讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)親情類一碗陽(yáng)春面講義高考英語(yǔ)作文復(fù)習(xí)專項(xiàng)

高考讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)|親情類閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫(xiě)兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。續(xù)寫(xiě)的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右。Jennywastheonlychildinherhome.Shehadaquarrelwithhermotherthatafternoonandsheranoutofthehouseangrily.Shecouldn'thelpweepingwhenshethoughtofthescolding(責(zé)罵)

fromhermother.Havingwanderedinthestreetforhours,shefeltalittlehungryandwishedforsomethingtoeat.Shestoodbesideastandforawhile,

watchingthemiddleagedsellerbusydoinghisbusiness.However,withnomoneyinhand,shesighed

(嘆氣)

andhadtoleave.Thesellerbehindthestand(攤位)

noticedtheyounggirlandasked,"Hey,girl,youwanttohavethenoodles?""Oh,yes...butIdon'thavemoneyonme,"shereplied.“That'snothing.I'lltreatyoutoday,"saidtheman."

ein."Thesellerbroughtherabowlofnoodles,whosesmellwassoattractive.Asshewaseating,

Jennycriedsilently.“Whatisit?"

askedthemankindly.“Nothing,actuallyIwasjusttouchedbyyourkindness!"

saidJenny."

Evenastrangeronthestreetwillgivemeabowlofnoodles,whilemymotherdrovemeoutofthehouse.

Sheshowednocareforme.Sheissomerciless(殘忍的)

paredtoastranger!"Hearingthewords,thesellersmiled,"Girl,

doyoureallythinkso?Ionlygaveyouabowlofnoodlesandyouthankedmealot.Butitisyourmotherwhohasraisedyousinceyouwereababy.Canyounumberthetimesshecookedforyou?Haveyouexpressedyourgratitude（感激）toher?"Jennysatthere,speechlessandnumbwithshock;sherememberedMother'sfamiliarfaceandweathered(飽經(jīng)風(fēng)霜的)

hands."

WhydidInotthinkofthat?Abowlofnoodlesfromastrangermademefeelgrateful,butIhaveneverthankedmymumforwhatshehasdoneforme."Onthewayhome,Jennymadeuphermindtomakeanapologytohermotherforherrudenessassoonasshearrivedhome.Paragraph1:Nearingthedoorway,Jennytookadeepbreath.Paragraph2:Agentletouchonherhaircalledhermindback.故事解讀：Jenny和她母親大吵一架之后，生氣出走，在路上閑蕩，饑餓難耐地看著路邊的小販做著面條生意，因?yàn)闆](méi)錢(qián)只能嘆息離開(kāi)，善良的小販卻叫住了她并免費(fèi)請(qǐng)Jenny吃了碗面條，Jenny甚是感動(dòng)，覺(jué)得陌生人都對(duì)自己這么好，而自己的母親卻是經(jīng)常斥責(zé)她。小販點(diǎn)醒了Jenny，是她自己的母親每天都在為她做飯，是她自己的母親撫養(yǎng)她長(zhǎng)大，卻從未向母親表示過(guò)感激之情，Jenny倍感羞愧，決心為自己的態(tài)度向母親道歉。內(nèi)容上：大部分同學(xué)能做到情節(jié)設(shè)定合理，符合故事發(fā)展的邏輯順序。亮點(diǎn)內(nèi)容有，在續(xù)寫(xiě)第一段寫(xiě)到Jenny回到家中，看到桌上放著母親已經(jīng)做好的一碗面條；補(bǔ)充了Jenny和母親爭(zhēng)吵的原因。在第二段Jenny為表示感激之情，為母親下了一碗面條，最后情感升華。而個(gè)別同學(xué)存在的問(wèn)題，第一段結(jié)尾和第二段段首銜接不上，Jenny思緒既沒(méi)飄走，母親也出現(xiàn)在了第一段中，這樣的情節(jié)設(shè)置稍有不當(dāng)，且篇幅有限，不好創(chuàng)設(shè)新的情境。寫(xiě)作思路：

梳理人物情節(jié)情緒時(shí)，引導(dǎo)學(xué)生關(guān)注Jenny從“生氣”到“羞愧”的變化，使之理解母愛(ài)的真正含義，推知故事主題（understandingmother’slove）和寫(xiě)作目的（improvingtherelationshipbetweenparentsandchildren），進(jìn)而推斷故事結(jié)局。

通過(guò)問(wèn)題幫助學(xué)生搭建第一段寫(xiě)作思路。例如：

(1)WhatwouldJennydonext?

