adulthood”whenyoucouldchoosetokeepthemortakethemback.For$165,thefarmwouldbringuseverythingweneededtofosterducklingsandalsoanactivityforLeo.Thisprogramwouldprovideuswithwhatwe'dbeenlacking:joyandfellowship.“We'regettingducklings!”Iproudlyannounced.About10dayslater,amanfromthefarmarrivedatourhomeandhandedoverashoeboxhousingapairofbabyducks.LeoandIheldtheminourhands,eachoneatiny,almostweightlessparcelofsilkygold.Leoimmediatelycasthimselfastheirfather,andtheducklingsacceptedtherolehappilywaddling(搖擺)athisfeetandslippingonourhardwoodfloors.Leokissedthemontheirbeaks(喙)andtheybithislipslightly,whichheconcludedmeanttheylovedhim.Afterafewweeks,theducklingstripledinsize,andthefairytaletookaturn.Muchaswelovedthem,itwastimetomakethechoice.Theywereabouttoenteradulthood,anditwasgettinginconvenienttokeepthemanylonger.ltwasonlythenthatIrealizedIdidn'tknowwhatwouldhappentothembackatthefarm.Icalledthefarm,andIwastoldthatactuallyourducklingswouldlikelyserveaswonderfulsupper.”注意:1.所續(xù)寫短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右:2.續(xù)寫部分分為兩段,每段的開頭語已為你寫好Paragraph1.Now,wecouldn'tkeepthem,butwealsocouldn'ttakethemback.Paragraph2:IwaslosinghopewhenIreceivedanemailfromawomanwholivedonahobbyfarm.原文大意:
我看到朋友分享的在家養(yǎng)小鴨子的可愛照片,也想通過鴨子寵物收獲開心和友誼,于是聯(lián)系農(nóng)場領(lǐng)養(yǎng)了兩只剛出生ducklings,農(nóng)場承諾等小鴨長大你可以選擇繼續(xù)養(yǎng)或者送回農(nóng)場。我和Leo都很喜歡這兩個小家伙,可隨著他們的長大,我們已經(jīng)不方便再繼續(xù)養(yǎng)下去,于是詢問農(nóng)場送回之后鴨子會怎樣被對待?得知鴨子會成為盤中餐。。。接下來,要我們續(xù)寫??蚣芊治觯?/p>
根據(jù)第一段的首句Now,wecouldn’tkeepthem,butwealsocouldn’ttakethemback.可知,情感是糾結(jié)的兩難的。那該怎么解決呢?所以接下來寫how.再看第二段給的首句IwaslosinghopewhenIreceivedanemailfromawomanwholivedonahobbyfarm.中的關(guān)鍵詞“anemail”,倒推出第一段中的解決辦法應(yīng)該是網(wǎng)上求助(或發(fā)帖或論壇或發(fā)郵件等方式)。第二段后面續(xù)寫內(nèi)容就自然是發(fā)郵件來的這位女性收養(yǎng)我們的鴨子,我們把鴨子送去她的農(nóng)場。細(xì)節(jié)分析:
三個銜接處分析完,框架也就出來了,再來看細(xì)節(jié)和伏筆。細(xì)節(jié)一:第二段給出的首句中waslosinghope這一細(xì)節(jié)暗示第一段結(jié)尾處的解決辦法應(yīng)該并非很順利,所以我第一段結(jié)尾處寫的是:Aweekpassed,andtherewasnomoreresponse.這樣和第二段首句waslosinghope這一細(xì)節(jié)銜接更緊湊。細(xì)節(jié)二:我也再次利用第二段首句losehope這一詞,在第一段網(wǎng)上求助時寫到
Withthehopethatitwouldwork,Iposted...,這樣兩處的hope形成呼應(yīng)。細(xì)節(jié)三:第二段首句中的hobbyfarm,是和其他農(nóng)場不一樣的。農(nóng)場主應(yīng)該是動物愛好者(范文寫的是素食主義者),不會讓鴨子成為盤中餐。于是,第二段我描寫了這個農(nóng)場里動物生活舒適和諧的畫面,“我”放心把鴨子交給了她。細(xì)節(jié)四:最后結(jié)尾再看看有沒有主題可以升華?;氐皆牡谝欢谓Y(jié)尾句提到我們養(yǎng)鴨子是期望收獲我們?nèi)狈Φ膉oyandfellowship,我把這個定位為主題,想在續(xù)寫結(jié)尾重復(fù)升華下,于是第二段我寫到hobby農(nóng)場主讓我們隨時可以回來看望鴨子。我的結(jié)尾Infact,joyandfellowshipcanstaywithusforever.也就自然點(diǎn)題了。下水文:Now,wecouldn'tkeepthem,butwealsocouldn'ttakethemback.Trappedinsuchadilemma,IfeltatalosswhatIshoulddo.ThenLeosuggested,“Whynotturntothesocialmediaforhelp?”Withthehopethatitwouldwork,Ipostedonlinephotosofmyducklingsanddesiredtofindsomeonewillingtofosterthem.Itturnedoutthatmypostdidreceiveseveralviewersandcomments,onlyshowingaffectionforourlovelyducksbuttheycouldn'tkeepthemeither.Aweekpassed,andtherewasnomoreresponse.IwaslosinghopewhenIreceivedanemailfromawomanwholivedonahobbyfarm.