哈佛75年研究報(bào)告：什么樣的人才能活得更美好？

1、 兆龍移民 哈佛75年研究報(bào)告：什么樣的人才能活得更美好？導(dǎo)讀：在這75年間，哈佛大學(xué)的研究顯示：發(fā)展得最好的人是那些把精力投入關(guān)系，尤其是家人、朋友和周圍人群的人。以下為Dr. Robert Waldinger 演講內(nèi)容：生命進(jìn)程中，是什么讓我們保持健康和幸福？如果你現(xiàn)在開始著手規(guī)劃未來最好的人生，你會(huì)把時(shí)間和精力花在哪里？回答有很多種，我們已經(jīng)被無以計(jì)數(shù)的有關(guān)生活中最重要事物的圖景轟炸了。媒體上充斥著那些富有、高聲望、建立起自己事業(yè)帝國(guó)的成功人士故事。并且我們對(duì)這些故事堅(jiān)信不疑。有個(gè)最新的調(diào)查，詢問1980-2000年生的年輕人，他們最重要的人生目標(biāo)有哪些。超過80%的人說，他們主要的生活

2、目標(biāo)是要變富有。這群年輕人中，還有50%說他們另一個(gè)主要生活目標(biāo)是成名。What keeps us healthy and happy as we go through life? If you were going to invest now in your future best self, where would you put your time and your energy? There are lots of answers out there. We are bombarded with images, whats most important in life. The med

3、ia are filled with stories of people who are rich and famous and building empires at work. And we believe those stories. Theres a recent survey of millennials asking them what their most important life goals were. And over 80% said that the major life goal for them was to get rich. And another 50% o

4、f those same young adults said another major life goal was to become famous.我們總是被告誡要投入工作，努力奮斗，完成更多。我們似乎覺得要生活得更好，這些就是我們需要追求的?？墒聦?shí)真是這樣嗎？這些真的是在人類生命歷程中幫助他們保持幸福感的東西嗎？And we are constantly told to lean into work, and to push harder, and achieve more. We are given the impression that these are the things th

5、at we need to go after in order to have a good life. But is that true? Is that really what keeps people happy as they go through life?人一生中所做的選擇以及這些選擇怎樣影響他們，我們幾乎無從得知。我們對(duì)于人生絕大多數(shù)的理解，是從他人的回憶中獲得的。我們知道，人是不可能有完整清楚的記憶的。我們生命中大部分發(fā)生過的事情我們都遺忘了。有時(shí)我們記憶形成過程簡(jiǎn)直充滿創(chuàng)造性。馬克·吐溫曾經(jīng)說過類似的話。他說道，“我人生中一些最悲慘的事情根本就沒發(fā)生過。” 研究顯示

6、，隨著年齡的增長(zhǎng)，我們實(shí)際上以一種更積極的方式在保存我們的記憶。我想起一張廣告上說的：“任何時(shí)候開始擁有幸福的童年，都不算晚。”Pictures of entire lives, of the choices that people make and how those choices work out for them,those pictures are almost impossible to get. Most of what we know about human life, we know from asking people to remember the past. And a

7、s we know,hindsight is anything but 20/20. We forget vast amounts of what happens to us in our lives. And sometimes memory was downright creative. Mark Twain understood this. Hes quoted as saying, “some of the worst things in my life never happened”.(Laughter) And research shows us that we actually

8、remember the past more positively as we get older. And Im reminded of a bumper sticker that says, its never too late to have a happy childhood”. (Laughter)但要是我們能夠觀察整個(gè)人生呢？要是我們能從人們青少年時(shí)期一直追蹤到老年，去觀察到底什么才是真正能夠幫助人們保持幸福、健康的東西呢？我們已經(jīng)做到了。But, what if we could watch entire lives as they unfold through time? Wh

9、at if we could study people from the time that they were teenagers all the way into old age, to see what really keeps people happy and healthy? We did that.哈佛成人發(fā)展研究可能是目前有關(guān)成年人生活研究中歷時(shí)最長(zhǎng)的。75年間，我們追蹤了724位男性。年復(fù)一年，我們?cè)儐査麄兊墓ぷ鳌⒓彝ド?、他們的健康狀況，當(dāng)然我們?cè)谠儐栠^程中并不知道他們的人生將會(huì)怎樣。這樣的研究極為稀少。幾乎所有類似的研究都在10年內(nèi)流產(chǎn)了，原因可能是失訪率太高，或者沒有足夠

10、的經(jīng)費(fèi)支撐，或者研究者興趣點(diǎn)轉(zhuǎn)移或去世以后沒有其他人接手。但是多虧了運(yùn)氣以及幾代研究者的堅(jiān)持，這項(xiàng)研究成活下來了。在最早的724名男性中，大約有60位還在世，并繼續(xù)參與這項(xiàng)研究，他們絕大多數(shù)都已經(jīng)超過90歲了?，F(xiàn)在我們正開始研究他們總數(shù)超過2000個(gè)的孩子們。而我是這項(xiàng)研究的第四任領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者。The Harvard Studyof Adult Development may be the longest study of adult life, thats ever been done. For 75 years, weve tracked the lives of 724 men. Year a

