2022年廣東深圳二模英語讀后續(xù)寫試題解析及范文講解課件（守護綠色公園）

讀后續(xù)寫2022深圳二模ContinuationWriting第二節(jié)（滿分

25分）

閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。OnahotSeptemberafternoon,PeterandhisfriendIsabelwereontheirwaytothelibrary.WhentheypassedbyTubmanpark,Isabelsuggestedcuttingthroughittogettothelibrary.Astheyenteredthepark,thesightoftheswings(秋千)andthemerry-go-roundbroughtbackafloodofmemoriesoftheirchildhoodspentthere.Butnoweverythinglookedsoold,sad,anddirty.Litterlayonthegroundnexttoanoverflowingtrashbin.Therewerestillyoungschoolchildrenplayingtherebuttheyhadtoavoidthetrashthatlitteredtheplayground.Alittleboytoldthemthatthecitytooktheothertrashcansawayandtheremainingonenevergotemptiedoften.Astheyheadedtowardthelibrary,thetwohighschoolstudentswrinkledtheirforehead.Inthelibrary,theyencounteredMrs.Evans,theirkind-heartedfifth-gradeteacher,retiredyetstillpassionate.Mrs.EvanslistenedasIsabelandPetereagerlyexplainedwhatthey’dseen.Finally,sherecommendedthemtogototheCityHalltovoicetheirconcerns.Thenextday,IsabelandPeterwentintothebuildingoftheCityHallbutweremetwithanimpatientofficer.Theywereinformedthatthecitycouldn’thelpwiththeirproblemduetoatightbudget.Discouraged,theyleftandturnedtoMrs.Evansforhelp.Underherguidance,theydecidedtoaskGoGreen,anon-profitorganizationwhosegoalistoprotecttheenvironment,forhelp.“Thisgroupisgoodatraisingmoneyforprojectsjustlikeyours,”saidMrs.Evans.ShepromisedtoarrangethemtopresenttheirideastoGoGreen.Hearingthis,theirfacelitup.Twomaintasksremainedahead:researchingwaystocleanuptheparkandpreparingaconvincingpresentation.AsIsabelwasgoodatresearchingwhilePeteralwayshadatalentforspeaking,theycooperatedquitewell.Isabellearnedfromasciencemagazinethatanewtypeoftrashbincansqueezethetrashdownwithoutbeingemptiedoften,whichsavestime,money,andenergy.Basedonthis,Peterpracticedhispresentationoverandoveragain.注意：1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應為150左右；2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應位置作答。Aweeklater,PeterstoodnervouslyatthebackofthehallwhereGoGreenwasmeeting.______________________________________________________________________Afterthemeeting,IsabelexcitedlytoldPeterthegoodnews.____________________________________________題型分析：這篇文章是個記敘文。本題是續(xù)寫部分圍繞兩名高中生為守護記憶中的綠色公園，嘗試說服說服當?shù)氐姆怯M織GoGreen籌集資金保護他們兒時的公園環(huán)境而展開。這樣的話題非常符合高考對于“人與社會——環(huán)境保護”主題語境的考查。但是，真正參加這樣的非營利性組織的環(huán)?；顒拥耐瑢W還是有限的，因此本題難度較大，同學們既要關(guān)注續(xù)寫故事的合理性又要關(guān)注自己的語言點。StorywhenwherewhowhathowwhyinhotSeptemberpark,library,atthebackofthehallPeter，IsabelandtheirretiredteacherMrs.EvansPeterandIsabelfoundtheparkwasnotcleananylongerandtriedtochangethesituationwithMrs.Evans’shelp.Thecitywouldnothelpwiththeirproblemduetoatightbudget.

1.淺層信息理解

首先要審題：⑴體裁：_______；⑵人稱：_______________；⑶主體時態(tài)：____________；主題語境：__________________。記敘文第三人稱一般過去時人與自然之環(huán)境保護一、準確理解材料，理清人物事件

2.深層信息理解①理清故事的發(fā)展線索（How）PARAGRAPH（段落）Behaviors（行為）Topic（段意）passedby，entered，broughtback，lookedsoold,sad,anddirty，lay，hadtoavoid，tookawayPeterandIsabelpassedbyTubmanparkandfoundthatlitterlayaround.Para.12.深層信息理解①理清故事的發(fā)展線索（How）PARAGRAPH（段落）Behaviors（行為）Topic（段意）wrinkled，encountered，recommended，wentinto，couldn’thelp，turnedto，presenttheirideastoGoGreen，litupTheirretiredteacherMrs.EvansofferedthemcertaintipstoraisemoneyfortheTubmanpark.Para.2—42.深層信息理解①理清故事的發(fā)展線索（How）PARAGRAPH（段落）Behaviors（行為）Topic（段意）wasgoodatresearching，hadatalentforspeaking，cooperated，cansqueezedown，savesPeterandIsabelmadegoodpreparationsforcleaningupthepark.Para.6…WhentheypassedbyTubmanpark,Isabelsuggestedcuttingthroughittogettothelibrary.Astheyenteredthepark,thesightoftheswings(秋千)andthemerry-go-roundbroughtbackafloodofmemoriesoftheirchildhoodspentthere.Butnoweverythinglookedsoold,sad,anddirty.Litterlayonthegroundnexttoanoverflowingtrashbin.…Alittleboytoldthemthatthecitytooktheothertrashcansawayandtheremainingonenevergotemptiedoften.②挖掘故事情節(jié)和情感續(xù)寫伏筆，后續(xù)故事一定會發(fā)生某不喜悅之事ShowingthatbothPeterandIsabelhadagoodmemoryhere,whichhintsthedevelopmentofthestoryThecontrastbetweentheirmemoryandthefactmakesthemdecidetodosth.Themainproblemoccurs沖突1，暗指后續(xù)故事一定會出現(xiàn)一系列解決舉措…thetwohighschoolstudentswrinkledtheirforehead.Inthelibrary,theyencounteredMrs.Evans,theirkind-heartedfifth-gradeteacher,retiredyetstillpassionate.Mrs.EvanslistenedasIsabelandPetereagerlyexplainedwhatthey’dseen.Finally,...…Theywereinformedthatthecitycouldn’thelpwiththeirproblemduetoatightbudget.Discouraged,theyleftandturnedtoMrs.Evansforhelp.②挖掘故事情節(jié)和情感indicatingtheirdownspiritsindicatingthattheywillgethelpfromtheirteacherindicatingthey’reenthusiasticindicatingtheirdownspirits沖突2，暗指后續(xù)故事一定會出現(xiàn)其他解決舉措Underherguidance,theydecidedtoaskGoGreen,anon-profitorganizationwhosegoalistoprotecttheenvironment,forhelp.“Thisgroupisgoodatraisingmoneyforprojectsjustlikeyours,”saidMrs.Evans.ShepromisedtoarrangethemtopresenttheirideastoGoGreen.Hearingthis,theirfacelitup.…AsIsabelwasgoodatresearchingwhilePeteralwayshadatalentforspeaking,….Peterpracticedhispresentationoverandoveragain.②挖掘故事情節(jié)和情感Thesolutiontothesecondconflictwasfoundindicatingshe’senthusiasticandhelpfulindicatingthey’reenthusiasticandhelpful為故事續(xù)寫最終沖突最終成功解決做好了鋪墊3.整合本篇的故事情節(jié)和情感線索：

