2023高考英語(yǔ)復(fù)習(xí)與訓(xùn)練-訓(xùn)練14讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)示例與寫(xiě)作訓(xùn)練09

讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)示例與寫(xiě)作訓(xùn)練9

【寫(xiě)作示例】

【原文呈現(xiàn)】

閱讀下面短文，根據(jù)所給情節(jié)進(jìn)行續(xù)寫(xiě)，使之構(gòu)成一個(gè)完整的故事。

Thepassengersonthebuswatchedsympatheticallyastheattractiveyoungwomanwitha

whitewalkingstickmadeherwaycarefullyupthesteps.Shepaidthedriverand,foundtheseat

he'dtoldherwasempty.Thenshesettledinandrestedherstickagainstherleg.

IthadbeenayearsinceSusanbecameblind.Duetoamedicalmisdiagnosis（誤診），shewas

suddenlythrownintoaworldofdarknessandfrustration.Andallshehadtodependonwasher

husband,Mark.

MarkwasanAirForceofficer.Whenshefirstlosthersight,hewatchedhersinkinto

hopelessnessandwasdeterminedtohelphegaintheconfidence.

Finally,Susanfeltreadytoreturntoherjob,buthowwouldshegetthere?Shewasnowtoo

frightenedtogetaroundthecitybyherself.So,Markdrovehertoworkeachday,eventhough

theyworkedatoppositeendsofthecity.

Atfirst,thiscomfortedSusan.Soon,however,MarkrealizedthenecessityforSusanto

becomeindependentandwantedhertostarttakingthebusagain.Justasexpected,Susanwas

afraidofthisidea.ButMakepromisedSusanthathewouldridethebuswithheruntilshegotthe

hangofit.

Fortwoweeks,Mark,inmilitaryunifoimaccompaniedSusantoandfromworkeachday.He

taughtherhowtorelyonherothersenses,specificallyherhearing,totellwhereshewasandhow

toadapttohernewsurroundings.

Atlast,Susandecidedthatshewasreadytotryonherown.Mondaymorningarrived,and

beforesheleft,shehuggedMark.Hereyeswasfilledwithtearsofgratitudeforhispatienceand

love.Shesaidgood-bye,andfbrthefirsttime,theywenttheirseparateways.

Eachdaywentperfectly,andSusanhadneverfeltbetter.Shemadeit.

OnFridaymorning,Susantookthebustoworkasusual.Asshewaspayingforthebusfhre.

thedriversaid,“Lady,Isuredoenvyyou.^^(340words)

注意：

1.所續(xù)寫(xiě)短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2.應(yīng)使用5個(gè)以上短文標(biāo)有下劃線的關(guān)鍵詞語(yǔ)；

3.續(xù)寫(xiě)部分分為兩段，每段的開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)以為你寫(xiě)好；

4.續(xù)寫(xiě)完成后，請(qǐng)用下劃線標(biāo)出你所使用的關(guān)鍵詞。

Paragraph1:

Curious,sheaskedthedriver,(iWhydoyousaythatyouenvy^me?”

Paragraph2:

TearsofhappinesspoureddownSusanscheeks.

【思維路徑】

［核心內(nèi)容］

文本主要內(nèi)容為：一位女士因失明而感到沮喪與絕望，丈夫陪伴她重建自信。在她害怕

獨(dú)自出門(mén)時(shí)，她丈夫每天開(kāi)車(chē)接送她上下班。為了讓她重新獨(dú)立起來(lái)，她丈夫說(shuō)服她重新坐

公交車(chē)上班。一開(kāi)始，他陪她一同坐公交車(chē)，教她學(xué)會(huì)用其他的感官去判斷位置。兩周后，

女士決定獨(dú)自出行，一切都很順利。在第五天早上上車(chē)之后，司機(jī)表達(dá)了對(duì)她的羨慕。

［寫(xiě)作思路］

(1)明確故事人物關(guān)系(characters)。故事中主要人物為失明的女士Susan,她的丈夫Mark

以及公交車(chē)司機(jī)。

(2)理清故事主要事件(events)。丈夫陪失明的妻子每天坐公交車(chē)上下班兩周后，妻子開(kāi)