11、fter year asking about their work, their home lives, their health, and of course asking all along the way without knowing how their life stories were going to turn out.Studies like this are exceedingly rare. Almost all projects of this kind fallapart within a decade, because too many people drop out

12、 of the study or funding for the research dries up, or the researchers get distracted or they die and nobody moves the ball further down the field. But through combination of luck and persistence of several generations of researchers, this study has survived. About 60 of our original 724 men are sti

13、ll alive, still participating in the study, most of them in their nineties. And we are now beginning to study themore than 2000 children of these men. And Im the 4th director of the study.從1938年起，我們追蹤了2組男性。第一組在加入研究時(shí)還是哈佛大學(xué)大二的學(xué)生。他們屬于Tom Brokaw所說的“最偉大的一代”。他們都在第二次世界大戰(zhàn)期間完成大學(xué)學(xué)業(yè)。之后絕大多數(shù)人為戰(zhàn)爭(zhēng)工作。另外一組我們追蹤的群體是波士

14、頓最貧窮區(qū)域的男孩。正是因?yàn)樗麄儊碜杂?0世紀(jì)30年代波士頓麻煩最多、最底層的家庭，才被選入我們的研究。多數(shù)人都住在出租屋里，許多甚至沒有熱的或冷的自來水。當(dāng)他們?nèi)脒x研究之后，所有的青少年都接受面談和醫(yī)學(xué)檢查。我們?nèi)ニ麄兗依飳?duì)他們的父母進(jìn)行訪談。后來這群青少年長(zhǎng)大成人，進(jìn)入社會(huì)各行各業(yè)。有的成了工廠工人，成了律師、泥瓦匠、醫(yī)生，有一位成為美國(guó)總統(tǒng)。有的成了酒精依賴者，一些患上精神分裂癥。有的從社會(huì)底層一路爬升到上流社會(huì)。而一些人卻沿著相反的方向走過這段人生旅程。Since 1938, weve tracked the lives of 2 groups of men. The first gr

15、oup started in the study when they were sophomores at Harvard College. They were from, what Tom Brokaw has called, the greatest generation. They all finished college during World War II. And then most went off to serve in the war. And the second group that we followed was a group of boys from the Bo

16、stons poorest neighborhoods. Boys, who were chosen for this study specifically because they were from some of the most troubled and disadvantaged families in Boston of the 1930s. Most lived in tenements, many without hot and cold running water. When they entered the study, all of theseteenagers were

17、 interviewed, they were given medical exams. We went to their homes and we interviewed their parents. And then these teenagers grew up into adults who entered all walks of life. They became factory workers and lawyers and bricklayers and doctors, and one president of the United States. Some develope

18、d alcoholism. A few developed schizophrenia. Some climbed the social ladder from the bottom all the way to the very top. And some made that journey in the opposite direction.這項(xiàng)研究的發(fā)起者無論如何也不可能想到，75年之后我能夠站在這里，告訴你們這項(xiàng)研究仍然在繼續(xù)。每?jī)赡?，我們充滿耐心和辛勤的研究人員打電話給我們的研究對(duì)象，詢問是否能夠再寄給他們一套有關(guān)他們生活的問卷。波士頓城郊的許多研究對(duì)象問我們：“你們?cè)趺纯偸遣粩嗟叵?/p>

19、要研究我？我的生活沒什么意思啊?！倍鸬漠厴I(yè)生從沒問過這個(gè)問題。為了得到他們?nèi)松钋逦漠嬀恚覀儾粌H僅只是寄給他們問卷。我們?cè)谒麄兊目蛷d里對(duì)他們進(jìn)行訪談。我們從他們的醫(yī)生那里獲取醫(yī)療記錄。我們獲取他們的血樣，掃描他們的大腦。我們和他們的孩子們交談。我們用攝像機(jī)記錄他們和自己的妻子談?wù)撟铍[秘的擔(dān)憂。大概十年前，我們終于詢問他們的妻子們，是否愿意作為研究對(duì)象加入我們的研究。很多女士都說：“你知道，是時(shí)候了?！盩he founders of this study would never, in their wildest dreams, have imagined that I would be

20、 standing here today, 75 years later, telling you that the study still continues. Every 2 years, our patient and dedicated research staff calls up our men and asked them whether we could send them yet one more set of questions about their lives. Many of the intercity Boston men ask us, “Why do you k

