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-Originally written by Jeffrey Astroff and Mike SikowitzTranscribed by Josh Hodge.Minor additions and adjustments by Dan SIlverstein.-Scene: Monica and Rachels apartment. Monica, Rachel, Ross, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is looking out the window.PHOEBE: Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Ugly Naked Guy is decorating his tree. Oh my God, you should see the size of his Christmas Balls.Chandler and Joey enter.JOEY: Hey.CHANDLER: Hey.RACHEL: Hey.JOEY: Hey, how much did you guys tip the super this year?super=superintendent舍監(jiān)AMERICAN someone who takes care of a building, especially an apartment buildingCHANDLER: Yeah, we were gonna give fifty, but if you guys gave more, we dont wanna look bad.MONICA: Oh, actually this year we just made him homemade cookies.CHANDLER: And twenty-five it is.JOEY: You gave him cookies?MONICA: Money is so impersonal. Cookies says someone really cares. . . Alright, were broke, but cookies do say that.impersonal不人性的not showing any feelings of sympathy, friendliness etcBusiness letters do not have to be impersonal and formal. Sometimes she seems a very impersonal, even unkind, mother.PHOEBE: I can see that. A plate of brownies once told me a limerick. browniesa thick flat chocolate cakechocolate brownies limerick:a humorous poem with five linesCHANDLER: Phoebs, let me ask you something, were, were these, uh, funny brownies?PHOEBE: Not especially. But you know what, I think they had pot in them. pot:大麻INFORMAL MARIJUANAROSS: So you guys, who else did you tip with cookies?RACHEL: Uhh, the mailman, the super.Theres a bang at the door.MONICA: Oh, and the newspaper delivery guy.Joey opens the door and picks up the remnants of the newspaper. remnant:a small remaining part of something:JOEY: Oh my God.RACHEL: What?JOEY: Uhhh, I dont think youre gonna like this.Joey shows them the torn-up newspaper.RACHEL: Ooh, goooosh, ooh, these are cookies smashed in the sports section.MONICA: Oh look, and he did my crossword puzzle. crossword puzzlea word game on paper, in which the answers to questions called clues are written in rows of squares that cross each other so that some letters are shared 【cross puzzle在英國(guó)非常非常流行,在bus或者地鐵上,經(jīng)常可以看見手里拿著報(bào)紙的人全神貫注地做題目。另外關(guān)于英國(guó)的報(bào)紙,地鐵辦有自己的報(bào)紙,是免費(fèi)拿的,放在每個(gè)大站的入口,但是因?yàn)槭敲赓M(fèi)的,所以一般每天九點(diǎn)后便沒有了,由于報(bào)紙是免費(fèi)的,所以大家也不珍惜,很多人看完就把它扔在地鐵座位上,然后后上車的人無(wú)聊想看的話,又可以拿來看看,所以把看完的報(bào)紙留在車廂內(nèi)成了英國(guó)的一種文化(甚至有其它非免費(fèi)的報(bào)紙)。】ROSS: Yeah, but not very well, unless 14-across, Gershwin musical actually is bitemebitemebitemebiteme.14-across: across puzzle的第十四序列 【上面那句話的意思是說newspaper delivery guy對(duì)于沒有得到錢,而只是cookie,很不高興,所以故意弄壞他們的報(bào)紙,并在上面寫上bitemebitemebitemebiteme】OPENING TITLESScene: Central Perk. Monica, Chandler, and Joey are seated at couches. Rachel is working behind the counter.JOEY: I cant believe its Christmas already. Ya know, I mean, one day your eatin turkey, the next thing ya know, your lords are a-leapin and you geese are a-layin.CHANDLER: Which is why geese are so relaxed this time of year.Ross enters with several bags from shopping.ROSS: Hey guys.CHANDLER, MONICA, and JOEY: Hey.Ross approaches Rachel at counter.ROSS: Hey Rach. I, uh, got you a little present. Rachel is not impressed. . Ill open it. Its a Slinky! Remember, huh. sings Walks down stairs, alone or in pairs, everyone knows its. . . just a big spring. Alright, you still mad at me becuase of the whole. . . slinky:slinky clothes fit your body closely and make you look sexually attractive【跟老友一起傻笑:羅斯在列舉瑞秋缺點(diǎn)名單事件爆發(fā)后給瑞秋買的禮物,也就是玩具總動(dòng)員里面出現(xiàn)過的彈簧狗,試圖挽回瑞秋的心。 