始自己坐公交車(chē)。在她獨(dú)自出行的第五天，公交車(chē)司機(jī)表達(dá)了對(duì)她的羨慕。

(3)根據(jù)已知人物、事件及續(xù)寫(xiě)段落首句預(yù)測(cè)故事發(fā)展(development)。故事總體的發(fā)展

應(yīng)該是司機(jī)告訴Susan羨慕她的原因。因?yàn)樗緳C(jī)敘述的這個(gè)原因，Susan流下了幸福的眼淚。

可以結(jié)合前文表達(dá)的Mark對(duì)Susan的耐心與愛(ài)，預(yù)測(cè)這個(gè)原因可能是因?yàn)镸ark每天都在

暗中跟著Susan上下班，為了保證她的安全。續(xù)寫(xiě)第一段：Susan問(wèn)司機(jī)為何羨慕她，司機(jī)

告訴她羨慕她的原因是因?yàn)樗幸粋€(gè)非常愛(ài)她的人。他看到她丈夫每天都看著她坐公交車(chē)安

全到達(dá)辦公室才離開(kāi)，表達(dá)了對(duì)她濃濃的愛(ài)意。續(xù)寫(xiě)第二段：Susan聽(tīng)完之后流下了幸福的

眼淚?；蛟S她回憶起Mark一直以來(lái)對(duì)她的愛(ài)和照顧，并因此而感到幸福與感動(dòng)；或許她開(kāi)

始想象回想這一周上班的經(jīng)歷，回憶著Mark在周?chē)抵嘘P(guān)注她的跡象；也有可能她回家后

表達(dá)了對(duì)Mark所做的一切的感動(dòng)，表達(dá)了她的幸運(yùn)與對(duì)丈夫的愛(ài)。

(4)結(jié)合下劃線詞羅列寫(xiě)作要點(diǎn)(points)。結(jié)合下劃線詞和文本內(nèi)容，展開(kāi)盡可能豐富的

想象，羅列出盡可能多的故事發(fā)展情節(jié)。例如，第一段可以通過(guò)問(wèn)以下問(wèn)題來(lái)獲取寫(xiě)作要點(diǎn)

“WhydidthedriverenvySusan?Whatwouldbethepossibleanswer?Whatwouldthedriver

say?DidithaveanythingtodowithSusan'shusband,Mark?等"；第二段可以問(wèn)以下問(wèn)題來(lái)獲

取寫(xiě)作要點(diǎn)：WhatwouldSusanthink?Whatmightbeherfuthcrreaction?Whatwouldshedo?

等”。

［參考范文I

Curious,sheaskedthedriver,''Whydoyousaythatyouenvyme?”Thedriverresponded,"it

mustfeelgoodtobetakencareofandprotectedlikeyouare."Confused,Susanaskedagain,

“Whatdoyoumean?”Thedriverexplained,ltWell,youknow,everymorningforthepastweek,a

finelookinggentlemaninamilitaryuniformhasbeenstandingacrossthecornerwatchingyouas

yougetoffthebus.Hemakessureyoucrossthestreetsafelyandhewatchesuntilyouenteryour

officebuilding.Thenheblowsyouakissandwalksaway.Youarealuckylady.”

TearsofhappinesspoureddownSusanscheeks.Althoughshecouldn'tseehimwithhereyes,

shehadalwaysfeltthatMarkwasjustthere.Shewassuchaluckyandhappylady,fbrher

husbandhadgivenheragiftmorepowerfulthansight,agiftthatshecouldfeelanddidn'tneedto

see一thegiftoflovethatcanbringlightwherethereisdarkness.(150words)

［范文解析］

范文圍繞文章的內(nèi)容進(jìn)行了合情合理的拓展。給出的兩段開(kāi)頭分別為Susan好奇地問(wèn)

司機(jī)為何羨慕她，以及Susan留下幸福的眼淚。因此第一段主要寫(xiě)司機(jī)對(duì)Susan的這一問(wèn)題

進(jìn)行回答，而這一原因是Susan的丈夫?yàn)榇_保安全而每天暗暗陪伴她上班，因而讓Susan流

下了幸福的眼淚。第二段寫(xiě)Susan知道之后的心理活動(dòng)，包括回顧這幾天坐公交車(chē)有被陪伴

的感覺(jué)，以及對(duì)丈夫的這種無(wú)微不至的愛(ài)的感動(dòng)。范文最后一句寫(xiě)了這份愛(ài)“照亮”了Susan

黑暗的世界，既與她失明這一事實(shí)想結(jié)合，又升華了主題。

［提煉歸納］

1.合理拓展情節(jié)

讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)首先要讀通給定文本，把握故事的人物和事件。在此基礎(chǔ)上根據(jù)提示對(duì)故事的

發(fā)展作出合情合理又合乎邏輯的預(yù)測(cè)。為了將預(yù)測(cè)過(guò)程顯性化，可以通過(guò)設(shè)問(wèn)的方式，將預(yù)

測(cè)重點(diǎn)以問(wèn)題的方式顯示出來(lái)，以利后續(xù)寫(xiě)作時(shí)的心理整理和語(yǔ)言組織。在該練習(xí)中，我們

通過(guò)7個(gè)問(wèn)題來(lái)拓展并整理自己的寫(xiě)作思路，這7個(gè)問(wèn)題以“司機(jī)羨慕Susan的原因”以及

“Susan由此做出的反應(yīng)”為主體，之間有一定的邏輯關(guān)系，符合故事發(fā)展的合理結(jié)局。

2.有效運(yùn)用銜接手段

在具體的寫(xiě)作過(guò)程中我們要對(duì)羅列的要點(diǎn)進(jìn)行篩選和整合,還要考慮寫(xiě)作要點(diǎn)之間連接

手段(connectives)的有效運(yùn)用,例如在范文中，我們用了“until"，“although"，“for”等連詞，

使得小句間的邏輯關(guān)系更清晰明了，文章更加連貫。同時(shí):我們也使用了“waching…”和

“confused”這樣的非謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞結(jié)構(gòu)作伴隨狀語(yǔ)和原因狀語(yǔ)，使得行文更加流暢，語(yǔ)言更加

地道。

【寫(xiě)作演練】

1.閱讀下面短文，根據(jù)所給情節(jié)進(jìn)行續(xù)寫(xiě)，使之構(gòu)成一個(gè)完整的故事。

AtDana'syardsale,Timchoseabaseballfromthetoysspreadonthecardtableandasked

abouttheprice.DanatoldhimeverythingwasaquarterexceptNezumi,acottontoyrat.Itwas

greywithsomecottonstickingoutfromtheholewhereanearhadbeentornoff.

“Nezumiisextraspecial,soheistendollars.Heneedsasafenewhome.^^Danasighed.Tim

laughedsayinghedidn'thavetendollars.DanalaughedtooandgaveNezumitoTimasafreegift

becausehewasherfriend.WhenTimwhispereditwassortofold,Danasaidoldtoyswerethe

best.ShetheninvitedTimtoherbirthdaypartythenextevening,addingthatherparentswere

givingherarealratforherbirthday.Timwasamazedandaskedifitwasaliverat.

“Ofcourse.^^Danasaid.

Athome,Tim'smothershowedhimthegiftshehadboughtforDana.Itwasaknitting

spool（針織線軸）shapedlikeamushroom.MomsaidDanacouldknitascarffbrherdoll.Tim

sighedthatDanawasn'taknittingkindofpersonbutaratkindofperson.Momlaughedafter

knowingwhathadhappened.Togethertheydrovetothepetstore,whereTimsearchedand

searchedandselectedaclearplasticball,oneinwhichtheratcouldrunaroundonthefloorsafe

fromcatsanddogs.TimthoughtofNezumi'searanddecidedDana'snewratwouldneedthisball.

Thenextday,Danabroughtcupcakestoclass.WhenshehandedacupcaketoTim,sheasked

ifTimbroughtNezumitoschoolasNezumilikedtorideinbackpacks.Timwasatalossbecause

Nezumiwasathomeonhisbed.ThenDanaaskedwhatgifthewasgivingher.Timreplieditwas

asurprise.InsilencetheysatfbrawhilebeforeheheardDanasayherparentsweregivinghera

newbikefbrherbirthdayinsteadofaliveratbecausetheythoughtratswouldbitethings.

注意:1.所續(xù)寫(xiě)的短文詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2.續(xù)寫(xiě)部分分為兩段，每段的開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)已為你寫(xiě)好；

Para1:

Athomethatafternoon,Timstaredattheplasticratball.

Para2:

Allofasudden,hehadanidea.

2.閱讀下面短文，根據(jù)所給情節(jié)進(jìn)行續(xù)寫(xiě)，使之構(gòu)成一個(gè)完整的故事。

Everynightafterdinner,mygrandparentswouldturnonTVforthe6o*clocknews.No

matterhowhardItriedtoactthegrown-upandwatchwiththem,Iwouldinevitably（不可避免地）

getdistracteduntil6:30whenWheelofFortunecameon.

