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1、Do I Need To Like Myself?|非得喜愛本人嗎？Usually, people with a poor self-image use one of two irritating2 strategies3. They either:a) criticize you a lot or b) they criticize themselves a lot.STRATEGY A: They criticize you a lot. They figure4 that by criticizing other people they can feel better about the

2、mselves.Lets take Fred, who feels inferior5. Fred thinks he has a big nose and piggy eyes. He also secretly feels a bit stupid.So whats his strategy to feel better about himself? He criticizes all his friends. He has names for them like “Flathead”, “Chicken Legs” and “Dogbrain”. Whenever someone els

3、e makes a mistake, he announces it to the whole class. (He probably doesnt even realize he criticizes peopleor why he does it.)If you have parents, friends or brothers and sisters who dont like themselvesthey might criticize you and everyone around them. Just remember that they criticize you because

4、 they have a problem. If you remember that they are actually hurting inside, you wont get so upset by their behaviour.STRATEGY B: Some people who dont like themselves criticize themselves a lot. They use reverse6 psychology.Take Mary who doesnt like herself. Shes always telling you, “You are prettie

5、r than me. You are smarter. Nobody likes me.” Shes hoping that you will reply, “No Mary! You are clever. You are beautiful.” After a while, people like Mary get on your nerves7!In a nutshell8When we dont like ourselves, we irritate other people. We also put ourselves through a lot of stress. When we

6、 accept ourselves a little better, we dont play these games.How Can I Like Myself?In our hearts, most of us believe we should be doing better. We think that we should have gotten higher grades. We want to be popular and hang out with9 the “in”10 crowd. We feel we dont measure up to11 our parents exp

7、ectations. Our parents help to confirm12 this idea when they ask, “Why cant you be more like your brother?”Whenever you are feeling low, be your own best friend. Accept that, up to now, you have lived your life the best way you know how. No one sets out13 to screw up14 their life! Like anyone, youve

8、 done the odd stupid thing. With more information youll likely do better in the future.Liking yourself means forgiving yourself. If you have made some serious mistakes, if you have hurt some peopleand yourselffeeling guilty wont help.If you are feeling guilty about something, you have already suffer

9、ed enough. Being guilty for another six months wont help anybody.Forget perfection and aim for improvementIts a funny thing. When you forgive yourself for your own mistakes, you automatically15 begin to let others off the hook16 for the same things.“But Im Not Brilliant”You might look at yourself an

10、d say, “Im not as beautiful as my sister, Im not as talented as my friends and Im not brilliant at anything! How can I feel good about me?”Fact: Nobody is good at everything and most of us have those thoughts!But heres the lowdown17! Talent and beauty are very usefulbut there are plenty of talented

11、and beautiful people around whom we dont necessarily admire. And some of them are a pan18 in the butt19!The qualities most of us value above all others are honesty, courage, persistence20, generosity21 and humility22. Take a look at this list and youll find something interesting. You arent born with

12、 these things. You develop them. Anyone can have them! If you want self-respect, and respect from others, you dont have to be an Einstein or a super-model. You simply work at developing your own honesty, determination, generosity, humility and courage. It is called “character23”. In a nutshellHow yo

13、u feel about yourself is in your hands.確實(shí)如此！不喜愛本人的人非常厭惡！通常，自我感受不好的人會(huì)采納兩種策略，要么老是挑剔別人，要么總是挑剔本人。策略一：老是挑剔別人。他們以為挑別人的錯(cuò)就能自我感受良好。比方說弗雷德吧，他就覺得本人不如別人。弗雷德感到本人長(zhǎng)了一個(gè)大鼻子、兩只豬眼睛，還暗自感受腦子有點(diǎn)笨。那他想感受好一點(diǎn)如何辦呢？因此就挑所有朋友的缺點(diǎn)，給他們起一些怪名字，什么“平頭”啊，“雞腿”啊，“狗腦”啊等等。每當(dāng)有人犯錯(cuò)誤，他就對(duì)全班同學(xué)宣布。 （他非?？赡軌焊鶅壕蜎]認(rèn)識(shí)到在批判別人，或者為什么要這么做。）假如你父母、朋友或兄弟姊妹不喜愛本人，他

14、們可能挑剔你和四周的每一個(gè)人。請(qǐng)記住，他們挑剔你是由于他們有咨詢題。事實(shí)上他們內(nèi)心有傷痛，記住這一點(diǎn)，你就不會(huì)對(duì)他們的行為感到特別心煩了。策略二：有些不喜愛本人的人老說本人不好。他們的心理正好相反。拿瑪麗來說吧，她就不喜愛本人。她總對(duì)別人說，“你比我美麗。你比我聰明。誰都不喜愛我?！彼齼?nèi)心事實(shí)上希望對(duì)方如此答復(fù)，“不對(duì)，瑪麗！你非常聰明，非常美麗?！辈挥枚嗑茫旣愡@種人就會(huì)令人生厭。簡(jiǎn)言之不喜愛本人，就會(huì)去煩別人。同時(shí)本身也會(huì)承受非常大的壓力。對(duì)本人好一點(diǎn)，就不會(huì)去玩那些煩人的把戲了。怎么樣才能喜愛本人？?jī)?nèi)內(nèi)心，大多數(shù)人都認(rèn)為本人應(yīng)該比如今強(qiáng)。我們認(rèn)為考試分?jǐn)?shù)應(yīng)該再高一些。我們想受人歡迎，跟那

15、些“時(shí)髦的”人在一起。我們感到達(dá)不到父母的期望。父母也證明了這一點(diǎn)。他們會(huì)咨詢，“你就不能向你哥哥多學(xué)一點(diǎn)？”不管何時(shí)你感受不良，你要做本人最親切的朋友。要承認(rèn)到目前為止，你是在以你所知的最正確方式生活。誰都不會(huì)成心破壞本人的生活。你跟別人一樣做了些驚奇而愚蠢的事。你假如明白得多一些，今后就會(huì)做得好一些。喜愛本人意味著原諒本人。假如你犯了嚴(yán)峻的錯(cuò)誤，假如你損害了別人，損害了本人，內(nèi)疚是不管用的。假如你為某事感到內(nèi)疚，你已經(jīng)遭到了足夠的折磨。再內(nèi)疚半年，對(duì)人對(duì)己都無濟(jì)于事。不記得完善，立志改善這是非常有趣的一件事。一旦你原諒本人的過錯(cuò)，就會(huì)自動(dòng)不再追查別人同樣的錯(cuò)誤?！暗俏也环浅３錾蹦阋苍S會(huì)將本人審視一番，說，“我沒姐姐那么美麗，也沒朋友那么聰明，我哪方面都不出色！叫我如何感受良好？”事實(shí)是：沒