】RACHEL: Horrible and degrading list of reasons not to be with me?ROSS: How bout from now on we just call it the unfortunate incident? Rachel walks off Hey Gunther, you got stairs in your place?GUNTHER: Yeah.ROSS: Here, go nuts. gives him the Slinky and goes and sits with others at the couchesgo nutsto become crazy:A man could go nuts sitting around wondering what might happen.ROSS: Hey guys.CHANDLER, MONICA, and JOEY: Hey.CHANDLER: Whats in the bag?ROSS: Um, just some presents.JOEY: Cmon show us what you bought. . . You know you want to.ROSS: childishly OK. OK, this is a picture frame from Ben to my parents, huh.MONICA: Cute.ROSS: I got some, uh, hers and hers towels for Susan and Carol. And, uh, I got this blouse for mom.Ross holds up the blouse. It is extremely tacky, with sewn-on medals hanging off of it. tacky:便宜的INFORMAL used about something that looks cheap and of poor quality or that shows bad taste【以后說“便宜的”,可以說tacky了】MONICA: Ross, that is gorgeous!ROSS: Yeah?MONICA: Look at these authentic fake medals. I tell ya, moms gonna be voted best dressed at the make-believe military academy. make-believethe activity of pretending that something is real or that a situation is better than it really isPhoebe enters.PHOEBE: Hey.GANG: Hey. Hi Phoebe.PHOEBE: Happy Christmas Eve Eve. sees Rosss picture frame Oh my God, where did you get this? Christmas Eve 是圣誕節(jié)前夜Christmas Eve Eve 就是圣誕節(jié)前夜 的前一天晚上ROSS: Uh, Macys, third floor, home furnishings. Macys之前解釋過了,一家美國(guó)的百貨公司PHOEBE: This is my father, this is a picture of my dad.CHANDLER: Nah, Phoebs, thats the guy that comes in the frame.PHOEBE: No it isnt, this is my dad, alright, Ill show you.RACHEL: Phoebe, I thought your dad was in prison.PHOEBE: No, thats my stepdad. My real dads the one that ran out on us before I was born.RACHEL: How have you never been on Oprah? Oprah Winfrey一個(gè)美國(guó)脫口秀著名的主持人,因?yàn)樗暗娜兆雍鼙瘧K,所以她剛開始主持的節(jié)目的特色也是從訪問悲慘人物開始慢慢成名的。所以Rachel才會(huì)這么說。當(dāng)然后來節(jié)目就轉(zhuǎn)型了,不再是悲慘生活的節(jié)目,現(xiàn)實(shí)生活中Friends的這幾個(gè)演員也經(jīng)常上Oprah的節(jié)目。 Oprah詳細(xì)的介紹StartFragment 奧普拉蓋爾溫芙瑞(Oprah Winfrey;1954年1月29日)是美國(guó)最成功的企業(yè)家和電視節(jié)目主持人之一。出生于密西西比州的科修斯科。這個(gè)非裔美國(guó)女人出身貧寒她的不到20歲就未婚先孕的雙親分別是女仆沃內(nèi)塔李(Vernita Lee)和一個(gè)士兵弗農(nóng)溫芙瑞(Vernon Winfrey)。她的出生證明上寫的是奧帕(Orpah),本來是取自圣經(jīng)舊約全書里路得記一卷里面的其中一位摩阿布族女人的名字,但是鄰居們?cè)谧x寫她的名字時(shí)把其中的R和P調(diào)換了位置。最終奧普拉成了廣泛接受的名字。溫芙瑞19歲開始其廣播生涯。她是納什維爾(Nashville)WTVF-TV最年輕的新聞主播和第一個(gè)非裔女主播。其后轉(zhuǎn)到巴爾的摩(Baltimore)WJZ-TV成為六點(diǎn)鐘(新聞)的主播之一。然后又被招募至理查德舍爾(Richard Sher) 麾下成為WJZ的地方脫口秀節(jié)目人們?cè)谡f(People Are Talking)的主持人之一。1985年溫芙瑞移居芝加哥取代別人成為WLS-TV的一個(gè)低收視率的半小時(shí)的晨間脫口秀AM芝加哥(AM Chicago)的主持人. 節(jié)目在溫芙瑞的主持下在不到一年的時(shí)間里就取得了很大的成功,并重新命名為奧普拉溫芙瑞秀(The Oprah Winfrey Show), 并擴(kuò)充時(shí)長(zhǎng)為一小時(shí)在全國(guó)首播。最初節(jié)目遵循傳統(tǒng)脫口秀形式。在1990年代中期,形式變得更加嚴(yán)肅,選題更加偏重溫芙瑞認(rèn)為對(duì)女人至為重要并產(chǎn)生重要結(jié)果的問題。溫芙瑞也開始做了大量的慈善工作,她的節(jié)目對(duì)一些飽受貧窮折磨的人和意外事件的受害者做了特寫。溫芙瑞通常對(duì)媒體公開討論她生活的各方面,包括一些不那么愉快的事情,例如受到性騷擾的童年及因而導(dǎo)致的毒品問題。1990年,她同母異父的妹妹Patricia Lee-Lloyd透露溫芙瑞曾于14歲懷孕并產(chǎn)下一個(gè)死嬰。溫芙瑞的體重波動(dòng)使她成了減肥的精神領(lǐng)袖。在1990年代末,溫芙瑞把她的書友會(huì)介紹到了電視上,不管她推薦什么,那本書立刻成為暢銷書,這已經(jīng)成為她的影響力的明證。在1996年4月16日與霍華德萊曼(Howard Lyman)討論瘋牛病的節(jié)目中, 溫芙瑞喊道:這讓我在想再吃一個(gè)漢堡時(shí)冷靜下來!1998年德克薩斯州的養(yǎng)牛人起訴了她的節(jié)目和萊曼無(wú)端誹謗易腐食品及行業(yè)歧視., 稱溫芙瑞的評(píng)論導(dǎo)致牛價(jià)下跌, 造成牛肉生產(chǎn)者損失了1200萬(wàn)美元. 