Unit 8 Literature 單元寫作課-讀后續(xù)寫 課件-高中英語北師大版（2019）選擇性必修第三冊

選必三U8單元主題寫作讀后續(xù)寫春風(fēng)高中英語教研組學(xué)習(xí)目標(biāo)1.掌握讀后續(xù)寫寫作技巧，行文思路2.積累一些細(xì)節(jié)描寫素材3.可以利用所學(xué)知識，準(zhǔn)確表達(dá)自己觀點(diǎn)，依據(jù)材料內(nèi)容，合理完成讀后續(xù)寫《考試說明》

提供一篇350詞以內(nèi)的材料，要求考生依據(jù)材料內(nèi)容、所給段落開頭語及所標(biāo)關(guān)鍵詞續(xù)寫一篇150詞左右的短文。將其發(fā)展成一篇與給定材料有邏輯銜接、情節(jié)和結(jié)構(gòu)完整的短文。續(xù)寫部分分為兩段。原文給出10處左右的標(biāo)有下劃線的關(guān)鍵詞語，所續(xù)寫短文應(yīng)使用5個以上（教育部，2015）（滿分25分）命題要求

短文

內(nèi)容和情節(jié)

詞匯和語句

1.詞數(shù):3502.體裁：記敘文或夾敘夾議為主3.故事邏輯性強(qiáng)，有情節(jié)，有起伏測試要求和特點(diǎn)1.有自由空間2.合乎情理和邏輯--有效續(xù)寫1.至少使用5個以上的關(guān)鍵詞2.每段段首句已給3.字?jǐn)?shù)：150±20words半限定寫作---“戴著鐐銬跳舞”《考試說明》閱卷時主要考慮以下內(nèi)容：1.與所給短文及段落開頭語的銜接程度；2.內(nèi)容的豐富性和對所給關(guān)鍵詞語的覆蓋情況；3.應(yīng)用語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯的豐富性和準(zhǔn)確性；4.上下文的連貫性評分參考

閱卷時主要考慮以下內(nèi)容：1.與所給短文及段落開頭語的銜接程度；2.內(nèi)容的豐富性和對所給關(guān)鍵詞語的覆蓋情況；3.應(yīng)用語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯的豐富性和準(zhǔn)確性；4.上下文的連貫性。第五檔（21-25分）（1）與所給短文融合度高，與所提供的段落開頭語銜接合理。（2）內(nèi)容豐富，應(yīng)用了5個以上短文中標(biāo)出的關(guān)鍵詞語。（3）所使用語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯豐富、準(zhǔn)確。（4）有效地使用了語句間的連接成分，所續(xù)寫短文結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊。閱卷評分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)閱卷時考慮以下幾個方面：(1)與所給短文及段落開頭語的銜接程度;(2)內(nèi)容的豐富性和對所標(biāo)出關(guān)鍵詞語的應(yīng)用程度;(3)應(yīng)用語法結(jié)構(gòu)結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯的豐富性和準(zhǔn)確性;(4)上下文的連貫。相關(guān)性：情節(jié)與原文的相關(guān)性--情節(jié)一定要回照原文；開放性：續(xù)寫的特性--構(gòu)思在邏輯上一定要合理，--多種可能性擇其優(yōu)而續(xù)寫所續(xù)部分：高立意、正能量、傳遞積極的情感態(tài)度原文與后續(xù)的融洽度；后續(xù)兩段間的融洽度；段落開頭語與后續(xù)語的融洽度。邏輯權(quán)重高于內(nèi)容、語言和情感前后邏輯要一致，內(nèi)容不偏離主旨邏輯靠內(nèi)容支撐，內(nèi)容靠語言表達(dá)融洽度高，銜接合理續(xù)寫文本得高分的關(guān)鍵：思維上與上文連貫，融洽度高；與所給短文及段落開頭語銜接合理；內(nèi)容上脈絡(luò)清晰、故事完整；語言上用詞豐富、準(zhǔn)確、句式多樣；對周圍環(huán)境和人物的心理描寫生動、到位；書寫美觀、卷面整潔，字?jǐn)?shù)在規(guī)定范圍內(nèi)。失分點(diǎn)分析內(nèi)容邏輯語言書寫（一）存在主要問題：