Mygrandmawouldplayalong,tryingtoguesstheanswersbeforetheplayers.Hershoutsof

excitementwhenshesucceededcouldbeheardacrossthehouse.

AsIgrewolder,myloveofreadingandwritingblossomed,andIwouldjoinmygrandmain

yellingoutletters.Soon,Iwasexperiencingthethrillofsolvingthepuzzlesfasterthanthe

contestants（選手）andevenmygrandma.Iwashooked.

Duetoconstantmovingaroundwithmymomandfather,Istartedtospendlesstimewithmy

grandparents,butourbondremainedstrong.Mygrandparentsprovidedmewiththestability,love

andsupportthatIdesperatelyneededwhenIgrewup.WhenIwasinabadmood,Iwould

remcinberthosesweetnights.

Afewyearslater,IwaslivingwithmygrandpainChicago.Whilewatchinganepisode（集）

ofWheelofFortune,wehadawaveofnostalgia（，懷I日）.Withapplication,Ididn'tthinkmuchofit

untilIreceivedamailmonthslater,announcingthattheWheelofFortunecastingteamwould

cometoChicago.Inordertobeconsideredforanin-personaudition（試演）,applicantswouldneed

tosubmitasixty-secondvideoexplainingwhytheywantedtobeacontestant.

Allmychildhoodmemoriesofwatchingtheshowcamefloodingback,andIknewIwas

meanttospin（旋轉(zhuǎn)）thewheelforreal.Immediately,Irecordedavideoandsubmittedit.Acouple

ofweekslater,Ireceivedane-mailinvitingmetoauditioninperson.Iwasverynervousonthe

auditionday.Icouldn'tbelieveIwastryingoutfor"America'sGame”!Aftertworoundsofintense

auditioning,withhalfofthehopefulslettinggoafterthefirstround,itwasover.Allofus

applicantsweretoldwewouldreceivealetterinthemailwithintwoweeksifwewereselected.

注意：

所續(xù)寫(xiě)短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2.至少使用5個(gè)短文中標(biāo)有下劃線的關(guān)鍵詞語(yǔ)；

3.續(xù)寫(xiě)部分分為兩段，每段的開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)已為你寫(xiě)好；

4.續(xù)寫(xiě)完成后，請(qǐng)用下劃線標(biāo)出你所使用的關(guān)鍵詞語(yǔ)

Paragraph1:

Irantothemailboxeverydaybuttherewasnothing.

Paragraph2：

Thenonemorningwhilegettingreadyfbrwork,Icheckedmymailandletouttheloudest

screamever.

3.閱讀下面短文，根據(jù)所給情節(jié)進(jìn)行續(xù)寫(xiě)，使之構(gòu)成一個(gè)完整的故事。

Whenshelookedaroundherhouse,BettyMargaretsawlotsofelectronics.Alongwiththe

usualthingslikeherlaptopandsmartphone,therewereallofherkids'electronicdevices:cell

phones,videogamedevicesandmore!Thereseemedtobemorethanenoughwaysforherandher

threechildrentobeonlineallday,everyday.ks5u

Ms.MargaretworriedthatherkidswerebecomingtoodependentontheInternetand

electronics.Thenshebegantorereadoneofherfavoritebooks,HenryThoreau'sWalden,which

gaveMs.Margaretanidea.Thoreauspent2yearsinasimplecabinwithoutrunningwater,and

havingtogrowhisownfood.Maybesheandherfamilycouldlivewithoutsuchluxuriesas

computersandelectronicdevicesforawhile.

Ms.Margarettalkedwithherkidsandexplainedthatshewantedthefamilytotrylivingfor6

monthswithouttheInternet,cellphones,TV,andvideogames.Ms.Margaretwritesarticlesfora

newspaperinAustralia,andhadwrittenseveralbooksaswell.Shetoldherchildrenthatifthey

agreed,shewouldwriteabookabouttheirexperienceandtheycouldgoonatripabroadwiththe

moneyfromsalesofthebook.Herthreechildrenagreed,and“theexperiment,"asMs.Margaret

called,began.