兩個(gè)月后的2月26日,座無(wú)虛席的德克薩斯畜牧業(yè)鄉(xiāng)間法庭宣判溫芙瑞言行并未惡意,因而無(wú)罪,無(wú)需為損失負(fù)責(zé). 事后溫芙瑞收到了來自Rosie ODonnell的明信片:祝賀你,你戰(zhàn)勝了牛肉!溫芙瑞創(chuàng)辦了天使網(wǎng)絡(luò),(The Angel Network), 一個(gè)每年募集成百萬(wàn)美元善款的組織. 她出版了自己的雜志 O, 奧普拉雜志 和O居家, 并與別人一起成立了女人有限電視網(wǎng)氧氣. 她是哈博出品(Harpo,即反寫的奧普拉)的董事長(zhǎng), 出版包括托妮莫里森(Toni Morrison)的小說心愛的(Beloved)改編的電視劇等. 溫芙瑞也涉足演藝事業(yè),最引人注目的是在電影紫色(The Color Purple,她因此獲得奧斯卡提名)和她自己出品的心愛的中的演出。她也是一個(gè)出版物作者, 2002年艾美獎(jiǎng)第一屆鮑勃霍普(Bob Hope)人道獎(jiǎng)獲得者. 溫芙瑞主要在伊利諾斯州的芝加哥活動(dòng)但是在加利福尼亞的蒙特斯托也有一處住宅. 據(jù)說她最近在毛伊島也置辦了產(chǎn)業(yè).溫芙瑞最近簽約將把節(jié)目延伸到2010-2011年度. 到那時(shí)她的節(jié)目已經(jīng)播出25年了. 她也計(jì)劃每年主持140場(chǎng)節(jié)目, 到最后時(shí)再回到現(xiàn)有的數(shù)字上, 130場(chǎng).根據(jù)2004年的福布斯雜志稱, 奧普拉溫芙瑞據(jù)信身家超過10億美金. 奧普拉最近住在她的42英畝的加州蒙特斯托(Montecito)的住宅里. 據(jù)說奧普拉出席前戶主的聚會(huì)時(shí)愛上了這個(gè)房子,結(jié)果花掉了她5000萬(wàn)美元, 雖然人家不是準(zhǔn)備賣的. 她在新澤西州的拉瓦萊特(Lavalette)也有房產(chǎn).PHOEBE: showing her pictures OK, look, see, this is him. My mother gave me this picture before she died, same guy.MONICA: Honey, uh, this is a picture of the frame guy posing in front of a bright blue screen with a collie. collie:a dog with long hair, kept as a pet or used as a SHEEPDOGPHOEBE: Its not a blue screen. its just, maybe it was just really clear that day. OK, I have to talk to my grandmother. turns to leave clear:晴空無(wú)云MONICA: Oh, wait a minute honey.GANG: Phoebs. Phoebe leavesMONICA: Wow.JOEY: So anyway, Im trying to get my bosss ex-wife to sleep with me. . .GANG: Joey!JOEY: Oh, but when Phoebe has a problem, everyones all ears! all ears INFORMALready to pay attention to what someone has to sayScene: Phoebes grandmothers place. Phoebes grandmother is sitting at the table, reading the obituaries, and crossing out names in the phonebook.GRANDMOTHER: Esther Livingston. scratches out name Gone.Phoebe enters.GRANDMOTHER: Hi, Phoe.PHOEBE: Hi Gram. Whatcha doin?GRANDMOTHER: Oh, just updating the phonebook. 【updating the phonebook,Phoe的外祖母真夠無(wú)聊的,呵呵】PHOEBE: Um, gram, um, can I see the pictures of my dad again?GRANDMOTHER: nervously Oh. Oh, sure, sure, uh, uh, how come?PHOEBE: Just, you know, to see. um.GRANDMOTHER: Oh, sure, yeah. gets a box with the pictures This is the one of you father in a meadow, and, uh, helping a little boy fly a kite, and here he is at a graduation. . . another graduation. . . another graduation.PHOEBE: OK, is this really my father?GRANDMOTHER: Is it really your fa-I cant. well of course it is.PHOEBE: OK, I smell smoke. Maybe thats cause someones pants are on fire.GRANDMOTHER: Look, I. . .PHOEBE: Ya know, in all the years that we have been grandmother and granddaughter, you have never lied to me.GRANDMOTHER: Alright, that is not your father, thats just a picture of a guy in a frame.PHOEBE: Oh God.GRANDMOTHER: It was your mothers idea. Ya know, she didnt want you to know your real father because it hurt her so much when he left, and, I didnt want to go along with it, but, well then she died and, and it was harder to argue with her. Not impossible, but harder.PHOEBE: Alright, so, what, hes not a famous tree surgeon? And then, I guess, OK, he doesnt live in a hut in Burma where theres no phones? huta small simple shelter:a village of stone hutsa beach hutBurma:緬甸,98年以后改名叫Myanmar。swordlover班上有一個(gè)緬甸的同學(xué)。因?yàn)榫挼閬淼耐瑢W(xué)非常少,因此他經(jīng)常跟我們中國(guó)同學(xué)混??雌饋肀任覀冃『芏啵呛髞?,他居然告訴我們他在緬甸已經(jīng)離過婚,而且還有小孩在緬甸。畢業(yè)后,他留在了英國(guó)的一家信用卡公司。