2025年1月浙江高考首考英語(yǔ)應(yīng)用文范文講評(píng)課件

2025年一月浙江高考首考應(yīng)用文作文講評(píng)演講稿

校園手機(jī)拍攝視頻你要參加課前一分鐘演講，針對(duì)校園里學(xué)生用手機(jī)拍攝視頻的現(xiàn)象寫一篇演講稿。內(nèi)容包括：1.

陳述看法2.

提出建議注意:(1)寫作詞數(shù)應(yīng)為80左右;(2)請(qǐng)按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。MyViewsonFilmingShortVideosonCampus_____________________________________________________________________1.文體：演講稿2.話題：手機(jī)拍視頻3.對(duì)象：班上師生4.人稱：第一人稱復(fù)數(shù)(we)或第三人稱(students)為主5.時(shí)態(tài)：一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)為主審題1.語(yǔ)篇結(jié)構(gòu)分析-開頭：開門見山，直接引出主題，吸引聽眾注意力?？梢酝ㄟ^(guò)提問、引用數(shù)據(jù)或描述現(xiàn)象引入。-主體：

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第一部分：陳述現(xiàn)象，描述學(xué)生用手機(jī)拍視頻的具體情況（如拍攝內(nèi)容、頻率、影響等）。

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第二部分：分析現(xiàn)象的利弊，既要指出積極的一面（如記錄美好瞬間、分享知識(shí)），也要指出消極影響（如干擾學(xué)習(xí)、侵犯隱私）。

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第三部分：提出具體建議，針對(duì)問題給出解決方案。-結(jié)尾：總結(jié)全文，呼吁行動(dòng)或提出展望，增強(qiáng)感染力。寫作分析與指導(dǎo)2.邏輯思維構(gòu)建-因果分析法：分析學(xué)生用手機(jī)拍視頻的原因（如技術(shù)便利、社交需求）及其帶來(lái)的結(jié)果（如學(xué)習(xí)效率下降、隱私問題）。-問題求解法：先描述問題，再提出解決方案（如制定規(guī)則、合理使用手機(jī)）。-對(duì)比分析法：對(duì)比手機(jī)拍視頻的正面和負(fù)面影響，突出建議的必要性。3.語(yǔ)言表達(dá)與銜接-使用邏輯連接詞保持語(yǔ)篇連貫性：

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陳述現(xiàn)象：Nowadays,Withthepopularityofsmartphones,Itiscommontosee...

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分析利弊：Ontheonehand...Ontheotherhand...

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提出建議：Toaddressthisissue,Isuggest...-使用指代詞（如this,it,they）和替代詞（如suchbehavior,thisphenomenon）避免重復(fù)。

4.句式多樣化-簡(jiǎn)單句：用于清晰表達(dá)觀點(diǎn)（如“Usingphonestorecordvideosispopularamongstudents.”）。-復(fù)合句：用于分析原因或結(jié)果（如“Sincesmartphonesareeasilyaccessible,studentsoftenusethemtorecordvideos.”）。-強(qiáng)調(diào)句：用于突出重點(diǎn)（如“Itisthemisuseofphonesthatcausesdistractionsinclass.”）。-反問句：用于增強(qiáng)感染力（如“Shouldn’twefocusmoreonlearninginsteadofrecordingeverything?”）。5.內(nèi)容創(chuàng)新與思維拓展-結(jié)合實(shí)際案例：描述具體的校園場(chǎng)景（如“Somestudentsrecordvideosduringclass,whichdistractsothers.”）。-引用名言或數(shù)據(jù)：增強(qiáng)說(shuō)服力（如“Accordingtoarecentsurvey,over70%ofstudentsadmittousingphonesduringstudyhours.”）。-提出創(chuàng)新建議：如“設(shè)立校園視頻創(chuàng)作比賽，引導(dǎo)學(xué)生合理使用手機(jī)”。6.語(yǔ)用與語(yǔ)境適切性-語(yǔ)氣適當(dāng)：演講稿應(yīng)具有親和力和號(hào)召力，避免過(guò)于正式或生硬。-面向聽眾：考慮聽眾是學(xué)生，語(yǔ)言應(yīng)通俗易懂，避免復(fù)雜術(shù)語(yǔ)。-感染力：通過(guò)情感化語(yǔ)言（如“Let’sworktogethertocreateabetterlearningenvironment!”）激發(fā)共鳴。Goodmorning,everyone!Haveyounoticedhowoftenweseeourclassmatescapturingmomentsontheirphones?Fromfunnyskitstostunningsunsets,videoshavebecomeamajorpartofourschoollife.Thistrendreflectsourcreativityanddesiretoshareexperiences.However,it'scrucialtousethistechnologyresponsibly.Excessivefilming過(guò)度的拍攝

candistractusfromlessonsandevencreatesafetyhazardsincrowdedareas.So,let'sbemindfulofwhenandwherewefilm.我們要注意拍攝的時(shí)間和地點(diǎn)

。Let'srespectourclassmates'privacyandfocusonlearningduringclasstime.Byusingourphoneswisely,wecanmakesurevideo-makingenhances,nothinders阻礙,ourschoolexperience.Thankyou.寫作示范一