Overthecourseoftheexperiment,theMargaretchildrenhaddifferentreactionstolife

withoutelectronics.Beforetheexperimentbegan,Anni,theeldestofthechildren,readbooks

morethanheryoungerbrotherandsister.Shethereforehadarelativelyeasyadjustmenttothe

family'snewlifbstyle.Annicouldalsousethelibrary'scomputerforherhomework.Bill,who

lovedtoplayvideogamesbeforetheexperimentbegan,hadtofindawaytospendallofhisnew

freetime.Hestartedtospendmoretimepracticinghissaxophone（薩克Wf管）.Susan,the

youngestchildinthefamily,hadthehardesttimeadjustingtolifewithoutelectronics.Shefelt

restlessforthefirstweeksandlater,influencedbyhereldersister,graduallybegantofindinterest

inthenovelexperiencesbroughtbyvariousbooks.

注意：

1.所續(xù)寫(xiě)短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2.應(yīng)使用5個(gè)以上短文中標(biāo)有下劃線的關(guān)鍵詞語(yǔ)；

3.續(xù)寫(xiě)部分分為兩段，每段的開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)已為你寫(xiě)好；

4.續(xù)寫(xiě)完成后，請(qǐng)用下劃線標(biāo)出你所使用的關(guān)鍵詞語(yǔ)。

Paragraph1：

Thefamilycarriedonwiththeexperimentfbrthe6monthswithouttechnologycontrolling

theirlives.

Paragraph2:

Ms.Margaretwrotethebookshehadplanned.

4.閱讀下面材?料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫(xiě)兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。續(xù)寫(xiě)

的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右。

Iwaslackingineverythingneededtostartanewfriendship.

Myparentsmovedtothetownwhentheydecidedtolookfornewjobsbuttheydidn'trealize

IwasreallyhurtwhenIsaidgoodbyetomyoldfriends.Itfeltawfultobeanewstudentinthe

schoolandwhenmyclassmateswerechatting,whatIcoulddowastobecaughtupinmy

thoughtswatchingthecloudsoutsidethewindow.Iwasnotgoodatmathorhistory;norwasI

goodatdrawingordancing.Iwasshyandtimid.Ihadafewfriendsbackatmyhometownandit

seemedthattheyweretheonlyoneswhoIcouldbefriendswithformywholelife.IfeltIhad

achievedapointofsaturationwithregardtohavingfriendsandIcouldmakenofurtheraddition

tomyfriendlist.Iwasashamedofmyself,soIbelievedIdeservednonoticefromothersuntil

Emilycametomyworld.

Emilywasfearless,outspokenandeasytogo.ShewaseverythingIwasnotandIwastoo

shytocomeoutofmyshell.ImetEmilyinschoolalmosteverydayandyetInevertalkedtoher.

Wewereinthesameclassbutwewerelikepolesapart.HowIwishedIcouldbelikeherorat

leastbeafriendofhers!

Itwasanotherordinaryday.

Iwanderedtothebusstopinthemorningandwaitedfortheschoolbus.Birdsweresinging

songswiththeirfriendsbutwhocouldIsingsongswith?Igotonthebusandwentstraighttomy

usualseat,complaininginalowvoiceaboutgettingupearlyandgoingtoschoollikeeveryother

day,andabouthowthingsweregoingtobethesamealloveragain.LittledidIrealizesomething

differentwouldhappenthatday.

Para.1:

WhenIgotuptogetdownthebus,myschoolbagwasstuckinthearmrest.

Para.2:

IgotnoticedbyEmily,whobroughtmecouragetostartanewfriendship!

5.閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫(xiě)兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

TheMeredithfamilylivedinasmallcommunity.Astheeconomywasindecline,some

peopleinthetownhadlosttheirjobs.Manyoftheirfamilieswerestrugglingtomakeendsmeet.

Peopleweretryingtohelpeachothermeetthechallenges.

Mrs.Meredithwasamostkindandthoughtfulwoman.Shespentagreatdealoftimevisiting

thepoor.Sheknewtheyhadproblems,andtheyneededallkindsofhelp.Whenshehadtime,she

wouldbringfoodandmedicinetothem.

Onemorningshetoldherchildrenaboutafamilyshehadvisitedthedaybefore.Therewasa

mansickinbed,hiswife,whotookcareofhimandcouldnotgoouttowork,andtheirlittleboy.

Thelittleboy-hisnamewasBernard-hadinterestedherverymuch.

“Iwishyoucouldseehim,^^shesaidtoherownchildren,John,Harry,andClara."Heissuch

ahelptohismother.Hewantsverymuchtoearnsomemoney,butIdonftseewhathecando.”

