初三-一模高分作文沖刺-適合優(yōu)質生(學生版)

1、輔導教案學員編號：年級：初三課時數(shù)：3學員姓名：輔導科目：英語學科教師：課程主題：一模備考作文-高分策略學習目標授課時間：教學內容一模作文一、寫作評分標準作文評分標準按內容、語言、組織結構8+8+4的標準評分。內容：內容切題、充實、不寫廢話；意思連貫，表達清楚、準確、完整。語言：語言基本正確；用語規(guī)范、無或少見語法錯誤；拼寫、大小寫和標點正確。結構：詞匯和句型句式運用恰當自如；文中有值得肯定的好的句型和表達形式。中考作文打分的三個檔次和評分標準：A檔次的作文一般運用了較多的連接詞、短語、并列、倒裝、時間狀語從句、被動語態(tài)，審題合理、時態(tài)使用正確；字數(shù)符合要求；沒有大小寫、拼寫錯誤。得分在18-

2、20分B檔次的作文一般審題可以，有一定的過程描述，語言較流暢，敘述基本完全；復合句；時態(tài)基本正確。得分在16-18分C檔次的作文一般能夠使用不同的句子，大小寫、標點使用正確，會使用些連接詞。但語言上可能還需要更加豐富飽滿。得分在13-15二.寫作步驟思路和技巧近年來一模作文主要是記敘文，議論文，尤其夾敘夾議居多。寫作步驟：A審題認真審題，結構合理:1.寫什么(題目，參考問題）2.重點寫什么(提示問題）3.時態(tài)(參考問題）以2018年寶山區(qū)一模作文ArePiggyGoodforChildren為例子Usethefollowingpointsasaguide:Dochildrenstillneed

3、piggybanksnow?(一般現(xiàn)在時)Whatcanchildrenunderstandbysavingmoneyinthepiggybank?(重點)從這篇文章的題目，我們可以看出這是一篇議論文，首先我們可以確定題材，從兩個問題可以1看出時態(tài)以及寫作重點。（B）分題材（1）記敘文我們要積累一些描寫人和事的詞匯和句型。積累一些描繪人/事的形容詞和表達句型詞匯：對人的看法optimistic樂觀的able有才干的，能干的active主動的，活躍的bad-tempered脾氣暴燥的brave勇敢的careful辦事仔細的caring有同情心的cheerful開朗的childish幼稚的conf

4、ident有信心的considerate體貼的creative富創(chuàng)造力的dishonest不誠實的easy-going隨和的efficient有效率的energetic精力充沛的enthusiastic充滿熱情的faithful守信的，忠誠的friendly友好的gentle有禮貌的greedy貪婪的funny有趣的，古怪的hard-working勤勞的2humorous幽默的independent有主見的lazy懶惰的，懶散的mean吝嗇的modest謙虛的responsible負責的selfless無私的smart精明的strict嚴格的unselfish無私的nterestingbori

5、ng,對事的看法fundifficultRelaxingboringtiringexcitingamazingcharming有吸引力的deliciousdangeroussafeeasydifficultsmoothhardcutelovelyNecessaryImportant積累一些描繪人/事的形容詞和表達句型句型：Ithinkhesheitis+adj.,because賓語從句+原因狀語從句Ithinkhe/sheisaadj.personwhois.賓語從句+定語從句Ithinkitisadj.forus/sb.todo.,because.賓語從句+itis句型+原因狀語從句IfII

6、will.條件狀語從句Itmeansthat.(ifapersonis,hewill;)賓語從句+條件狀語從句3Iprefertodo,because.記敘文提綱模板I.交代是誰/什么事A：XXXistheestpersonthatIhaveevermet.WheneverIthinkabouthim,IcannotbutfeelB：doingistheestthingthatIhaveeverdone/itssinceIdidsth.However,IwillforgetthemomentsthatIspendwithXXXII.交代經(jīng)過。Itwason.,III.經(jīng)驗總結/感想/名言Acc

7、ordingtomypersonalexperience,Icompletelyunderstandthemeaningofthefamoussaying:“.”Afterthat,Ilearntthat（2）議論文建議類議論文模板第一段觀點：Ithinkitisadj.(necessary/important/)todosth./Ithinksth./doingsth.isadj.(necessary/important/).To(solvethisproblem)Ihave3suggestions.第二段建議：Firstofall,itsagoodchoicetodoWhatsmore,w