21、eep wanting to study me? My life just isnt that interesting”. The Harvard men never asked that question. (Laughter) To get the clearest picture of these lives, we dont just send them questionnaires. We interviewed them in their living rooms. We get their medical records from their doctors. We draw t

22、heir blood. We scanned their brains. We talk to their children. We videotaped them talking with their wives about their deepest concerns. And when about a decade ago we finally asked the wives if they would join us as members of this study, many of the women said, “you know，its about time”. (Laughte

23、r)那么我們學(xué)到了什么？我們從這些人生活中提取出來的長(zhǎng)篇累牘的信息到底教會(huì)我們什么？其實(shí)，完全無關(guān)財(cái)富、名聲或者拼命工作。我們從這項(xiàng)長(zhǎng)達(dá)75年的研究中得到的最清晰的信息是：良好的關(guān)系讓我們更快樂，更健康。就這樣！So what have we learned? What are the lessons that come from that tens of thousands of pages of information that weve generated on these lives. Well the lessons arent about wealth or fame or wor

24、king harder and harder. The clearest message that we get from this 75-year study is this: good relationships keep us happier and healthier.Period!對(duì)于關(guān)系，我們學(xué)到了三條。第一條是，社會(huì)連結(jié)真的對(duì)我們有益，而孤獨(dú)卻有害。事實(shí)證明，和家庭、朋友和周圍人群連結(jié)更緊密的人更幸福。他們身體更健康，他們也比連結(jié)不甚緊密的人活得更長(zhǎng)。而孤單的體驗(yàn)是有害的。和不孤獨(dú)的人相比，那些比自己所希望的樣子更孤單的人覺得自己更不幸福，他們到中年時(shí)健康狀況退化地更快，他們的大

25、腦功能衰退更早，而且他們的壽命更短。令人遺憾的是，任何一個(gè)時(shí)刻，每5個(gè)美國(guó)人中就有不只1個(gè)說自己孤獨(dú)。我們知道，在人群中你也可能感到孤獨(dú)，在婚姻中你也可能感到孤獨(dú)。Weve learned 3 big lessons about relationships. The first is that social connections arereally good for us and that loneliness kills. It turns out that people who are more socially connected to family, to friends, to c

26、ommunity are happier. They are physically healthier and they live longer than people who are less well connected. And the experience of loneliness turns out to be toxic. People, who are more isolated than they want to be from others, find that theyre less happy, their health declines earlier in mid-

27、life, their brain functioning declines sooner, and they live shorter lives than people who are not lonely. And the sad fact is, that at any given time, more than 1 in 5 Americans will report, that they are lonely. And we know that you can be lonely in a crowd, and you can be lonely in a marriage.所以我

28、們學(xué)到的第二條信息是，起決定作用的不是你擁有的朋友的數(shù)量，不是你是否在一段穩(wěn)定的親密關(guān)系中，而是你的親密關(guān)系的質(zhì)量。事實(shí)證明，處于沖突之中真的對(duì)我們的健康有害。舉個(gè)例子，充滿沖突而沒有感情的婚姻，對(duì)我們的健康非常不利，甚至有可能比離婚還糟。而生活在良好、溫暖的關(guān)系中是有保護(hù)作用的。當(dāng)我們追蹤我們的研究對(duì)象到他們的80歲之后，我們希望回顧他們的中年生活，來看看我們是否能在那時(shí)預(yù)測(cè)誰會(huì)享有幸福健康的晚年，誰不會(huì)。當(dāng)我們把所有有關(guān)他們50歲的信息都整合起來之后，發(fā)現(xiàn)能夠預(yù)測(cè)他們晚年生活的不是他們的中年膽固醇水平，而是他們對(duì)所在親密關(guān)系的滿意程度。50歲時(shí)對(duì)自己的親密關(guān)系最滿意的人，80歲時(shí)最健康。而

29、良好、親密的關(guān)系似乎能緩沖我們?cè)谒ダ线^程中遇到的坎坷。我們生活的最幸福的伴侶，無論男女，在他們80歲之后都說，當(dāng)他們感到更多軀體疼痛時(shí)，他們的心情依然快樂。而那些處于不幸關(guān)系中的人，當(dāng)他們感受到更多軀體疼痛時(shí)，這些疼痛被增加的情感痛苦給放大了。So the 2nd big lesson that we learned is that its not just the number of friends you have, and its not whether or not you are in a committed relationship, but its the quality of

30、your close relationships that matters. It turns out that living in the midst of conflicts is really bad for our health. High conflicted marriages, for example, without much affection, turn out to be very bad for our health - perhaps worse than getting divorced. And living in the midst of good, warm

31、relationships, is protective. Once weve followed our men all the way into their 80s, we wanted to look back at them at mid-life, and to see if we can predict who was going to grow into a happy, healthy octogenarian and who wasnt. And when we gather together, everything we knew about them at age 50,