1、故事情節(jié)上的問題：1）與原文的融洽度不高。構(gòu)思不合邏輯，有悖常理。比如：沒搞清人物關(guān)系，沒看懂人物性格，甚至還有更離奇的結(jié)局。2）未有效利用原文劃線詞，忽視了文章標(biāo)題的暗示作用。存在主要問題：3、語言表達(dá)的問題1）基本句型上的錯誤多，句子架構(gòu)能力弱;2）時態(tài)混亂：本應(yīng)使用過去時的地方誤用成其它時態(tài);3）句子中動詞濫用:分不清非謂語與謂語.4）直接引語與間接引語使用錯誤較多;5）詞匯拼寫或用法有誤，出錯較多。4、卷面書寫問題（二）問題的主要原因

1、審題不清。沒有讀懂原文就下筆續(xù)寫。2、基礎(chǔ)知識掌握不牢固。常用單詞的用法記憶不準(zhǔn)確。3、句子架構(gòu)能力弱。不能形成英語思維，常見語法問題如三單、主謂一致、時態(tài)語態(tài)仍是失分災(zāi)區(qū)。4、學(xué)生閱讀量和社會生活閱歷有限。方法技巧

1．在讀懂原文的基礎(chǔ)上，緊扣原文中心，以原文的結(jié)局為起點(diǎn)，寫出故事情節(jié)的發(fā)展和變化。2．對原文故事沒有寫出的情節(jié)展開合理的推想，打開思路。多角度地想象出幾種情況或結(jié)局，并擇優(yōu)而寫。3．要注意前后照應(yīng)，符合邏輯，防止自相矛盾。必須與上文緊密聯(lián)系，使上下文融為一體。4．原文的主要角色，續(xù)文中都要安排“戲”，但不要引進(jìn)影響事件結(jié)局的新角色。五個一致注意確保五個一致：1.要與原文的主題或作者的本來意圖保持一致。2.要與原文的體裁、結(jié)構(gòu)、寫作手法保持一致。3.要與原文在人稱，主體時態(tài)上保持一致。4.要與人物的思想行為、性格特點(diǎn)保持一致。5.要與原文的語言特點(diǎn)和敘事風(fēng)格保持保持。致。探討六要素的意義whenwhowherewhyhowwhat確定文章的主體時態(tài)確定發(fā)生地點(diǎn)，激活環(huán)境詞匯用第幾人稱敘述，確定“入戲”人物，各自扮演何種角色通過邏輯，確定故事發(fā)展的可能性確定故事發(fā)展的每個階段:開始的寫作部分考查點(diǎn)，通過以上要素，確定續(xù)寫內(nèi)容Summary

1.讀透原文，把握故事發(fā)展脈絡(luò)，根據(jù)邏輯預(yù)測可能的結(jié)尾，擇優(yōu)而選；2.分析文章，確定人稱，主體時態(tài)；

3.讓每個角色入戲，想象出合理情節(jié)；4.激活話題詞匯，使用多樣句式。審題仔細(xì)，情節(jié)合理；詞匯豐富，句式多樣；過渡自然，結(jié)構(gòu)完整；卷面清晰，書寫優(yōu)美；對學(xué)生應(yīng)試的要求

讀后續(xù)寫一、寫作指導(dǎo)（一）整體框架（二）重點(diǎn)突破：提升描寫技能

一篇優(yōu)秀的讀后續(xù)寫離不開適當(dāng)?shù)募?xì)節(jié)描寫。因此，在續(xù)寫的過程中，同學(xué)們要對關(guān)鍵人物及故事情節(jié)進(jìn)行恰當(dāng)?shù)募?xì)節(jié)刻畫，這也是同學(xué)們進(jìn)行讀后續(xù)寫的一大難點(diǎn)。接下來我們將從細(xì)節(jié)描寫素材分類集錦和具體案例應(yīng)用來幫助同學(xué)們提升細(xì)節(jié)描寫技能。.

..

..

.▲細(xì)節(jié)描寫素材分類集錦分類集錦環(huán)境描寫（自然環(huán)境&社會環(huán)境）1.The

sun

began

to

rise

in

the

east,

bathing

the

mountain

in

golden

sunshine.

太陽開始從東方升起，使這座山沐浴在金色的陽光中。（自然環(huán)境）2.It

was

very

dark,

and

the

wind

howled

horribly

around

her.

