【公開課課件】讀后續(xù)寫課件高一英語寫作專題

EnglishWritingCourseContinuationWriting考情分析浙江省5年10次高考（2016-2021）8次讀后續(xù)寫（2016.10，2017.6，2017.11，2018.6，2020.1，2020.7，2021.1，2021.6）2次概要寫作（2018.11，2019.6）考續(xù)寫可能性較大；考概要寫作可能性較小考概要平均分相對較低，140以上高分較少同一屆兩次作文形式保持一致可能性較大讀后續(xù)寫與概要寫作，兩種形式在不同考次不定期交替使用《普通高等學(xué)校招生全國統(tǒng)一考試英語科考試說明》（高考綜合改革試驗省份試用）8次讀后續(xù)寫考試2016.102017.62017.112018.62020.12020.72021.12021.6語篇模式問題解決問題解決拉波夫敘事模式問題解決問題解決問題解決問題解決問題解決主題叢林冒險狼口脫險家庭旅行騎馬迷路家庭親情熊爪余生南瓜卡頭家庭責(zé)任環(huán)境叢林迷路公路騎自行車駕車旅行帳篷農(nóng)場小狗家庭研究基地拍照萬圣節(jié)南瓜打工賺錢拉潑夫敘事模式拉波夫是美國語言學(xué)家，是社會語言學(xué)的代表人物之一，他提出了源于社會語言學(xué)的敘事語篇模式。拉波夫把完整的敘事結(jié)構(gòu)分為點題、指向、進展、評議、結(jié)局、回應(yīng)六個部分。“點題”即概括故事大意，強調(diào)用一句話概括故事發(fā)生了什么，并引發(fā)讀者的閱讀興趣，“點題”除了出現(xiàn)在文章首段，也通常是文章的標(biāo)題;“指向”是故事的時間、地點、人物及背景，是對事件發(fā)生的鋪墊，而不是事件本身;“進展”是按事件的先后順序呈現(xiàn)的內(nèi)容，也占據(jù)了文章最大的篇幅;“評議”滲透在全文中，是作者或故事中人物對事件的看法和態(tài)度，可以用來制造懸念，提高讀者的閱讀興趣，增強故事的感染力;“結(jié)局”是故事的完結(jié)，但并不是所有的記敘文都有結(jié)局;“回應(yīng)”是故事與現(xiàn)實生活連接的紐帶，是故事對讀者的啟迪或意義，其作用是點明主旨，升華主題。值得注意的是，并不是所有記敘文都包含了以上六個要素，缺少一個或兩個是十分常見的。拉波夫認為：“一個完整的敘事模式以點題和指向開始，以進展為主體，用評議烘托氣氛，以結(jié)局結(jié)束情節(jié)，最后用回應(yīng)將讀者拉回現(xiàn)實。讀后續(xù)寫評分原則1.本試題總分為25分，按5個檔次給分。2.評分時，先根據(jù)所續(xù)寫短文的內(nèi)容和語言初步確定其所屬檔次，然后以該檔次的要求來衡量，確定或調(diào)整，最后給分。3.詞數(shù)少于130的，從總分中減去2分。4.評分時，應(yīng)主要從以下四個方面考慮：

（1）與所給短文及段落開頭語的銜接程度；

（2）內(nèi)容的豐富性和對所標(biāo)出的關(guān)鍵詞語的應(yīng)用情況；

（3）應(yīng)用語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯的豐富性和準(zhǔn)確性；