8、e/youdbetterdoinsteadofdoingLastbutnotleast,we/youaresupposedtodo第三段總結：A:Onlyinthisway,canweB:Followmyadvice,Iamsureyou/wewill以這篇作文為例，我們來分析一下Topic：Pressureonstudentsisincreasingandtheyarepushedtohardworkintheirstudies.Doyouthinkthisisgoodorbadtostudents?現(xiàn)如今學生的壓力越來越大，你認為這是一個好現(xiàn)象嗎？例文：認為是一個好現(xiàn)象Studentsto

9、dayexperiencemorestressatschoolandhavetostartworkinghardatayoungage.Ithinkthisisapositivetrend.Tobeginwith,youngstudentshavebettermemories.Wecangainalargeamountofbasicknowledgeifweconcentrateonourstudies.Theknowledgebasethatwebuildduringthistimecanhelpuswithgainingmoreadvancedknowledge.Besides,stres

10、salsohelpyoungstudentsgetintobetterstudyhabits.Studyinghardandtryingtoachievegoodmarksinexaminationswillhelpusbecomemoreorganized,andmanageourtimemoreefficiently.Thesewillbeessentialhabitsandskillsforourfuture,andevenalifetimelearning.（認為壓力過大不是一個好現(xiàn)象4Thereisnodoubtthattoomuchstressisnotbeneficialtost

11、udents.Studentsmayfindithardforthemtofocusontheirstudiesortothinkclearlyiftheyareundertoomuchstress.Whatsmore,toomuchstressmaydoharmtonotonlytostudentsphysicalhealthbutalsotomentalhealth.Itsresearchedthatplentyofillnesssuchasbeingshortorbeingsensitivearebothduetohavingtoomuchstress.Parentsandteacher

12、sshouldcommunicatewiththemregularlytohelpthemcopewithstress.Also,schoolsshouldprovidestudentswithinterestingafter-schoolactivitiestohelpthemreducestress.Ibelievethatstudentscanachievemuchbetterresultsiftheydonthavetoomuchstress.NewWords：1、Concentrateon【拓展】：focusonpayattentionto把注意力放在上devoteoneselfin

13、to（全身心投入）2、advancedknowledge3、getintobetterhabits4、organized5、efficiently6、essential7、Thereisnodoubtthat.【拓展】：UndoubtedlyWithoutadoubtCertainlyThereisnodenyingthefactthatThisisbeyondallquestionsthatItissureenough8、bebeneficialto【拓展】：DogoodtoBehelpfultoGetadvantagefrom（從中獲得好更高端的知識養(yǎng)成更加良好的習慣a.有組織的adv.有

14、效率地a.必要的毫無疑問的是對有好處、益處5處）Havepositiveinfluenceon9、understress/pressure10、Itseemsthat.11、regularly12、copewith【拓展】：dealwithDowithSolvetheproblemof.13、reducestress14、Ibelievethat【拓展】Ithink我認為AsfarasIamconcernedInmyopinionFrommyperspective處于壓力之下似乎、好像adv.定期地、有規(guī)律地應對、解決減少壓力我認為（比較堅定的認為）FrommypointofviewItsee

15、mstomethat.TomywayofthinkingIfyouaskme,.Sentences:1、Studyinghardandtryingtoachievegoodmarksinexaminationswillhelpusbecomemoreorganized,andmanageourtimemoreefficiently.努力學習并爭取良好的考試成績讓我們變得更有條理，能更好的管理時間及控制能力。（使用非謂語做開頭比用單純的“I”開頭要好得多，例如，這個句子原本是：Wewillstudyhardandtrytoachievegoodmarksinexamination.Andthes

16、ewillmakeusorganized,andmakeourtimemoreefficient.兩兩對比就會發(fā)現(xiàn)，原文中的句子會比較容易拿高分。）62、Parentsandteachersshouldcommunicatewiththemregularlytohelpthemcopewithstress.Also,schoolsshouldprovidestudentswithinterestingafter-schoolactivitiestohelpthemreducestress.家長可以通過經(jīng)常與孩子交流來幫助學生減壓。并且，學校也應該向學生提供有趣的課外活動來幫助他們減緩壓力與焦慮

17、。（在提意見的時候，要注意，一定要具體一點，不要只喊口號，不要只說老師和學校可以幫助，一定要寫上如何幫助，這樣才會是一篇合格的議論文。）練一練_C）書面表達高分策略之-:高級詞匯依據(jù)中考英語書面表達評分細則,是否應用了較多的語法結構和詞匯及較高級詞匯是衡量一篇書面表達“具備較強的語言運用能力的重要標志之一。這里所說的“高級詞匯”，指的是大綱中沒有列入或沒有識記要求,但在實際運用中卻出現(xiàn)比較頻繁且符合英美國家習慣的表達方式的詞匯，比如frustration,awkward,awfully,concern等詞，都可以算作是“高級詞匯”。考生若能夠適當?shù)剡\用一些高級詞匯，定會給評卷老師留下深刻的印象