Aftertheirmotherlefttheroom,thechildrensatthinkingaboutBernard.wishwecould

helphimtoearnmoney,“saidClara."Hisfamilyissufferingsomuch.”

“SodoI,“saidHarry."Wereallyshoulddosomethingtoassistthem.^^

Forsomemoments,Johnsaidnothing,but,suddenly,hesprangtohisfeetandcried,“Ihave

agreatidea!Ihaveasolutionthatwecanallhelpaccomplish（完成）

Theotherchildrenalsojumpedupallattention.WhenJohnhadanidea,itwassuretobea

goodone."ItellyouwhatwecandoJsaidJohn.uYouknowthatbigboxofcomUncleJohnsent

us?Well,wecanmakepopcorn（爆米花）,andputitintopaperbags,andBernardcantakeit

aroundtothehousesandsellit.”

注意：

1.續(xù)寫(xiě)詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右：

2.請(qǐng)按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。

Para.1:

WhenMrs.MeredithheardofJohn'sidea,shethoughtitwasagoodone,too.

Para.2:

Witheverythingready,Bernardstartedoutonhisnewbusiness.

笞案與解析

1.【參考范文】

Athomethatafternoon,Timstaredattheplasticratball.Wonderingabouttheuseofthe

clearplasticballifDanahadnorat,hestartedwalkingupanddowntheroomwithafrownonhis

face.Momwassurprisedandaskedhimwhatwashappening.TimtoldherDanawasn'tgettinga

liveratfromherparentsbutabike.Astheywererackingtheirbrains（絞腦汁）tocomeupwithan

appropriategift,TimturnaroundandsawNezumionhisbed.

Allofasudden,hehadanidea.HeliftedNezumiandsqueezingNezumiintotheplasticball

withgreatcautionsothatNezumiwouldbesafefromcatsanddogs.Seeingthis,MomaskedTim

whetherhewasgivingDanaanoldcottonratwithoneearasagift,Timnoddedwithasmile

sayingshewoulddefinitelylikeit.LookingatMom'sconfusedexpression,TimaddedthatDana

wasaNezumikindofpersonwhothoughtoldtoysweretheBEST.

【解析】

通過(guò)閱讀所給文章可知，Tim從Dana的庭院舊貨出售會(huì)得到了有一只耳朵被扯掉了的

玩具老鼠Nezumi,Tim很喜歡。Dana的生日快到了，Tim去商店里為Dana喜歡的老鼠買(mǎi)

了一個(gè)透明的塑料球，可以讓它在里面跑，不會(huì)被貓和狗咬傷。第二天Tim聽(tīng)到Dana說(shuō)她

的父母給她的生日禮物是一輛新自行車(chē)，而不是一只活老鼠，因?yàn)樗麄冋J(rèn)為老鼠會(huì)咬東西。

續(xù)寫(xiě)部分分為兩段，第一段開(kāi)頭是：那天下午在家里，Tim盯著塑料老鼠球。所以后文應(yīng)該

是講述Tim得知Dana不會(huì)受到老鼠作為生日禮物后的心理活動(dòng)，他覺(jué)得買(mǎi)的這個(gè)塑料老鼠

球沒(méi)有用了，于是他皺著眉頭開(kāi)始在房間里走來(lái)走去。媽媽很驚訝，問(wèn)他發(fā)生了什么事。

Tim告訴她Dana從她父母那里得到的不是一只活老鼠，而是一輛自行車(chē)。當(dāng)他們絞盡腦汁

想出合適的禮物時(shí)，Tim轉(zhuǎn)過(guò)身，看見(jiàn)Nezumi躺在床上；第二段開(kāi)頭是：突然，他有了一

個(gè)主意。本段應(yīng)該寫(xiě)Tim為Dana準(zhǔn)備生日禮物的過(guò)程，Tim要送Dana一只長(zhǎng)著一只耳朵

的老鼠。

最后還要注意所續(xù)寫(xiě)短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右。按要求完成寫(xiě)作任務(wù)。

【范文點(diǎn)評(píng)】

本文描寫(xiě)詳略得當(dāng)，使用了高級(jí)詞匯和高級(jí)句子。如：walkupanddown,not...but...,with

greatcaution等高級(jí)i司丫匚；WonderingabouttheuseoftheclearplasticballifDanahadnorat,he

startedwalkingupanddowntheroomwithafrownonhisfhce.非謂語(yǔ)動(dòng)詞的運(yùn)用和if引導(dǎo)的條