GRANDMOTHER: Last I heard, he was a pharmacist somewhere upstate. upstatein the northern part of a state in the U.S.:upstate New YorkPHOEBE: OK, that makes no sense. Why would the villagers worship a pharmacist?GRANDMOTHER: Honey.PHOEBE: realizes Oh.GRANDMOTHER: Anyway, thats all I know. That, and this. pulls apart a frame and pulls a picture out This is the real him.PHOEBE: Oh.Scene: Monica and Rachels apartment. Rachel, Chandler, and Joey are decorating the Christmas tree.CHANDLER: Ya know I remember my father, all dressed up in the red suit, the big black boots, and the patent leather belt, sneakin around downstairs. He didnt want anybody to see him but hed be drunk so hed stumble, crash into something and wake everybody up.RACHEL: Well, that doesnt sound like a very merry Christmas.CHANDLER: Who said anything about Christmas?Monica and Ross enter.MONICA: Hi.ROSS: Hey, anyone hear from Phoebe yet?RACHEL: No, nothin.MONICA: I hope shes OK.JOEY: Yeah, I know exactly what shes goin through.MONICA: How do you know exactly what shes going through? go through to experience something difficult or unpleasant:We cant really imagine what theyre going through.JOEY: She told us.CHANDLER: So whaddya got there Monica?MONICA: Just some stuff for the party.ROSS: Yeah, whatre you guys doin here, arent you supposed to be Christmas shopping?MONICA: You guys havent gotten your presents yet? Tomorrows Christmas Eve, whatre ya gonna do?CHANDLER: Dont you have to be Claymation to say stuff like that? 【not sure】RACHEL: Oh, by the way Mon, I dont think the mailman liked your cookies. Here are the ornaments your mom sent. hands her a smashed box ornamentcount a small attractive object used for decoration or for making someone or something more beautiful:Christmas tree ornamentsan old china ornament belonging to her grandmothMONICA: Well, maybe the mailman liked the cookies, we just didnt give him enough.JOEY: Monica, pigeons learn faster that you.Ross approaches Rachel, away from everyone else.ROSS: Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know whatll make you feel better. How bout you make a list about me.RACHEL: Wha. forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . .ROSS: Cmon Rachel.RACHEL: OK, youre whiney, you are, youre obsessive, you are insecure, youre, youre gutless, you know, you dont ever, you dont just sort of seize the day, you know. You like me for what, a year, you didnt do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair(你的頭發(fā)上了太多發(fā)膠了).ROSS: See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said.RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? Youre right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. she walks off and Ross puts his hand to his hairScene: Back at Phoebes. She is on the phonePHOEBE: Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica. . . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldnt call youself information. hangs upIthica:in ancient Greek stories, an island off the east coast of Greece which was the home of OdysseusAlbany:the capital city of New York State in the USPhoebes grandmother entersGRANDMOTHER: Hey.PHOEBE: Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name.GRANDMOTHER: Cmon now Phoe, dont still be mad at me. Hows it going?PHOEBE: Well, not so good. Upstates pretty big, hes pretty small, you do the math.GRANDMOTHER: Well, I think youre better off without him. Oh honey, I know hes your daddy but, but to me hes still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole her Gremlin.Gremlin:a small imaginary creature that people blame when they have problems with machinesPHOEBE: No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know.GRANDMOTHER: I know. OK, I wasnt completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, I didnt know exactly where he lived.PHOEBE: Whattaya mean?GRANDMOTHER: He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, youve gone too far. You can take my cab.PHOEBE: Wow. Thank you.GRANDMOTHER: Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab.PHOEBE: Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, Im gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! blows a kiss to a picture of EinsteinCommercialScene: Chandler is standing on a street corner waiting for Phoebe in the cab. Joey walks up.JOEY: Phoebe here with the cab yet?CHANDLER: Yeah, she, she brought the invisible cab. . . hop in.JOEY: Well she better get here soon, the outlet stores close at 7.CHANDLER: Hey, dont worry. I figure itll be 2 hours to Phoebes dads house, theyll meet, theyll chat, theyll swap life stories, well still have plenty of time.Phoebe drives up in the cabJOEY: Hey, here she comes.Chandler: Hey.JOEY: Hey.Phoebe runs over the curb. Joey gets in the back seat, Chandler in the frontPHOEBE: Hey.JOEY: Hey.PHOEBE: Can you believe this. In, like, two hours Im gonna have a dad. Eeeshk.CHANDLER: Eeeshk.JOEY: Yeah, big stuff.PHOEBE: OK, lets go.CHANDLER: OK.PHOEBE: Alright, here, you have to hold this. hands Chandler a piece of paperCHANDLER: OK. reads paper Brake left, gas right(剎車在左邊,油門在右邊)?PHOEBE: Uh-huh, yeah, thats my cheat sheet(作弊的小紙條).CHANDLER: grabs for seat belt Wheres my seat belt?PHOEBE: Oh, no no, that side doesnt have one, the paramedics had to cut through it. Chandler jumps out of the carprarmedicsomeone who is trained to give medical treatment to people at the place where an accident has happenedCHANDLER: Chandler gets in the back seat Hey!JOEY: Hey. Phoebe takes off, Joey and Chandler are thrown back in the seatScene: Monica and Rachels apartment. Monica is preparing for the party with Ross questioning her.ROSS: Cmon, just tell me, please, please.MONICA: For the sixteenth time, no. I do not think youre obsessive.obsessive:thinking or worrying about something all the time, so that you do not think about other things enough - used to show disapprovalan obsessive concern with cleanliness and orderRachel enters from her roomRACHEL: Oh, gosh, its hot in here.MONICA: Rach, get the heat. Rachel holds up her hand with wet fingernail polish Ross, could you turn the heat down please?ROSS: Sure. By the way, theres a difference between being obsessive and. . .MONICA: Ross, the heat!ROSS: Fine, OK! Heat, heat, heat, and Im the obsessive one. goes to the radiator and starts turning the knob OK, this way is on, so this is. . . breaks off the knob off.RACHEL: Did you just break the radiator?ROSS: No, no, I was turnin the knob and, and. . . here it is.MONICA: Well put it back.ROSS: It uhh, it wont go back.RACHEL: Ill call the super.MONICA: Here, let me try.ROSS: Oh, oh thats right, I forgot about your ability to fuse metal.MONICA: Hey, its Funnys cousin, Not Funny.【Funnys cousin, Not Funny意思還是說不好笑,字面意思說“(他)是Funny的侄子,不是Funny先生本人”,把Funny當(dāng)作人名,擬人化了。隱含的意思是你說的話一點(diǎn)都不好笑(not funny)】RACHEL: on phone Hi, Mr. Treeger. Hi, its Rachel Green from upstairs. Yes, somebody, uh, broke our knob on the radiator and its really hot in here. Yes, its, its hot enough to bake cookies. Well, do you think we could have a new one by 6? Wha t, no, no, Tuesday, we cant wait u
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