32、it wasnt their middle age cholesterol levels that predicted how they were going to grow old. It was how satisfied they were in their relationships. The people, who were the most satisfied in their relationships at age 50, were the healthiest at age 80. And good close relationships seem to buffer us

33、from some of the slings and arrows of getting old. Our most happily partnered men and women, reported in their 80s, that on the days when they had more physical pain, their moods stayed just as happy. But the people who were in unhappy relationships, on the days when they reported more physical pain

34、, it was magnified by more emotionalpain.第三條我們學(xué)到的關(guān)于關(guān)系對(duì)我們健康的影響是，良好的關(guān)系不僅只是保護(hù)我們的身體，也能保護(hù)我們的大腦。研究表明，在80歲之后依然處在對(duì)另一個(gè)人安全依戀關(guān)系中是有保護(hù)性的。在關(guān)系中真的感到自己能在需要時(shí)可以依賴另一個(gè)人的人們，他們的保持清晰記憶力的時(shí)間更長(zhǎng)。而感到自己在關(guān)系中真的無法依賴另一個(gè)人的人群，他們將更早出現(xiàn)記憶力衰退。而那些良好的關(guān)系，并不一定要一直保持平順。一些 80-89 歲老年夫婦，他們可能一天到晚都在吵架。但只要他們感到自己真的能在困難時(shí)刻依賴另一個(gè)人時(shí)，他們根本就不會(huì)記得那些爭(zhēng)吵了。所以我們學(xué)到的是

35、，良好、親密的關(guān)系有利于我們的健康和完好狀態(tài)。這是老智慧，是祖母和牧師的忠告。And the 3rd big lesson that we learned about relationships on our health is, that good relationships dont just protect our bodies, they protect our brains. It turns out, that being in a securely attached relationship to another person in your 80s is protective.

36、 And the people who are in a relationship that they really feel that they can count on the other person in times of need, those peoples memories stay shaper longer. And people in a relationship where they feel they really cant count on the other one, those are the people who would experience earlier

37、 memory decline. And those good relationships, they dont have to be smooth all the time. Some of the octogenarian couples could bicker with each other day in and day out. But as long as they felt that they can really count on the other one when they are going out tough, those arguments didnt take a

38、toll on their memories. So, this message, that good, close relationships are good for our health and well-being; this is the wisdom thats as old as the hills. Its your grandmothers advice, and your pastors.為什么明白這個(gè)道理這么難？就拿巨大的財(cái)富來說，我們知道，一旦我們的基本物質(zhì)需求被滿足了，財(cái)富就幫不上什么忙了。如果你從每年掙75,000美元提高到7500萬美元，我們知道你的健康和快樂基本

39、不會(huì)發(fā)生變化。而至于聲望，媒體不斷地入侵和缺乏隱私使得多數(shù)名人顯著地不健康。這顯然不會(huì)讓人更快樂。至于拼命工作，有一條真理說，沒有人在臨死前覺得自己要是花更多時(shí)間在辦公室就好了。為什么這些這么難理解，這么容易就被忽視了？是啊，我們是人啊。我們真正喜歡的是快速解決方案，一種我們能得到的，又能讓我們生活得好并且一直保持下去的東西。關(guān)系錯(cuò)綜復(fù)雜，照顧家人和朋友是繁重的工作，一點(diǎn)也不性感也不光芒萬丈。而這也是終生的，絕無盡頭。在我們的75年研究中擁有最幸福退休生活的人是那些主動(dòng)尋找玩伴來替代工作伙伴的人。正如調(diào)查中的年輕人一樣，我們的研究對(duì)象中很多人在一開始還是青年的時(shí)候，真的相信聲望、財(cái)富以及高成就

40、是他們想要生活得更好就必須追求的。但隨著時(shí)間的流逝，在這75年間，我們的研究顯示：發(fā)展得最好的人是那些把精力投入關(guān)系，尤其是家人、朋友和周圍人群的人。Why is this so hard to get? For example, with respectful wealth, we know that once your basic material needs are met, wealth doesnt do anything. If you go from making 75,000 dollars a year to 75 million, we know that your hea

41、lth and your happiness will change very little, if at all. When it comes to fame, the constant media intrusion and a lack of privacy make most famous people significantly less healthy. It certainly doesnt keep them happier. And as for working harder and harder, there is that truism that nobody on th

42、eir death bed ever wished that they had spent more time in their office. (Laughter)Why is that so hard to get and so easy to ignore? Well, were human. What we really like is a quick fix - something we can get that will keep our lives good and keep them that way. Relationships are messy and they are

43、complicated and they are hard work of tending to family and friends, thats not sexy or glamorous. Its also life-long. It never ends. The people in our 75-year study with the happiest retirement were the people who had actively worked to replace workmates with new playmates. Just like the millennials in that recent survey, many of our men when they were starting out as young adults, really believed that fame and wealth a