天很黑而且風(fēng)在她的四周可怕地呼嘯著。（自然環(huán)境）3.The

weather

was

hot,

without

a

breath

of

wind.天氣炎熱，連一絲風(fēng)都沒有。（自然環(huán)境）4.It

was

so

quiet

in

the

classroom

that

the

sound

of

a

needle

dropping

onto

the

ground

could

be

heard.

教室里如此安靜以至于連一根針掉在地上的聲音都能被聽見。（社會環(huán)境）分類集錦動作描寫（結(jié)合情緒表達(dá)）1.He

was

almost

dancing

for

joy.

他高興得幾乎跳起舞來。2.The

children

were

jumping

up

and

down

with

excitement.孩子們興奮得跳來跳去。3.I

was

too

frightened

to

move,

but

two

girls

pushed

me

towards

him.

我嚇得不敢動，但兩個女孩把我推向他。續(xù)表分類集錦外貌與神態(tài)描寫1.The

young

woman

is

tall

and

elegant.

She

has

a

great

amount

of

dark

hair

that

shines

in

the

sunlight.

這個年輕的女子身材高挑，舉止優(yōu)雅。她有一頭在陽光下閃閃發(fā)亮的濃密的黑發(fā)。2.He

forced

a

smile

but

his

pale

face

gave

him

away.他勉強(qiáng)笑了一下，但他蒼白的臉色出賣了他。3.Scowling,

the

little

boy

was

in

low

spirits

at

the

thought

of

parting

with

his

friends.這個小男孩愁眉苦臉的，為即將和朋友們分別而情緒低落。續(xù)表分類集錦心理描寫1.A

sharp

sense

of

disappointment

came

over

him.

一種強(qiáng)烈的失望感襲上他的心頭。（失望）2.Upon

hearing

the

bad

news，

she

felt

seized

by

a

burst

of

sadness

and

couldn't

help

crying

bitterly.

一聽到這個壞消息，她感到一陣悲傷，忍不住痛哭起來。（悲傷）3.The

fear

that

consumed

her

every

waking

moment

made

it

hard

for

her

to

focus

on

anything

else.恐懼吞噬著她醒著的每一刻，使她很難把注意力集中在其他任何事情上。（害怕）續(xù)表greatsorrowcloudssb'seyes 滿眼憂傷havetearsinone'seyes/tearsswiminsb'seyes 眼里噙著淚水tearsroll/run/stream/flowdownsb'scheeks 潸然淚下tearswellupinsb'seyes 淚如泉涌beovercomewithsorrow 悲傷不已悲傷②喜悅wearasmileonone'sface 面帶笑容smilefromeartoear 笑得合不攏嘴sb'sfacelightsup/brightens 面露喜色jump/danceforjoy 手舞足蹈laughone'sheadoff 笑得前仰后合③憤怒tobeinafume;怒氣沖沖；tobeangeredby/at......；因.....而發(fā)怒；tofly(fall)intorage(fury);勃然大怒；inasuddenfitofanger;一怒之下；tobefilledwithanger;滿腔怒火；④驚訝gapeat 張口結(jié)舌地看gaspinastonishment 驚得倒吸一口氣blinkinsurprise 吃驚地睜眼beshockedbeyondwords驚訝得說不出話來toone'sastonishment 令某人吃驚的是改寫：Uponhearingthebadnews,_________________________________________________________________Skill1:實(shí)用詞組替換動詞，細(xì)化情感表達(dá)翻譯：________________________________________________________________翻譯：__________________________________________________shefeltseizedbyaburstofsadnessandcouldn’thelpcryingbitterly.Uponhearingthebadnews,shegotsadandcouldn’thelpcryingbitterly.一聽到這個消息，悲傷席卷而來，她哭得不能自已。Lily開心地笑了一下，然后加入了討論當(dāng)中。Lilysmiledhappilyandthenjoinedtheheateddiscussion.改寫：________________________________andthenjoinedtheheateddiscussion.Lilyworeashiningsmileonherface1.Toone's+情感名詞,sb…令某人……的是，他/她……_________________,she

alsosawsomeberrybushes.(2016年10月浙江卷)令她極其高興的是，她還見到了一片漿果林。Skill2:使用高分句型激活人物內(nèi)心情感2.情感類形容詞,sb…感到……,某人……_____________________,shehidherselfbehindthebigtree,holdingherbreath.既害怕又震驚,躲在大樹后邊,大氣都不敢出。

