搞笑的英語小笑話

1、最新 料推薦搞笑的英語小笑話1： Expensive PriceDentist: Im sorry, madam, but Ill have to charge you twenty-five dollars for pulling your sons tooth.Mother: Twenty-five dollars! But I thought you only charged five dollars for an extraction.Dentist: I usually do. But your son yelled so loud, he scared four other pat

2、ients out of the office.昂貴的代價牙科醫(yī)生：對不起，夫人，為給您的兒子拔牙，我得收二十五美元。母親：二十五美元!可是我知道您拔一顆牙只要五美元呀?牙科醫(yī)生：是的。但是您兒子這么大聲地叫喚，他都嚇跑四位病人了搞笑的英語小笑話2：I Wasnt AsleepWhen a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, h

3、e nudged him and said: Wake up, sir!I wasnt asleep, the man answered.Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed.I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car.我沒有睡著當一群婦女上車之后，車上的座位全都被占滿了。售票員注意到一名男子好象是睡著了，他擔心這個人會坐過站，就用肘輕輕地碰了碰他，說： “先生，醒醒 ! ”“我沒有睡著。 ”那個男人回答?！皼]睡著 ?可是你眼睛都閉上了呀?”

4、“我知道，我只是不愿意看到在擁擠的車上有女士站在我身邊而已?！备阈Φ挠⒄Z小笑話3：The poor husbandYou cant imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife, the man complained to his friend. She asks me a question, then answers it herself, and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong.可憐的丈夫1最新 料推薦“你根本無法想

5、象和我妻子打交道是多么的難，”一個男人對他的朋友訴苦說，“她問我一個問題，然后自己回答了，過后又花半個小時跟我解釋為什么我的答案是錯的?！盬hos More Polite?A fat man and a skinny man were arguing about who was the more polite. The skinny man said he was more polite because he always tipped his hat to ladies. But the fat man knew he was more courteous because, whenever

6、 he got up and offered his seat, two ladies could sit down.誰更有禮貌 ?一個胖子和一個瘦子在爭論誰更有禮貌。瘦子說他更有禮貌，因為他經(jīng)常對女士摘帽示意。但是胖子認為他更有風度，因為無論什么時候他在車上給別人讓座時，總有兩位女士能坐下。搞笑的英語小笑話4：Let Dog in HotelA man wrote a letter to a small hotel he planned to visit on his vacation: I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He i

7、s well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, Ive been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, Ive never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures

8、 off the walls. Ive never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly. And Ive never had a dog run out on a hotel bill. Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel. And, if your dog will vouch for you, youre welcome to stay here, too.一個人給一家他計劃在假期里停留的小旅館寫了封信， “我非常希望帶

9、著我的狗，它很干凈很有教養(yǎng)，你能允許它和我睡一間屋子嗎 ?”旅館主人立即回了封信，“我經(jīng)營旅館很多年了，狗從沒偷過毛巾，床單，餐具，或者墻上的畫。我也從沒有在半夜因為狗喝醉胡鬧而趕走它，狗也從不不付帳就跑掉。實際上我們非常歡迎您的狗來我們旅館，如果它為您擔保，也歡迎您來。搞笑的英語小笑話5：Intelligent sonOne day, the father lets eight year-old son send a letter, the son took the letter , the father then remembered didnt write the address and

10、 addressees name on the envelope.After the son comes back, the father asks him: You have thrown the letter in the mail box?CertainlyYou have not seen on the envelope not to write the address and the addressee name?I certainly saw nothing written on the envelope.2最新 料推薦Then why you didnt take it back

11、?I also thought that you do not write the address and the addressee, is for does not want to let me know that you do send the letter to who!聰明的兒子有一天 ,父親讓八歲的兒子去寄一封信,兒子已經(jīng)拿著信跑了,父親才想起信封上沒寫地址和收信人的名字。兒子回來后 ,父親問他 : “你把信丟進郵筒了嗎?” 當“然 ”“你沒看見信封上沒有寫地址和收信人名字嗎?”“我當然看見信封上什么也沒寫”“那你為什么不拿回來呢?”“我還以為你不寫地址和收信人,是為了不想讓我知道

12、你把信寄給誰呢! ”搞笑的英語小笑話6：Put your feet inThe school girl was sitting with her feet streched far out into the aisle ,and was busily chewing gum, when the teacher espied her. Mary ! called the teacher sharply. Yes,Madam? questioned the pupil , Take that gum out of your mouth and put your feet in!把腳放進去一個女學生

13、坐在座位上，嘴里起勁地嚼著口香糖，腳卻伸到課桌間的走道里，被老師發(fā)現(xiàn)了。“瑪麗 ! ”老師嚴厲地叫她。 “什么事，老師 ?”這女學生問。 “把口香糖從嘴里拿出來，把腳放進去?！备阈Φ挠⒄Z小笑話7：I Wasnt AsleepWhen a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: Wake

14、 up, sir!I wasnt asleep, the man answered.Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed.I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car.我沒有睡著當一群婦女上車之后，車上的座位全都被占滿了。售票員注意到一名男子好象是睡著了，他擔心這個人會坐過站，就用肘輕輕地碰了碰他，說： “先生，醒醒 ! ”“我沒有睡著。 ”那個男人回答?！皼]睡著 ?可是你眼睛都閉上了呀?”3最新 料推薦“我知道，我只是不愿意看到在擁擠的車上有

15、女士站在我身邊而已?！备阈Φ挠⒄Z小笑話8：The poor husbandYou cant imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife, the man complained to his friend. She asks me a question, then answers it herself, and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong.可憐的丈夫“你根本無法想象和我妻子打交道是多么的難，”一個男人對他的朋友訴苦說

16、，“她問我一個問題，然后自己回答了，過后又花半個小時跟我解釋為什么我的答案是錯的?！备阈Φ挠⒄Z小笑話9：Where is the father?Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.Look, said the elder brother. How nice these paintings are!Yes, said the younger, but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children. Where is the father?Th

17、e elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, Obviously he was painting the pictures.父親在哪兒 ?兄弟倆在看一些漂亮的油畫?！翱?， ”哥哥說， “這些畫多漂亮呀! ”“是啊， ”弟弟說道， “可是在所有這些畫中，只有媽媽和孩子。那爸爸去哪兒了呢?”哥哥想了會兒，然后解釋道：“很明顯，他當時正在畫這些畫唄?！备阈Φ挠⒄Z小笑話10：Does the dog know the proverb, too?The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.Its all right