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讀后續(xù)寫:Ilearnedtobemyself講義閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段,使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。MybrotherJackwassosmartthatheearnedafullscholarshiptoHarvard.Ioftenwishedhewasn’tsoperfectbecauseitmademefeellikeIhadtoworktwiceashardjusttoprovemyselftoothers.Ononehand,hissuccesswasachallengethatIenjoyed,butontheotherhand,itwasanimmensepressurethatIstruggledtocopewith.Tobalancehisrecordinhighschool,IfeltlikeIwasconstantlyrunningonatreadmill(跑步機(jī)),dedicatingeverymomenttoanon-stoprace.TherewasnoroomforrelaxationasIpursuedthatperfectrecord.Mylifeseemedtobecompressedintoaseriesofendlesstasksanddeadlines.“IneededanA,”Irepeatedtomyselfbeforethebiologytest,sothatIwouldmaintainmyperfectrecordandsecureaplaceonthehonorroll.Istudiedtillthelastminuteoflunchandrushedtoclass.IfeltasenseofconfidenceasIglancedoverthefirstpageofthetest,quicklyfillingintheanswerswithasmile.However,asIturnedtothelastpage,mymindwentblank.Timetickedby,andsoon,theclassroombegantoemptyasstudentsfinishedtheirtestsandleft,exceptme.“Lara,classended.Ineedyoutohandinyourtest,”Mrs.Phloemsaid,stretchingoutherhand.Reluctantly,Ihandedherthetestpaper.Thenextday,Ireceivedmytestback.Istareddumbfoundedattheredmark:76.NotevenaBminus,mymindscreamed.Justaverage.It’sover.Noperfectrecord.Ifeltanunprecedented(前所未有的)senseoffrustrationanddisappointment.Afterschool,Idraggedmyheavyfeetbackhome.WhenIpushedopenthedoor,Jackwassittingonthecouch,reading.Seeinghisleisurelystate,Icried,hardtocontainthejealousyandsadnessinmyheart.Jackimmediatelynoticedthedepressiononmyface.Heaskedwithconcern,“What’swrong,Lara?”Blindedbyfrustrationmixedwithatouchofjealousy,Ishoutedathim“HowIwishyouwerenotsoperfect!”注意:續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150個(gè)左右;請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。Paragraph1:Withahintofhurtandsurpriseinhiseyes,Jackgentlyapproachedme.Paragraph2:Hiswordswerelikeawarmbreeze,blowingmydepressionawayandchangingmymindset.解題思路與步驟續(xù)寫思路大致可以分為以下兩步:1.第一段:構(gòu)建情感沖突,展現(xiàn)Lara情緒爆發(fā)與Jack的回應(yīng)。通過情感描寫、動作鏈和沖突鋪墊,深化情節(jié)發(fā)展,表現(xiàn)兩人關(guān)系的初步緩和。2.第二段:情感升華與主題點(diǎn)明。通過Jack的開導(dǎo)、環(huán)境渲染、情感總結(jié),展現(xiàn)Lara逐漸釋懷的過程,點(diǎn)明故事的核心主題——成長與接納。第一段:構(gòu)思與情節(jié)發(fā)展開頭句:Withahintofhurtandsurpriseinhiseyes,Jackgentlyapproachedme.1.情感描寫(固定第1句)Awaveofguiltandfrustrationwelledupinmyheart,makingmeunabletomeethisgaze.設(shè)置情感基調(diào),表現(xiàn)Lara內(nèi)心的愧疚和壓抑。2.細(xì)節(jié)描寫(非固定句)Jackpaused,hiseyessoftbutconcerned,ashekneltslightlytomeetmyloweredgaze.細(xì)節(jié)化Jack的動作,體現(xiàn)他的理解與溫柔。3.動作鏈推進(jìn)(固定第3句)Uponhearingmyoutburst,hesethisbookaside,camecloser,andplacedahandgentlyonmyshoulder.連續(xù)動作推動情節(jié)發(fā)展,表現(xiàn)Jack的主動安撫。4.沖突鋪墊(非固定句)“YouthinkI’mperfect?I’vefailedtoo,Lara,”hesaidsoftly,hisvoicebreakingthesilence.Jack開口回應(yīng),為情節(jié)轉(zhuǎn)折做好鋪墊。5.情感推進(jìn)(非固定句)TearsstreameddownmyfaceasIwhispered,“Butyoualwaysmakeitlooksoeasy,andIfeelsosmallnexttoyou.”通過Lara的自我剖白,深化情感沖突。第二段:情節(jié)轉(zhuǎn)折與情感升華開頭句:Hiswordswerelikeawarmbreeze,blowingmydepressionawayandchangingmymindset.6.情節(jié)轉(zhuǎn)折(固定第5句)圖片“Lara,perfectionisn’treal.It’sokaytostruggle—it’showwegrowstronger,”Jacksaid,hisvoicecalmandsteady.Jack的話語帶來情節(jié)的轉(zhuǎn)折點(diǎn),直擊Lara內(nèi)心的痛點(diǎn)。7.細(xì)節(jié)描寫(非固定句)Hesmiledfaintly,hishandstillrestingonmyshoulder,asthesunlightspilledthroughthewindowanddancedacrosshisface.細(xì)節(jié)刻畫Jack的神態(tài)與環(huán)境,渲染溫暖氛圍。8.情感升華(固定第9句)Hearinghiswords,Ifeltawaveofreliefwashoverme,realizingthatit’sokaynottobeperfectallthetime.Lara領(lǐng)悟并釋懷,表現(xiàn)情感的升華。9.動作與情感結(jié)合(非固定句)Inoddedslightly,atearfulsmilespreadingacrossmyfaceasIwhispered,“Thanks,Jack.IthinkIunderstandnow.”動作與情感結(jié)合,展現(xiàn)Lara逐漸恢復(fù)自信。10.主題點(diǎn)睛(固定第10句)Thisexperiencetaughtmethatsuccessisn’taboutbeingflawless,butaboutlearning,growing,andacceptingmyselfalongtheway.點(diǎn)明故事主旨,升華主題,傳遞正能量。示例范文:Withahintofhurtandsurpriseinhiseyes,Jackgentlyapproachedme.Awaveofguiltandfrustrationwelledupinmyheart,makingmeunabletomeethisgaze.Jackpaused,hiseyessoftbutconcerned,ashekneltslightlytomeetmyloweredgaze.Uponhearingmyoutburst,hesethisbookaside,camecloser,andplacedahandgentlyonmyshoulder.“YouthinkI’mperfect?I’vefailedtoo,Lara,”hesaidsoftly,hisvoicebreakingthesilence.TearsstreameddownmyfaceasIwhispered,“Butyoualwaysmakeitlooksoeasy,andIfeelsosmallnexttoyou.”Hiswordswerelikeawarmbreeze,blowingmydepressionawayandchangingmymindset.“Lara,perfectionisn’treal.It’sokaytostruggle—it’showwegrowstronger,”Jacksaid,hisvoicecalmandsteady.Hesmiledfaintly,hishandstillrestingonmyshoulder,asthesunlightspilledthroughthewindowanddancedacrosshisface.Hearinghiswords,Ifeltawaveofreliefwashoverme,realizingthatit’sokaynottobeperfecta

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