（4）上下文的連貫性。5.拼寫與標(biāo)點符號是語言準(zhǔn)確性的一個重要方面，評分時，應(yīng)視其對交際的影響程度予以考慮。6.如書寫較差一致影響交際，可將分數(shù)降低一個檔次。讀后續(xù)寫評分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)檔次描述第五檔（21-25分）與所給短文融洽度高，與所提供各段落開頭語銜接合理；內(nèi)容豐富，應(yīng)用了5個以上短文中標(biāo)出的關(guān)鍵詞語；所使用語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯豐富、準(zhǔn)確，可能有些許錯誤，但完全不影響意義表達；有效地使用了語句間的連接成分，使所續(xù)寫短文結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊。第四檔（16-20分）與所給短文融洽度較高，與所提供各段落開頭語銜接較為合理；內(nèi)容比較豐富，應(yīng)用了5個以上短文中標(biāo)出的關(guān)鍵詞語；所使用語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯較為豐富、準(zhǔn)確，可能有些許錯誤，但不影響意義表達；比較有效地使用了語句間的連接成分，使所續(xù)寫短文結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊。第三檔（11-15分）與所給短文關(guān)系較為密切，與所提供各段落開頭語有一定程度的銜接；寫出了若干有關(guān)內(nèi)容，應(yīng)用了4個以上短文中標(biāo)出的關(guān)鍵詞語；應(yīng)用的語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯能滿足任務(wù)的要求，雖有一些錯誤，但不影響意義表達；應(yīng)用簡單的語句間的連接成分，使全文內(nèi)容連貫。第二檔（6-10分）與所給短文有一定的關(guān)系，與所提供各段落開頭有一定程度的銜接；寫出了一些有關(guān)內(nèi)容，應(yīng)用了3個以上短文中標(biāo)出的關(guān)鍵詞語；語法結(jié)構(gòu)單調(diào)，詞匯有限，有些語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯方面的錯誤，影響了意義表達；較少使用語句間的連接成分，全文內(nèi)容缺少連貫性。第一檔（1-5分）與所給短文和開頭語的銜接較差；產(chǎn)出內(nèi)容太少，很少使用短文中標(biāo)出的關(guān)鍵詞語；語法結(jié)構(gòu)單調(diào)，詞匯有限，有較多語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯方面的錯，嚴重影響了意義表達；缺乏語句間的連接成分，全文內(nèi)容不連貫。0分白卷、內(nèi)容太少無法評判或所寫內(nèi)容與所提供內(nèi)容無關(guān)。第五檔（21-25分）與所給短文融洽度高，與所提供各段落開頭語銜接合理；內(nèi)容豐富，應(yīng)用了5個以上短文中標(biāo)出的關(guān)鍵詞語；所使用語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯豐富、準(zhǔn)確，可能有些許錯誤，但完全不影響意義表達；有效地使用了語句間的連接成分，使所續(xù)寫短文結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊。感受真題(浙江2017.6)

Onabright,warmJulyafternoon,MacHollan,aprimaryschoolteacher,wascyclingfromhishometoAlaskawithhisfriends.Oneofhisfriendshadtostoptomakeabicycle

repair,buttheyhadencouragedMactocarryon,andtheywouldcatchupwithhimsoon.AsMacpedaled

(騎行)

alongalone,hethoughtfondlyofhiswifeandtwoyoungdaughtersathome.Hehopedtoshowthemthisbeautifulplacesomeday．ThenMacheardquickandloudbreathingbehindhim.“Man,that'sabigdog!”hethought.Butwhenhelookedtotheside,hesawinstantlythatitwasn’tadogatall,butawolf,quicklycatchingupwithhim．Mac'sheartjumped.Hefoundouthiscanofbearspray.Withonehandonthebars,hefiredthesprayatthewolf.Abrightredcloudenvelopedtheanimal,andtoMac’srelief,itfellback,shakingitshead.Butaminutelater,itwasbyhissideagain.ThenitattackedthebackofMac'sbike,tearingopenhistentbag.Hefiredatthewolfasecondtime,andagain,itfellbackonlytoquicklyrestartthechase(追趕)．Macwaspedalinghardnow.Hewavedandyelledatpassingcarsbutwascarefulnottoslowdown.Hesawasteepuphillclimbbeforehim.Heknewthatoncehehitthehill,he'dbeeasycaughtupandthewolf’steethwouldbetearingintohisflesh．Atthismoment,Paul

andBeckyweredrivingtheircarontheirwaytoAlaska.Theydidn'tthinkmuchofitwhentheysawtwocyclistsrepairingtheirbikeonthesideoftheroad.Abitlater,theyspottedwhatthey,too,assumedwasadogrunningalongsideamanonabike.Astheygotcloser,theyrealizedthatthedogwasawolf.Macheardalargevehiclebehindhim.Hepulledinfrontofitasthewolfwascatchingupfast,justadozenyardsawaynow．注意：1．所續(xù)寫短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；2．應(yīng)使用5個以上短文中標(biāo)有下劃線的關(guān)鍵詞語；3．續(xù)寫部分分為兩段，每段的開頭語已為你寫好；4．續(xù)寫完成后，請用下劃線標(biāo)出你所使用的關(guān)鍵詞語．paragraph1:Thecarabruptlystoppedinfrontofhim.

paragraph2:

Afewminuteslater,theothertwocyclistsarrived.