從積極角度引導(dǎo)Goodmorning,everyone!Ourcampusisincreasinglyfilledwiththesoundsofclickingshuttersandrecordingvideos.Whilecapturingmemoriesisgreat,it'sbecomingaseriousdistraction.Manystudentsare

soengrossedin全神貫注

filmingthattheymissimportantannouncementsandlessons.Moreover,theconstantneedtorecordeverythingcantakeawayfromthejoyofsimplyexperiencingthemoment.Weriskbecomingpassiveobserversratherthanactiveparticipantsinourschoollife.Therefore,Iurgeeveryonetobemoremindfuloftheirphoneusage.Let'sputourphonesawayduringclassandfocusonlearning.Let'senjoythepresentmomentwithouttheneedtoconstantlydocumentit.Let'sreclaimourfocusandmakethemostofourtimeatschool.Thankyou.寫作示范二

從消極角度警示Dearclassmates,Recently,thecrazeforfilmingshortvideoshassweptacrossourcampus.Itindeedenrichesourschooldays.Wecancapturethetouchingscenesofteachers'patientguidanceandtheexcitingmomentsofcompetitions.Thisactivityalsonurturesouraestheticsenseaswepayattentiontolightingandangles.Butwecan'tturnablindeyetothedownsides.

但我們不能對(duì)它的負(fù)面影響視而不見。Alotofstudentswastetheirstudytimebyconstantlycheckingthevideoeffects.What'sworse,thenoisefromfilmingsometimesdisturbsthequietlearningenvironment.Herearemythoughts.Firstly,weoughttolimitthefilmingtimeduringweekdays.Secondly,wemustabidebytheschool'sregulationsonquietzones.Lastly,wecanorganizetheme-basedfilmingconteststochannelourenthusiasminapositiveway.Let'sensurefilmingservesasaplustoourcampuslife.Thankyou!寫作示范三Dearfriends,Inthepastfewmonths,it'sbeenquitecommontoseestudentsfilmingaroundcampus.Ithasitsadvantages.Forinstance,itallowsustoshareouruniquecampusculturewithmorepeople,makingourschoolmorerenowned.Italsogivesintrovertedstudentsachancetoexpressthemselvesinacreativeway.Nonetheless,thenegativeimpactsareemerging.盡管如此，負(fù)面影響正在顯現(xiàn)。Somestudentsgetsocarriedawaythattheyskipclassestofilm.Andtheoveruseofmobilephonesforfilmingmayharmoureyesight.Tomakethingsbetter,Isuggestthefollowing.Firstly,theschoolcanprovideprofessionalfilmingguidancetohelpusimproveskills.Secondly,weshouldformfilminggroupsandsuperviseeachother'sstudytime.Lastly,usethevideostomakeeducationalcontent,likecampusguides.Let'sbalancefilmingandlearningwell.Thanks!寫作示范四Dearclassmates,Recently,therehasbeenagrowingtrendofstudentsusingtheirmobilephonestotakevideosoncampus.Wecanoftenseethemfilmingvariousscenes,frombeautifulcampusscenerytointerestingclassroommoments.Whileitcanbeawaytorecordmemories,weshouldalsobeawareofthepotentialproblems.Forexample,excessiveusemaydistractusfromourstudies.Herearesomesuggestionsasfollows.Firstly,weshouldsetasidespecifictimesforfilming,likeduringbreaksorafterschool,toavoidinterferingwithlearning.Secondly,whenfilming,weshouldrespectothers'privacyandnotpostinappropriatecontent.Let'smakethemostofmobilephonevideoswhilemaintainingagoodbalancewithourstudiesandcampuslife.Thankyou!寫作示范五Dearfellows,Haveyounoticedthatusingmobilephonestoshootvideoshasbecomeprevalentonourcampus?Whetherit'sacooldanceontheplaygroundoragroupdiscussionintheclassroom,studentsareeagertocapturethosemoments.However,thisbehaviormightleadtosomenegativeimpacts.Itcouldcauseustolosefocusduringclassifweareconstantlythinkingaboutgettingtheperfectshot.So,Iproposethatweshouldhaveaself-awarenessofwhenandwheretouseourphonesforfilming.Inaddition,weshouldaskforpermissionbeforefilmingotherstoensurewerespecteveryone'srights.Let'susethismoderntoolrationallyandensureitdoesn'tgetinthewayofoureducationalpursuits.