18、。1.使用動詞(短語)7Astrongstormhappenedinourcitylastnight.(一般)Astrongstormhit/struckourcitylastnight.(高級)SuddenlyIthoughtoutagoodidea.(般)Agoodideasuddenlystruckme.(高級)Aftertheoperation,hefeltbetterandbetter.(一般)Hewasrecoveringaftertheoperation.(高級)Asaresulttheplanwasafailure.(一般)Theplanturnedouttobeafailur

19、e.(高級)Youcanfindmyhouseeasily.(-般)Youllhavenotroublefindingmyhouse.(高級)Inourteam,therearetwenty-sixplayers.(一般)Ourteamismadeupof/consistsoftwenty-sixplayers.(高級)Toachievesuccess,weshoulduseeverypossiblechance.(一般)Toachievesuccess,weshouldtakeadvantageofeverypossiblechance.(高級)Earlyinthemorning,wewen

20、t10thesuburbstoplanttreesbybike.(一般)Earlyinthemorning,webicycledtothesuburbstoplanttrees.(高級)Wefeelitsourdutytoprotectandmakeourenvironmentbeautiful.(一般)Wefeelitsourdutytoprotectandbeautifyourenvironment.(高級)Onourwaytoschool,Isawalotofillegalandunsafebehaviors.(一般)Onourwaytoschool,Iwitnessedalotofil

21、legalandunsafebehaviors.（高級）TenstudentswillgivetheirspeechonthegiventopicManandNature.(一般)Tenstudentswilldelivertheirspeechesonthegiventopic“ManandNature.(高級)IstudiedChinese,Math,English,chemistryandcomputeratschool.(一般)ThesubjectsIstudiedatschoolincludedChinese,Math,English,chemistryandcomputer.(高級

22、)Immediateactionsshouldbetaken,likenotcuttingdowntrees,toimprovetheenvironment.(一般)8Immediateactionsshouldbetaken,likestoppingcuttingdowntrees,tobettertheenvironment.（高級）2.使用復雜名詞(短語)TheapplicantshouldspeakChinesewell.(一般)FluencyinChineseispreferred.(高級)Seeingthemonthebus,Ifeltverysatisfied.(一般)Seein

23、gthemonthebus,Ifeltasenseofsatisfaction.(高級)TheapplicantshouldcomefromUSAorBritain.(一般)TheapplicantshouldbeanativespeakerofEnglish.(高級)IhopethattheEnglishspeechcompetitionwillsucceed!(一般)IhopethattheEnglishspeechcompetitionwillbeagreatsuccess!(高級)3.使用形容詞(短語)Thestudentsthereneedntpayfortheirbooks.(一般

24、)Booksarefreeforthestudentsthere.(高級)Atweekends,wehavealotofhomeworktodo.(一般)Atweekends,wehaveendlesshomeworktodo.(高級)Thebathroomandthekitchenareverygood.(-般)Thebathroomandthekitchenarewell-furnished.(高級)Weallmissyouandthankyouforwhatyoudidforus.(一般)Weallmissyouandareverygratefulforwhatyoudidforus.(

25、高級)Amazedathowskillfultheywere,Iwantedtobejustasgood.(-般)Amazedathowskillfultheywere,Iwasdeterminedtbejustasgood.(高級)4.使用副司(短語)9PeoplecelebrateEarthDayindifferentways.(一般)PeoplecelebrateEarthDaydifferently.(高級)Wemustlearntohandleconflictsthybeingcalmandwise.(一般)Wemustlearntohandleconflictscalmlyandw

26、isely.(高級)Idbeveryhappytohelpifyouhaveanyquestions.(一般)Idbemorethanhappytohelpifyouhaveanyquestions.(高級)ThenIoftenwatchedthemcarefullytolearntheirtechniques.(般)Lateron,Ioftenwatchedthemcarefullytolearntheirtechniques,(高級)IfallvisitorstotheFairyLakeParkdoasthecoupledid,thelakewillbeverypollute（一般)Ifa

27、llvisitorstotheFairyLakePakdothecoupledid,thelakewillbeseverelypolluted(高級)5.使用介詞(短語)Anewrailwayisbeingbuiltinmyhometown,(一般)Anewrailwayisunderconstructioninmyhometown.(高級)Someofmyclassmatessupportthemovie.(一般)Someofmyclassmatesareinfavorofthemovie.(高級)Becausetheweatherwasgood,ourjourneywascomfortab