閱讀文本分析時間when地點where人物who起因reason經(jīng)過process結(jié)果resultJulyafternoonfromhishometoAlaska

Mac&2friends,Paul&BeckyAwolfwasfollowing????人物分析MacAprimaryschoolteachercyclingalongtheroadaloneawolffollowinghimhappyandexcitedFrightenedandworried故事發(fā)展與結(jié)局PaulandBeckydrivingParagraph1?Paragraph2?1.合乎人物性格及故事發(fā)展邏輯2.結(jié)局圓滿，弘揚正能量3.注意字數(shù)，兩段盡量平均分配Version1Paragraph1:Thecarabruptlystoppedinfrontofhim.“Comeon,getinthecar.”Paulshoutedandopenedthedoor.Macjumpedoffthebikeandslidintothecarwithouthesitationasthewolfwasabouttotearhimintopieces.Whatanarrowescape!Thewolfwasgone.ThoughMacwassafe,hestillfeltthedreadstoppingthepassageofairintohislung,andhislegstrembling.Afterafewminutes,hesuddenlyshouted,“OhmyGod,myfriendsarestillrepairingthebicycle”Beingenormouslyworried,theydecidedtowaitforthematthespot.Version1Paragraph2:Afewminuteslater,theothertwocyclistsarrived.“ThankGod,it'snicetoseeyouagain.Didyouseeit?”Macheldhistwofriendstightlyinarms.“IspottedabigdogrunningontheroadwhenIwasriding,andthenIfiguredoutitwasawolf.”ThenMacsaidinarelaxingtone,“Withouttheirhelp,Iwouldbethedinnerofthewolf,sodon'tletmepedalaloneagain!”Theyalllaughedabouttheaccident,then

gotbackonroad.HowMacmissedhiswifeandchildren!Hecouldn'twaittosharethisexcitingexperiencewiththem.Version2Paragraph1:Thecarabruptlystoppedinfrontofhim.“Getintothecar!”yelledPaul,openingthedoorforhim.Mac

jumpedoffthebicycle,threwhimselfintothecarandshutthedoorimmediately.“Thankyousomuch!”Macwasalmostoutofbreath.Justatthatmoment,thewolfappeared,showingitsshiningsharpteethatthem.Thethreeinthecarwerewonderingwhattodonextwhenthewolfbegantearingthebicycleandthethingstiedtoit.Version2Paragraph2:

Afewminuteslater,theothertwocyclistsarrived.ObviouslyMac’sfriendsalsorealizedwhatwashappeningandarmedthemselveswithsticksandstones,readytofight.Thefuriouscreatureduckeditshead,glaringatthemwithburningeyes.

Suddenly,asharphonkblewandallthecarlightsflashedviolently.Theanimalwasfinallyfrightenedandfledaway.ItwasPaulwhopressedthebuttonsinthecar!Havingexpressedtheirappreciation,Macandhisfriendswavedgood-byetothetwokindyoungpeople.NowMaccouldhardlywaittoreturnhomeandtellhisfamilythethrillingstory.與所給短文的銜接和融洽必須根據(jù)所給段落的段首句，構(gòu)思故事情節(jié)的發(fā)展，兩個段首句要兼顧。不可生搬硬套，避免銜接不當(dāng)，過渡不自然。Paragraph1:Thecarabruptlystoppedinfrontofhim.“Comeon,getinthecar.”Paulshoutedandopenedthedoor.Paragraph1:Thecarabruptlystoppedinfrontofhim.“Getintothecar!”yelledPaul,openingthedoorforhim.Version1Version2與所給短文的銜接和融洽必須根據(jù)所給段落的段首句，構(gòu)思故事情節(jié)的發(fā)展，兩個段首句要兼顧。不可生搬硬套，避免銜接不當(dāng)，過渡不自然。Paragraph2:Afewminuteslater,theothertwocyclistsarrived.“ThankGod,it'snicetoseeyouagain.Didyouseeit?”Macheldhistwofriendstightlyinarms.Paragraph2:

Afewminuteslater,theothertwocyclistsarrived.ObviouslyMac’sfriendsalsorealizedwhatwashappeningandarmedthemselveswithsticksandstones,readytofight.Version1Version2語句間的連接功能舉例時間firstofall,next,then,later,atthattime/moment,suddenly,allofasudden,beforelong,afterwards,intheend,atlast,eventually…轉(zhuǎn)折but,however,onthecontrary,nevertheless,instead,unfortunately因果because,since,thanksto,owingto,asaresultof,forthereasonthat讓步though,although,evenif/though,despite,inspiteofthefactthat條件if,unless,aslongas,onconditionthat,onlyif…五個以上關(guān)鍵詞首先推薦使用名詞，根據(jù)往年的閱卷反饋，名詞單復(fù)數(shù)變化和動詞時態(tài)變化可計入下劃線詞；但是詞性變化不計入下劃線詞Mac;Paul;bicycle;wolf;friends;home;car;climbjump;pedal一定不要忘記在續(xù)寫文中用下劃線標(biāo)出所使用的關(guān)鍵詞。語法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯豐富、準(zhǔn)確語法被動強調(diào)倒裝省略虛擬It用法非謂句子主句祈使句簡單句并列句功能結(jié)構(gòu)復(fù)合句疑問句感嘆句從句狀從定從名從陳述句句子結(jié)構(gòu)/功能三大從句定語從句狀語從句名詞性從句限制性定語從句非限制性定語從句時間，地點，原因，條件，讓步，結(jié)果，目的…主語從句，賓語從句，表語從句，同位語從句狀語從句Macjumpedoffthebikeandslidintothecarwithouthesitationasthewolfwasabouttotearhimintopieces.ThoughMacwassafe,hestillfeltthedreadstoppingthepassageofairintohislung,andhislegstrembling.Thethreeinthecarwerewonderingwhattodonextwhenthewolfbegantearingthebicycleandthethingstiedtoit.定語從句“IspottedabigdogrunningontheroadwhenIwasriding,andthenIfiguredoutitwasawolf.”“Ispottedabigdogthat/whichwasrunningontheroadwhenIwasriding,andthenIfiguredoutitwasawolf.”Thethreeinthecarwerewonderingwhattodonextwhenthewolfbegantearingthebicycleandthethingstiedtoit.Thethreewhowereinthecarwerewonderingwhattodonextwhenthewolfbegantearingthebicycleandthethingsthatweretiedtoit.名詞性從句Mac’sfriendsalsorealizedwhatwashappeningandarmedthemselveswithsticksandstones,readytofight.“IspottedabigdogrunningontheroadwhenIwasriding,andthenIfiguredoutitwasawolf.”其他句型HowMacmissedhiswifeandchildren!ItwasPaulwhopressedthebuttonsinthecar!Withouttheirhelp,Iwouldbethedinnerofthewolf.感嘆句強調(diào)句虛擬句非謂語（短語）Thefuriouscreatureduckeditshead,glaringatthemwithburningeyes.Thewolfappeared,showingitsshiningsharpteethatthem.Macjumpedoffthebicycle,threwhimselfintothecarandshutthedoorimmediately.“Getintothecar!”yelledPaul,openingthedoorforhim.連續(xù)動作有先后順序不宜使用非謂語動詞“語”眾不同之形容詞做狀語又累又困，他很快就入睡了。Becausehewastiredandsleepy,hefellasleepquickly.Hewastiredandsleepyandfellasleepquickly.Tiredandsleepy,hefellasleepquickly.形容詞做原因狀語“語”眾不同之形容詞做狀語Eric終于到了山頂，饑餓而又興奮Ericfinallyreachedthetopofthemountain,andhewashungrybutexcited.形容詞做結(jié)果狀語Ericfinallyreachedthetopofthemountain,hungrybutexcited.“語”眾不同之形容詞做狀語Mary迷失在森林里，她坐在一棵樹下，充滿恐懼與絕望。Marywaslostintheforest,soshesatunderatreeandwasfulloffearanddespair.形容詞短語做原因狀語Marywaslostintheforest,soshesatunderatree,fulloffearanddespair.Lostintheforest,Marysatunderatree,fulloffearanddespair.形容詞短語做伴隨狀語“語”眾不同之非謂語做狀語他贏得了比賽，他的父母很開心。Hewonthematchandmadehisparentsdelighted.Hewonthematch,makinghisparentsdelighted.現(xiàn)在分詞短語做結(jié)果狀語“語”眾不同之非謂語做狀語Tom被老師責(zé)罵，一下子哭了出來。Tomwasscoldedbytheteacherandheburstoutcrying.Scoldedbytheteacher,Tomburstoutcrying.過去分詞短語做原因狀語走了很長一段時間后，她發(fā)現(xiàn)自己迷路了。Afterwalkingforquitealongtime,shefoundherselflost.Aftershewalkedforquitealongtime,shefoundherselflost.Havingwalkedforquitealongtime,shefoundherselflost.Shehadwalkedforquitealongtimeandfoundherselflost.“語”眾不同之非謂語做狀語現(xiàn)在分詞完成式做時間狀語“語”眾不同之with復(fù)合結(jié)構(gòu)做狀語Smith先生出去散步，燈還亮著Mr.Smithwentoutforawalkandthelightwasstillon.Mr.Smithwentoutforawalkwiththelightstillon.With復(fù)合結(jié)構(gòu)做結(jié)果狀語“語”眾不同之with復(fù)合結(jié)構(gòu)做狀語她從屋里沖了出來，淚水模糊了眼睛。Sherushedoutoftheroomandtearsblurredhereyes.Sherushedoutoftheroomwithtearsblurringhereyes.With復(fù)合結(jié)構(gòu)做伴隨狀語“語”眾不同之倒裝句女孩從屋里沖了出來，淚水模糊了眼睛。Thegirlrushedoutoftheroomandtearsblurredhereyes.Outoftheroomrushedth