TohergreatjoyScaredandshocked3.Withsth+doing/介詞短語，sb…(伴隨著)……,某人……_______________________________________,thelittleboyslowlyfellasleep.小男孩慢慢睡著了，眼睛里噙滿了淚水。4.Seeing/Hearing/Thinking/Knowing/Realizing…,sb…看到/聽到/想到/得知……,某人……____________________________________________________________________,shefeltherselfthrownintoaworldofhopelessness.一想到又要獨(dú)自一人在野外度過一個晚上，她感覺自己陷入了完全的絕望當(dāng)中。WithtearswellingupinhiseyesThinkingthatshehadtospendanothernightinthewildbyherself(1)

tookmybreathawaywhenhebrokethenewstomeIwasadmittedtothemostfamouslawuniversity.

他帶給我消息說我被最著名的法律大學(xué)錄取了，我激動不已。(2)

crowdedintomymind.一陣恐懼/焦慮涌上我的心頭。(3)

spreadoverherface.她臉上蕩漾著柔美的微笑。Skill3:用事物代替人作主語,賦能各項情感（無靈主語）Excitement

Afloodoffear//anxietyAgentlesmile

1.比喻（simile明喻

&metaphor暗喻）Myheartislikeasingingbird.我的心像一只歌唱的小鳥Heisalyingdemon,notaman!他是一個撒謊的惡魔，不是人！2.夸張（hyperbole）他們哈哈大笑起來。翻譯：Theylaughedheavily.改寫：Theyalmostdiedlaughing.3.擬人（personification）Hereyesdanced

withgreatexcitement.她的眼睛歡快地上下打量著。Everynerveinhisbodywarned

himnottogoanyfurther.他身體上的每一根神經(jīng)都警告著他不要走太遠(yuǎn)。Skill4:使用修辭手法深化情感1.請嘗試?yán)m(xù)寫一個等待和老友重逢以及終于等到老友的情節(jié)。利用環(huán)境描寫烘托人物心理并側(cè)重人物高興和激動的心理描寫。（詞數(shù)80左右）

She

stood

by

the

window,

joyfully

and

patiently

watching.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Golden

sunlight

danced

in

her

long

hair

and

the

children's

laughter

floated

in

theair.（環(huán)境描寫，烘托人物心理）

She

stared

at

the

end

of

the

road,

hoping

her

close

friend

would

come

earlier.

A

wave

of

happiness

and

excitement

seized/swept

over/came

over

her

when

she

caught

sight

of

a

familiar

figure.（心理描寫）

Her

heart

beat

with

joy,

and

a

shining

smile

lit

up

her

face.（心理描寫）

She

ran

to

her

friend

and

threw

herself

into

her

friend's

arms.（動作描寫，人物心理的外在表現(xiàn)）▲具體案例應(yīng)用2.請嘗試?yán)m(xù)寫一個父親發(fā)怒的情節(jié)。利用動作、神態(tài)和語言描寫表現(xiàn)人物的憤怒。續(xù)寫中可適當(dāng)添加對"我"的緊張害怕的心理和動作描寫。（詞數(shù)80左右）

Never

had

my

father

been

so

furious

in

all

his

life

about

my

behavior

at

the

party._____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

With

unstoppable

rage

in

his

eyes,

he

was

like

an

angry

lion.（神態(tài)描寫）

His

face

turned

purple

with

anger,

but

he

didn't

shout

in

anger

as

usual.

He

just

glared

at

me

silently.（神態(tài)描寫）

His

staring

eyes

really

frightened

me.（心理描寫）

I

swallowed

nervously

and

looked

away.（動作描寫）

After

a

few

moments'

silence,

he

threw

his

coat

on

the

sofa

with

annoyance,

and

murmured,"What

should

I

do

with

you?"（動作描寫，語言描寫）3.請嘗試?yán)m(xù)寫一個王華考試失利之后難過的情節(jié)。利用動作、神態(tài)、心理等細(xì)節(jié)描寫表現(xiàn)人物的難過。（詞數(shù)80左右）

Wang

Hua

didn't

get

an

A

in

the

exam

as

expected.______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

He

shook

his

head

andlooked

upset.

His

friend

patted

his

shoulder,

and

comforted

him.