彳牛狀語(yǔ)從句；Seeingthis,MomaskedTimwhetherhewasgivingDanaanoldcottonratwithone

earasagift,Timnoddedwithasmilesayingshewoulddefinitelylikeit.運(yùn)用了whether弓|導(dǎo)的

賓語(yǔ)從句等高級(jí)句式。

2.【參考范文】

Paragraph1:

Irantothemailboxeveiydaybuttherewasnothing.Afteroneweek,Ibecamevery

frustratedandeventhoughtthemailhadbeendeliveredtothewrongdepartment.Mygrandma

cameandcomfortedme,"Laura,waitpatiently.nFeelingdefeated,Ireplied,nIwasn'tgoodenough.

Theydidn*twantme."Shesaidwithaconfidenttone,nYouwillbeselectedandreceivethemail.

Trustme."ThoughIdidn'tbelieveIwouldreceivethemail,Iwasnotsoanxious.Icalmeddown

andlivedmylifeasbefore.

Paragraph2:

Thenonemorningwhilegettingreadyforwork,Icheckedmymailandletouttheloudest

screamever.Thereitwas:amailfromWheelofFortunestatingthattheyhadatapedateforme.I

hadtoreaditseveraltimesbeforeItrulybelievedit.IwasgoingtobeacontestantonWheelof

Fortune!Iendedupfilmingmyepisodeafewmonthslater,andtheentireexperiencewasamazing.

FrommeetingPatandVanna,tospinningthewheeland,mostimportantly,sayingthosemagical

words,'*rdliketosolvethepuzzle.nItwasadayIwillneverforget.

【解析】

這是一篇讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)。文章講述了作者在爺爺奶奶的影響下喜歡上一檔名叫Wheelof

Fortune的節(jié)目。多年后，當(dāng)回到芝加哥和爺爺一起居住時(shí)，作者收到一封信，邀請(qǐng)他參加

這個(gè)節(jié)目的試演。出于對(duì)這個(gè)節(jié)目的喜愛(ài)，作者決定錄制一個(gè)短片嘗試。兩輪比賽后，節(jié)目

組請(qǐng)作者回家等通知。

續(xù)寫(xiě)分為兩段。

根據(jù)第一段的開(kāi)頭“我每天都去郵筒看，但什么都沒(méi)有“可以接著寫(xiě)：一周后還是沒(méi)有信

件，作者感到沮喪，估計(jì)自己可能被淘汰了。但是祖父母安慰她，給她信心，并且讓她耐心

等待。作者調(diào)整心態(tài)，回歸正常生活。

根據(jù)第二段的開(kāi)頭“那天早上我正準(zhǔn)備好去上班，檢查郵筒時(shí)，我大聲尖叫起來(lái)“可以接

著寫(xiě)：作者不敢相信自己收到節(jié)目組的來(lái)信，并給她安排了錄制時(shí)間。作者把自己的喜悅同

祖父母分享。非常感謝曾經(jīng)那段陪著他們一起觀看節(jié)目的日子，讓她不僅得到了歡樂(lè)還學(xué)到

了很多知識(shí)，得以參加這個(gè)全美國(guó)人民都喜歡的節(jié)目。

用5個(gè)以上的關(guān)鍵詞加大了寫(xiě)作難度?？忌鷳?yīng)熟悉關(guān)鍵詞，以便在適當(dāng)時(shí)候加以運(yùn)用。

寫(xiě)作完成后，要將關(guān)鍵詞下劃線。

【范文點(diǎn)評(píng)】

范文內(nèi)容完整，要點(diǎn)全面，語(yǔ)言規(guī)范，語(yǔ)篇連貫，詞數(shù)適當(dāng)，上下文意思連貫，符合邏

輯關(guān)系。作者在范文中使用了一些主從復(fù)合句，例如：ThoughIdidn*tbelieveIwouldreceive

themail,Iwasnotsoanxious.中though弓|導(dǎo)讓步狀語(yǔ)從句；Thereitwas:amailfromWheelof

Fortunestatingthattheyhadatapedateforme.中that弓|導(dǎo)賓語(yǔ)從句。

3.【參考范文】

Thefhmilycarriedonwiththeexperimentforthe6monthswithouttechnologycontrolling

theirlives.Ms.Margaretbelievestheyallcameoutbetterfortheexperience.Thechildrenhada

lotmoreinteractionwitheachotherandwiththeirmother.Nowthattheycouldnottextothers,

theyhadtoactuallyseeeachotherandtalk.Meanwhile,thefamilyplayedboardgamestogether,

cookedmealstogetherandreadthenewspapertogether.Billendedupdevelopingaserious

interestinmusic,andinSusan'scase,sheimprovedhergradesinschool.