Thankyou!寫作示范六Hello,everyone!Thesedays,it'snotuncommontoseestudentstakingvideoswiththeirmobilephonesalloverthecampus.Fromtheexcitingsportseventstothepeacefullibrarycorners,nosceneseemstobeleftunrecorded.Butwemustadmitthatthisphenomenonalsobringschallenges.Theoveruseofmobilephonesforfilmingmightreduceourface-to-facecommunicationandinteraction.Mysuggestionsareasfollows.Firstly,wecanlimitthelengthandfrequencyofourvideo-makingtopreventitfromtakinguptoomuchofourtime.Secondly,weshouldencouragepositiveandmeaningfulcontentcreation,suchasdocumentingourlearningprogressorcommunityserviceactivities.Bydoingso,wecanenjoythebenefitsofmobilephonevideoswhilestillmaintainingahealthyandactivecampuslife.Thankyou!寫作示范七演講稿包括發(fā)言稿、致辭、競(jìng)選稿等，此類文體一般包括簡(jiǎn)短介紹、陳述主題、概括總結(jié)三部分。演講稿的語(yǔ)言通常要富有感染力，立場(chǎng)要明確，觀點(diǎn)要鮮明。具體寫作結(jié)構(gòu)為：演講稿——激情洋溢，暢所欲言

（2021·全國(guó)乙卷改編）你校將舉辦英語(yǔ)演講比賽。請(qǐng)你以Be

smartonlinelearners為題寫一篇發(fā)言稿參賽，內(nèi)容包括：1.分析優(yōu)勢(shì)與不足；2.提出學(xué)習(xí)建議。注意：1.寫作詞數(shù)應(yīng)為80左右；2.請(qǐng)按如下格式作答。Be

smart

online

learnersGoodmorning，everyone，It’sagreathonourformetostandhereandgiveaspeechtitled

“Besmartonlinelearners”.

寫作指導(dǎo)發(fā)言稿也屬于演講稿的一種常見形式，它是參加會(huì)議、比賽等活

動(dòng)的人為了表達(dá)自己的意見、看法而事先準(zhǔn)備好的文稿。1.本篇作文要求寫一篇發(fā)言稿，主題為Besmartonlinelearners。2.學(xué)生在寫作時(shí)，時(shí)態(tài)應(yīng)以一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)為主，人稱以第一人稱為主。3.寫作時(shí)需注意合適的開場(chǎng)語(yǔ)和結(jié)束語(yǔ)。寫作內(nèi)容包括分析在線學(xué)習(xí)

的優(yōu)勢(shì)與不足，即進(jìn)行對(duì)比。學(xué)生可結(jié)合自身經(jīng)歷來(lái)寫，使文稿內(nèi)

容更加貼近生活。Goodmorning，everyone，It’sagreathonourformetostandhereandgiveaspeechtitled“Be

smartonlinelearners”.Theadvantagesofonlinelearningareobvious.Itallowsustolearnanytimeandanywhere.Besides，wecanabsorballkindsofresourcestolearnmoreefficiently.However，itsdisadvantagescannotbeignored.Staring

at

the

screen

for

long

hours

is

harmful

to

our

eyes.Worsestill，wedon’thavemanyopportunitiestointeractwithourteachersandclassmates.Thenwhatshouldwedotobesmartonlinelearners？First，weshouldbebravetodiscussourproblemswithothers.Second，it

is

wise

to

take

a

short

break

after

learning

for

30

minutes.Inconclusion，

only

by

being

smart

online

learners

can

we

truly

enjoy

the

benefits

of

modern

technology.

Be

smart

online

learners佳作點(diǎn)評(píng)1.文章開篇引入話題，然后闡述演講的具體內(nèi)容，最后總結(jié)。2.范文中使用了大量亮點(diǎn)句式：動(dòng)詞-ing短語(yǔ)作主語(yǔ)Staringatthe

screen...；it作形式主語(yǔ)itiswisetotake...；倒裝結(jié)構(gòu)onlybybeing

smartonlinelearnerscanwe...；還使用了一些過(guò)渡詞語(yǔ)：besides，

however，worsestill，first，second，inconclusion等。

第一部分（首段）：引入話題1.TodayIamhonouredtohavetheopportunitytomakethisspeech.今天我很榮幸能有機(jī)會(huì)做這個(gè)演講。2.Goodafternoon，ladiesandgentlemen，distinguishedguests，and

honorablejudges.Thankyouallforbeingheretoday，aswegatherto

discussanimportantissuethataffectsusall.女士們，先生們，尊敬的來(lái)賓們，尊敬的評(píng)委們，大家下午好！感

謝大家今天來(lái)到這里，我們聚在一起討論一個(gè)影響我們所有人的重

要問題。3.Itismygreathonourtosharewithyoumyopinionsonhowtomemorize

Englishwords.我很榮幸能與大家分享我對(duì)如何背英語(yǔ)單詞的看法。第二部分（主體段）：具體內(nèi)容1.Thetopicofmyspeechishealthylivinghabits.我演講的主題是健康的生活習(xí)慣。2.I’lldividethistopicintofivemainaspects.我將從五個(gè)主要方面談?wù)撨@個(gè)主題。3.Asisknowntousall，failureisthemotherofsuccess.我們都知道失敗是成功之母。4.Asstudents，we’dbetterwalkortakepublicmeansoftransportation.作為學(xué)生，我們最好步行或乘坐公共交通工具。第三部分（結(jié)尾段）：總結(jié)、期待1.Thanksforyourlistening（tomyspeech）.感謝大家傾聽（我的演講）。2.Thankyouforyourtimeandattentiontoday.AsIconcludemy

remarks，Ichallengeeachandeveryoneofyoutotakeaction