28、le.(一般)Thankstothegoodweather,ourjourneywascomfortable.(高級)Whensheheardhehaddied,shewentpalewithsorrow.(一般)Atthenewsofhisdeath,shewentpalewithsorrow.(高級)ShewenttoAustriatostudymusic.(一般)ShewenttoAustriawiththepurposeofstudyingmusic.(高級)Ifmyteacherhadntencouragedme,Icouldnthavewonthefirstprize.(一般)Bu

29、tformyteachersencouragementIcouldhavewonthefirstprize.(高級)10書面表達高分策略之二:復雜結構依據(jù)中考英語書面表達評分細則，是否使用較復雜結構是衡量篇書面表達“具備較強的語言運用能力”的重要標志之一要提高語言表達的檔次，在復雜結構上就不能一味地使用簡單句和陳述句，而應該根據(jù)實際情況靈活運用所學的各種結構。正如在綠黃場上，既要有長傳沖畫，又要有短傳滲透下底傳中中路包抄只有這樣豐富的戰(zhàn)術才能擒敵制勝。同樣，復雜結構有助于號生在高考中出類拔萃.贏得高分。1改變時態(tài)Thebellisringingnow.(一般)Theregoesthebell.

30、(高級)Thecompetitionisheldinourschoolonceayear.(一般)Thisannualeventhasbeenheldinourschoolforyears.(高級)2.改變語態(tài)Peoplesuggestthattheconferencebeputoff.(一般)Itissuggestedthattheconferencebeputoff.(高級)ThetwopicturestellusdifferentpeoplecelebrateEarthDayindifferentways.(一般)Ascanbeseenfromthetwopictures,differe

31、ntpeoplecelebrateEarthDayindifferentways.(高級)3.使用不定式Ihurriedtoschoolbybikeandfoundthegatewaslocked.(一般)Ihurriedtoschoolbybike,onlytofindthegatelocked.(高級)Itisreportedthathislatestnovelhasbeentranslatedintoseveralforeignlanguages.(一般)Hislatestnovelisreportedtohavebeentranslatedintoseveralforeignlangu

32、ages.(高級)4.使用過去分詞Shewalkedoutoftheroomandmanystudentsfollowedher.(一般)Followedbymanystudents,shewalkedoutoftheroom.(高級)Onceitisseen,itcanneverbeforgotten.(一般)Onceseen,itcanneverbeforgotten.(高級)5.使用動名詞Whenwearrivedatthefarm,wewerewarmlywelcomed.(一般)11Onourarrivingatthefarm,wewerewarmlywelcomed.(高級)The

33、driverescapedanddidntstop;helefttheoldmanlyingontheroad.(一般)Thedriverescapedwithoutstopping,leavingtheoldmanlyingontheroad.(高級)6.使用現(xiàn)在分詞Afterhehadfinishedhishomework,hewenthome.(一般)Havingfinishedhishomework,hewenthome.(高級)Thestudentsheadedfortheirdestinationbybus.Theyweretalkingandlaughingalltheway.(

34、一般)Thestudentsheadedfortheirdestinationbybus,talkingandlaughingalltheway.(高級)7.使用名詞性從句Hedidntturnup.Itdisappointedeverybody.(一般)Thefactthathedidntturnupdisappointedeverybody.(高級)Thelittlegirlknowssomanythings,itisreallysurprising.(一般)Whatmakesmesurprisedisthatthelittlegirlknowssomanythings.(高級)8.使用狀

35、語從句Iwontbelievewhathesays.(一般)Nomatterwhathesays,Iwontbelieve.(高級)Whenhespoke,hefeltmoreandmoreexcited(般)Themorehespoke,themoreexcitedhefelt.(高級)9.使用定語從句Thegirlisspokenhighlyof.Hercompositionwaswellwritten.(一般)Thegirlwhosecompositionwaswellwrittenwasspokenhighlyof.(高級)Duringthetripsomestudentstoldfu

36、nnyjokes.Thejokesmadetheothersveryhappy.(一般)Duringthetripsomestudentstoldfunnyjokes,whichmadetheothersveyhappy(高級)10.使用虛擬語氣Theshipdidntsinkbecausethereweretheeffortsofthecaptain(一般)Butfortheeffortsofthecaptain,theshipwouldhavesunk.(高級)Iwasntinvitedtotheparty,soIdidntattendit(一般)IfIhadbeeninvitedtoth