Ms.Margaretwrotethebookshehadplanned.Thebookbecameanimmediatehitand

arousedgreatinterestamongmanyparents.Inherbookandininterviewsaboutthebook,Ms.

Margaretdescribesthepleasantchangesthathappenedinherfamilyandtheprogressherchildren

havemade.Sheencouragesfamiliestosetasidespecial"screen-freedays“wherefamiliesunplug

themselvesandspendtimetogether,whichisexactlywhatherfamilyhaveagreedtodoafter

returningfromanenjoyablefamilytripabroad.

【解析】

本篇書(shū)面表達(dá)是讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)。通過(guò)閱讀所給文章可知，貝蒂?瑪格麗是一位母親，她有3

個(gè)孩子。因?yàn)閾?dān)心她的孩子們變得過(guò)于依賴(lài)互聯(lián)網(wǎng)和電子產(chǎn)品，于是她向她的孩子們提出說(shuō)

她想讓這個(gè)家庭試著在沒(méi)有互聯(lián)網(wǎng)、手機(jī)、電視和電子游戲的情況下生活6個(gè)月的計(jì)劃。如

果他們同意，她將寫(xiě)一本關(guān)于他們的經(jīng)歷的書(shū)，他們可以用賣(mài)書(shū)的錢(qián)去國(guó)外旅行。孩子們同

意并開(kāi)始了這種生活。

【范文點(diǎn)評(píng)】

續(xù)寫(xiě)部分分為兩段，第一段開(kāi)頭是：這個(gè)家庭在沒(méi)有科技控制他們生活的情況下進(jìn)行了

6個(gè)月的實(shí)驗(yàn)。所以本段應(yīng)該寫(xiě)這次經(jīng)歷給她的孩子們帶來(lái)的變化（好的方面）。第二段開(kāi)頭

是：瑪格麗特寫(xiě)了這本她計(jì)劃好的書(shū)。本段應(yīng)該寫(xiě)這本書(shū)出版后引起了人們的興趣，以及貝

蒂?瑪格麗就這種生活方式向家長(zhǎng)提出建議。續(xù)寫(xiě)時(shí)要求使用5個(gè)以上短文中標(biāo)有下劃線的

關(guān)鍵詞語(yǔ)增加了寫(xiě)作難度，我們要熟悉所給劃線詞語(yǔ)，恰當(dāng)?shù)臅r(shí)候加以運(yùn)用.最后還要注意

所續(xù)寫(xiě)短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；續(xù)寫(xiě)完成后，請(qǐng)用下劃線標(biāo)出你所使用的關(guān)鍵詞語(yǔ)。按要

求完成寫(xiě)作任務(wù)。

4.【參考范文】

Para.1:

WhenIgotuptogetoffthebus,myschoolbagwasstuckinthearmrest.Ididn'tnoticeitand

stoodupwithallmystrength.Unfortunately,myschoolbagwastomapartandallthecontentsfell

ontheground.Ikneltdowntopickthemup.Suddenly,Isawahandpassingmesomeofthe

books.IlookedupandfounditwasEmilywhowashelpingme.Withherhelp,Iputallthe

contentsback,tomyschoolbag.Ibegantotalkwithherandwassurprisedtofindthatwehad

muchincommon.

Para.2:

IgotnoticedbyEmily,whobroughtmecouragetostartanewfriendship!OnedaywhenItold

herthatIadmiredherandhowIwishedtobeafriendofhers,shesaid,“Wehavealreadybeen

fidends."IfeltsohappythatIevensangasong.Hearingmysong,shethoughthighlyofitand

askedmetoteachhertosingit.ShemademerealizehowuniqueIwasandatlastIcameoutof

meshell.

【解析】

通過(guò)閱讀所給文章可知，作者跟隨父母來(lái)到了一個(gè)新城鎮(zhèn)，作為一名新生在學(xué)校的感覺(jué)