九月份的一個下午，比特和伊莎貝爾一起去圖書館，途徑他們兒時的公園，發(fā)現(xiàn)曾經(jīng)干凈的地方變得非常糟糕，垃圾到處都是，在退休老師伊萬建議下，他們?nèi)フ块T尋求幫助，但是被告知因為財政緊張不能解決公園的問題。老師又給他們介紹了非盈利組織GoGreen。為了說服該組織籌集資金，他們做了充分的準備……二、分析續(xù)寫段首，確定續(xù)寫方向

由第一段首句內(nèi)容“Aweeklater,PeterstoodnervouslyatthebackofthehallwhereGoGreenwasmeeting.”（一周之后，彼特緊張地站在了GoGreen即將集會的大廳的后面。）可知，彼特要開始他的游說了。設問如下：①Whichwordsorphrasesshouldbefocusedon?(stoodnervously)②WhatdidPeterdotoavoidhisnervousness?③WhatdidPeterpresentatthemeeting？④Howdidheperformonthestage?二、分析續(xù)寫段首，確定續(xù)寫方向

由第二段首句Afterthemeeting,IsabelexcitedlytoldPeterthegoodnews.(會議之后，伊莎貝爾興奮地告訴了彼特這個好消息。)可知，這一段將主要描述會議之后的情節(jié)。設問如下：⑤Whichwordsorphrasesshouldbefocusedon?(excitedlytold，goodnews)⑥Whatwasthegoodnews?⑦HowwouldtheirteacherandPeterreacttotheirbehavour?⑧Whatwastheresult？

根據(jù)六要素和自己的想象，借助文本資源，創(chuàng)設續(xù)寫兩段故事的情節(jié)。[開端]彼特緊張地站在集會大廳。[故事發(fā)展]試著緩解緊張神經(jīng)→伊莎貝爾鼓勵彼特→談論了公園的糟糕狀況→評委們似乎對彼得項目很感興趣。[結(jié)局]GoGreen已經(jīng)同意捐款，伊莎貝爾把好消息告訴了彼得→老師代表GoGreen詢問彼特和伊莎貝爾是否愿意做志愿者。三、運用和原文相一致的語言風格組織續(xù)寫情節(jié)四、高分范文Aweeklater,PeterstoodnervouslyatthebackofthehallwhereGoGreenwasmeeting.①Closinghiseyesandtakingadeepbreath,Petertriedtorelaxhistension.②“Takeiteasy,Peter!Ibelieveyoucanmakeit.”Isabelwinkedathimandencouragedhim.ItwasjustthenthatPeterheardhisnamecalledtomakeapresentation.③Hestrodeontothehallstageandstartedhisdetaileddescriptionofthedilemma,expressinghisworriesabouttheTubmanParkandofferingtheirresearchabouttheadvancedtrashcans.④SeeminglyquiteinterestedinPeter’spassionateproject,thejudgessmiledandnoddedfromtimetotime.四、高分范文Afterthemeeting,IsabelexcitedlytoldPeterthegoodnews.GoGreenhadagreedtodonatemoneytobuytheadvancedtrashcansforthepark!Hearingtheinspiringnews,theybothleapedintotheairwithjoy.⑤Whatwasmoreexcitingwasthattheywouldgofurthertofindwhatelsetheycoulddotomaketheparkmorepicturesqueforthelocals.⑥BeforetheycouldsharethethrillingnewswithMrs.Evans,Peter’sphonerang.⑦ItwasfromMrs.Evans,whowascallingtoaskPeterandIsabeliftheywerewillingtoworkasvolunteersforGoGreenonbehalfoftheorganization.五、高分范文英譯中

一周之后，彼特緊張地站在了GoGreen即將集會的大廳的后面。閉上眼睛，深呼吸，彼特試著緩解他緊張的神經(jīng)。“放輕松，彼特。我相信你可以做到的?！币辽悹柍颂卣Ａ苏Ｑ劬?/p>