“l(fā)amananimalloveranditisconvenientformetoadoptthemonmyfarmandyoucandropinonthemwheneveryouwant.”Withasurgeofexcitementsweepingoverme,ItogetherwithLeotookalongourduckstoherfarm.ThewomannamedMarygaveusawarmwelcomeandshowedusaroundherfarm,hometovariouslivestock,livingfreelyandharmoniouslytogether.Aswesaidgoodbye.wecouldn'twaittoseeeachothernexttime.Infact,joyandfellowshipcanstaywithusforever.附:參考范文No,wecouldn'thelpthem,butitalsocouldn'ttakethemback.Whatadilemma!Allthistime,wehadbeenfosteringthemoutoflove,hadn'twe?Orhadwebeenfatteningthemforafancymealindeed?NeverdidIimaginethatthejoyandfellowshipwehadwouldcometoabrutalbreakup.Plus,Ididn'thavethehearttotellLeotoacceptsuchamiserablefateforhisbelovedducklings.Dreadfullyguilty,Ilaunchedasortofduckadoptionagency,desperatelyemailingandcallinganimalsheltersinthehopeoffindingthemasafehome.IaslosinghopethenIreceivedanemailfromawomanwholivedonahobbyfarm.Shewaslookingformoreducks,andshewasvegetarian,whichmadeheraperfectcandidate.Wecarefullypackedeverythingforourducksbeforeheadingtotheirnewhome.Asweenteredthehobbyfarm,Ifeltasifwehadslippedintoafairytale:bunnieshoppingaroundsunlitgrass,miniaturehorsestrottingontherichpasture,andgrown-upduckswanderingaboutwiththeirwhichfeathersdancingagainstsummerclouds.Reluctantandrejoicedatthesametime,weleftoutducksforthisdreamhouse.反思:下水文和范文的對比學(xué)習(xí)拜讀了范文,框架和思路和范文大致相同,說明下水文分析方向是沒有錯的。這篇下
溫馨提示
- 1. 本站所有資源如無特殊說明,都需要本地電腦安裝OFFICE2007和PDF閱讀器。圖紙軟件為CAD,CAXA,PROE,UG,SolidWorks等.壓縮文件請下載最新的WinRAR軟件解壓。
- 2. 本站的文檔不包含任何第三方提供的附件圖紙等,如果需要附件,請聯(lián)系上傳者。文件的所有權(quán)益歸上傳用戶所有。
- 3. 本站RAR壓縮包中若帶圖紙,網(wǎng)頁內(nèi)容里面會有圖紙預(yù)覽,若沒有圖紙預(yù)覽就沒有圖紙。
- 4. 未經(jīng)權(quán)益所有人同意不得將文件中的內(nèi)容挪作商業(yè)或盈利用途。
- 5. 人人文庫網(wǎng)僅提供信息存儲空間,僅對用戶上傳內(nèi)容的表現(xiàn)方式做保護(hù)處理,對用戶上傳分享的文檔內(nèi)容本身不做任何修改或編輯,并不能對任何下載內(nèi)容負(fù)責(zé)。
- 6. 下載文件中如有侵權(quán)或不適當(dāng)內(nèi)容,請與我們聯(lián)系,我們立即糾正。
- 7. 本站不保證下載資源的準(zhǔn)確性、安全性和完整性, 同時也不承擔(dān)用戶因使用這些下載資源對自己和他人造成任何形式的傷害或損失。
最新文檔
- 2024版三角高炮合同
- 專項公共區(qū)域裝飾裝修工程承包協(xié)議2024一
- 2025年國際合同第六號生皮國際貿(mào)易稅務(wù)籌劃合同3篇
- 二零二五年度餐飲企業(yè)員工培訓(xùn)與職業(yè)發(fā)展規(guī)劃合同3篇
- 2024起重機(jī)安裝與運(yùn)輸安全保障服務(wù)合同3篇
- 2025年度柴油發(fā)電機(jī)組租賃與維修保養(yǎng)合同4篇
- 2024石材荒料電子商務(wù)平臺合作協(xié)議6篇
- 個性化商標(biāo)創(chuàng)作協(xié)議:2024版委托書版A版
- 2024版生鮮供應(yīng)合同范本
- 2024金融居間服務(wù)的終止與解除合同
- 上海紐約大學(xué)自主招生面試試題綜合素質(zhì)答案技巧
- 辦公家具項目實施方案、供貨方案
- 2022年物流服務(wù)師職業(yè)技能競賽理論題庫(含答案)
- ?;钒踩僮饕?guī)程
- 連鎖遺傳和遺傳作圖
- DB63∕T 1885-2020 青海省城鎮(zhèn)老舊小區(qū)綜合改造技術(shù)規(guī)程
- 高邊坡施工危險源辨識及分析
- 中海地產(chǎn)設(shè)計管理程序
- 簡譜視唱15942
- 《城鎮(zhèn)燃?xì)庠O(shè)施運(yùn)行、維護(hù)和搶修安全技術(shù)規(guī)程》(CJJ51-2006)
- 項目付款審核流程(visio流程圖)
評論
0/150
提交評論