He

managed

a

smile

and

dropped/lowered

his

head

to

hide

his

sadness.（神態(tài)描寫，動作描寫）

Then

he

headed

slowly

home,

tears

in

his

eyes.（動作描寫，神態(tài)描寫）

In

front

of

the

door,

he

took

a

deep

breath,

opened

the

door

and

stepped

inside.（動作描寫）

As

soon

as

he

saw

his

mother,

a

wave

of

sadness

welled

up

within

him.（心理描寫）

He

threw

himself

into

his

mother's

arms

and

buried

his

head

in

her

skirt,

weeping.（動作描寫）4.請嘗試?yán)m(xù)寫Jenny摔倒在地上后的情節(jié)。利用環(huán)境、動作、神態(tài)和心理描寫表現(xiàn)人物的尷尬、羞愧和難過等。（詞數(shù)80左右）

Jenny

was

performing

in

front

of

the

whole

class

when

suddenly

she

fell

heavily

to

the

ground._________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Kids

laughed

in

surprise.（環(huán)境描寫）

Standing

uncomfortably

and

hopelessly

and

feeling

as

if

the

whole

world

were

laughing

at

her，Jenny

was

so

ashamed

that

the

color

flooded

her

cheeks.（心理描寫,神態(tài)描寫）

She

must

be

really

stupidto

fall

down

in

the

game!（心理描寫）

Disappointment

and

embarrassment

written

on

her

burning

face,

she

felt

tears

well

up

inher

eyes.

She

ran

swiftly

to

her

seat,

buried

her

face

in

her

hands

and

wept.（動作描寫）二、讀后續(xù)寫

閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。Saving

the

Carnations（康乃馨）

[2024遼寧大連市三校模擬考試]Dawn

broke.

Regina,

aged

14,

opened

her

sleepy

eyes

and

looked

out

of

the

window

at

the

foggy

field

below.

"NO!"

she

cried,

now

fully

awake.

Buttermilk,

a

cow,

was

in

Mama's

carnation

garden.

"I

must

have

forgotten

to

close

the

gate

last

night,"

Regina

thought

as

she

pulled

a

sweatshirt

over

her

head.

Mama

was

planning

to

sell

the

carnations

at

the

fair

the

next

week.

But

Buttermilk

was

eating

the

flowers.

Regina

hurried

outside

and

grabbed

the

lead

rope

on

the

wall.

"Why

can't

you

stay

in

the

field?"

she

called

to

Buttermilk

as

she

headed

across

the

yard

to

the

carnation

garden.

Buttermilk

still

stood

there

chewing

the

tender

flowers.

"When

I

grow

up,

I'll

be

an

artist

and

paint

pictures

all

day,"

Regina

thought,

annoyed.

"I'll

not

own

a

cow.

Too

much

trouble."

Regina

had

been

fond

of

painting

since

the

day

she

had

memory.

She

would

like

to

not

only

help

with

family

but

see

birds

and

flowers

alive

under

her

brush.

Just

as

Regina

was

about

to

throw

the

lead

rope

onto

Buttermilk's

collar,

the

family

dog

Blue,

rounded

the

corner

of

the

house,

barking

loudly

and

furiously.

Buttermilk

couldn't

stand

it

and

ran

off,

tearing

through

the

carnations.

It

finally

ran

through

the

open

gate

and

into

the

field

outside.

"Thank

goodness!"

Regina

said

as

she

closed

the

gate

and

secured

the

lock.

But,

as

she

turned

to

look

at

the

flower

garden,

most

of

the

carnations

were

either

eaten

or

trampled

（踐踏）.

Mama

and

Dad

came

out

of

the

house.

"What's

going

on?"

Mama

asked.

She

looked

sadly

at

her

garden.

"I

forgot

to

close

the

gate,"

Regina

said.

"I'm

so

sorry."

"I

know

you

are,"

Mama

sighed

and

gave

Regina

a

hug.

Regina's

heart

was

heavy

as

she

went

back

into

the

house.

Mama

had

prepared

much

for

the

fair

but

now

half

of

her

efforts

were

in

vain.

Regina

decided

to

think

of

a

way

to

make

it

up

to

her

mother.

The

problem

tasked

Regina's

mind.

Could

she

plant

other

flowers

in

a

week?

Not

enough

time.

Could

she

make

use

of

the

carnations

in

pieces?

Not

enough

magic.

Regina

found

no

way

out.

注意：續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右。Paragraph

1:

All

of

a

sudden,

a

flower

painting

on

the

wall

caught

Regi