(2)WhydidJennytakeadeepbreath?

(3)WhatdidJennythinkinhermind?

問(wèn)題(1)(2)主要根據(jù)第一段提示句進(jìn)行推斷，問(wèn)題(3)根據(jù)第二段提示句推導(dǎo)Jenny的思緒，三個(gè)問(wèn)題為學(xué)生搭建續(xù)寫(xiě)第一段結(jié)構(gòu)框架即內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)——knockedatoropenedthedoor/whatshesaw/whatshethought。范文一Nearingthedoorway,Jennytookadeepbreath.

Notknowingwhat

wouldhappennext,Jenny,gatheringhercourage,pushedthedoor

open,

onlytofindtherewasnobodyhome.Anxietybegantocreepuponher."WhereismyMom?Isshestillstillangrywithme?",Jennycouldn'thelp

thinkingaboutallthese.Havingwanderedoutsideforawholeday,Jenny

feltabittired.Sittingonthesofa,shebegantoshedtearsofregret,lostin

deepthought.Agentletouchonherhaircalledhermindback.

Raisingherhead,Jenny

foundhermotherstandingbehindher."Mom,Iamsorry.Ishouldn'thave

beensorudetoyou.Iknowfullywellallthatyoudidwasforme."Jenny

said,withtearsalreadyfallingdownhercheeks."It'sfinethatyouareback!I

havebeenlookingforyoueverywhere."mothersaid.Deeplymoved,Jenny

threwherselfathermotherandtheyhuggedtightly.Itwasnotuntilthat

momentthatJennyrealizedthatwhateverhappened,hermotherwould

alwaysbethereforher!范文二Nearingthedoorway,Jennytookadeepbreath.Whenshepushedthedooropenandenteredthehouse,shefoundhermotherwasnotin.Tiredandsad,shesankdownontothesofa.“Wherecouldmymotherbe?”shewondered.“Wasshestillangrywithme?”Again,thesceneofthequarrelappearedinhermind.Sherememberedherrudenesstohermother.Realizingthatallthescoldingfromhermotherwasduetothefactthathermotherreallycaredalotabouther,sheratherfeltashamed,andtearsbegantorolldownhercheeks.Agentletouchonherhaircalledhermindback.

sheraisedherheadandsawthefamiliarfaceofhermother.“Hereyoue!I'vebeenlookingforyou.”shesaid,tiredandrelieved.Jennycouldn'thelpthrowingherselfintohermother'sarms.“Mum,I'msosorryandthankyouforallyouhavedoneforme.”Sheexpressedhersincereapologyandgreatgratitude.Hearingthis,hermothersmiled,pattingherbackgently.

范文三Approachingthedoorway,Jennytookadeepbreath.

Withpalmssweatingandthroattightening,sheopenedthedooratlast.“Mom,”shesaidweakly.However,nobodyanswered.Shecouldn’tfindhermotheranywhereathome.Whathermotherdidforhersprangupinhermind,likecookingforher,washingherclothesandsoon.Heartbeatingpainfullyandbangingagainstherribs,shewasstruckdeadwithregretduetotakingMother’sloveforgrantedandforgettingtoconveytimelygratitude.Theideathatit’snevertoolatetomakeasincereapologyhither.Agentletouchonherhaircalledhermindback.

Raisingherheadup,Jennycaughtsightofafamiliarface.Itwasherbelovedmotherthatlookeddirectlyintohereyeswitharadiantsmile.Urgedbytheforcetorightthewrong,shespokeupwithafirmtone,“Mom,I’mdeeplysorryformyrudeness.Itwon’thappenagain!Ipromise!Wouldyouforgiveme?”Shecouldfeeltearswellingupinhereyes.“Youarealwaysmylittlegirl!”MomeyedJennytenderly.Asthesettingsuncastagoldenglowonbothoftheirfaces,theyembracedeachothertightly.Andthen,handinhand,theysteppedintothehouse.范文四Nearingthedoorway,Jennytookadeepbreath.Notknowingwhatwouldhappennext,Jenny,gatheringhercourage,pushedthedooropen,onlytofindtherewasnobodyhome.Anxietybegantocreepuponher"WhereismyMom?Isshestillstillangrywithme?",Jennycouldn'thelpthinkingaboutallthese.