37、eparty,Iwouldhaveattendedit.(高級)11.使用倒裝句12Morethan300shopsarealongthis800-metrelongstreet(一般)Alongthis800meterlongstreetaremorethan300shops.(高級)Wecanhaveenoughenergytostudybetteronlyinthisway.(一般)Onlyinthiswaycanwehaveenoughenergytostudybetter.(高級)12.使用介詞短語Itwassnowingheavily,buttheworkerswentonwith

38、thework.(一般)Inspiteoftheheavysnow,theworkerswentonwiththework.(高級)Hedoesntgiveusanswersimmediately.Heencouragesustothinkbyourselves.(一般)Insteadofgivingusanswersimmediately,heencouragesustothinkbyourselves.(高級)13.使用with復合結構Theelderlyladygotonthetrainandcarriedaheavybaginherhand.(一般)Theelderlyladygoto

39、nthetrain,withaheavybaginherhand.(高級)Therewasonly30minutestogobeforethetrainleft.Ihadtotakeataxitothestation(一般)Withonly30minutestogobeforethetrainleft,Ihadtotakeataxitothestation.(高級)14.使用獨立主格結構Iftheweatherpermits,Illcometomorrow.(一般)Weatherpermitting,Illcometomorrow.(高級)Aftertheyhaddoneeverything,

40、theysatintheyardchattingwiththeelderlypeople(一般)Everythingdone,theysatintheyardchattingwiththeelderlypeople(高級)15.使用感嘆句Weweregladtobethecropsandvegetablesgrowingverywell.(一般)Howgladweweretoseethecropandvegetablesgrowingverywell(高級)Heleadsustoawonderfulworldofwhy,(一般)Whatawonderfulworldof“whyheleadsu

41、sto!(高級)16.使用強調句OurAhFuhadsavedmylittlesisterbravely.(一般)ItwasourAhFuwhohadsavedmylittlesisterbravely.(高級)Hedidnotknowwhathadhappeneduntilhehadreadthenewsinthenewspaper.(一般)Itwasnotuntilhehadreadthenewsinthenewspaperthatheknewwhathadhappened.(高級)17.狀語前置Thegirlsfelttiredbuthappy.Theyrodebikestothesch

42、ool.(一般)13Tiredbuthappy,thegirlsrodebikestotheschool.(高級)Wemetattheschoolgateandwenttheretogetherearlyinthemorning.(一般)Earlyinthemorning,wemetattheschoolgateandwenttheretogether.(高級)18.使用同位語TheMid-AutumnFestivalisatraditionalbutcolorfulfestival.(一般)SuchistheMid-AutumnFestival,atraditionalbutcolorful

43、festival.(高級)19.使用諺語Thestorytellsusyoushoulddomoreandtalkless.(一般)Asthesayinggoes,Actionsspeaklouderthanwords.”(高級)20.使用祈使句Ifyougothroughthegate,youllfindtheentrancetoBearCountry.(一般)GothroughthegateandyouwillfindtheentrancetoBearCountry.(高級)鞏固訓練請綜合運用上述復雜結構把下列句子“合寫”“成語法正確、意義完整結構復雜的句子:1.Itsaflatof25s

44、quaremeters.Thereisabedroomintheflat.Thereisabathroomandakitcheninit,too.Inthebathroom,thereisabed;thereisasofa,adeskandachairaswell.2.Wehadashortrest.Thenwebegantoplayhappily.Wesanganddanced.Sometoldjokes.Someplayedchess.書面表達高分策略之三:有效連接依據(jù)中考英語書面表達評分細則，是否“有效地使用了語句間的連接成分,使全文結構緊湊是衡量.一篇書面表達的重要標準之一。語句間的連

45、接成分包括過渡性詞語、過渡句等。過渡詞猶如“橋梁”和“黏合劑”，在敘述和論述過程中,恰當?shù)厥褂眠^渡詞以避免結構松散,層次不明,表意不清等弊端，使文章條理清楚,文字連貫流暢。使用語句間的連接成分可使語言的連貫性得以實現(xiàn)，從而使文章過渡自然、結構嚴謹富于邏輯更具說服力。請欣賞揣摩中考英語書面表達范文中如何使用過渡性詞語,使全文結構更緊湊:1.遞進型標志詞:besides，whatsmore，letalone,worsestill,moreover,even,furthermoreBesides,Ienjoyedthefriendlyatmosphereinclass.14Whatsmore,the

46、yspatandeventhrewrubbishintothelake.Whatsmore,weshouldanalyzethereasonoffailuretogetsuccessforthenexttime.2.解釋型標志詞:thatis(tosay)，inotherwords.Inotherwords,wearethemasterofourfuture.3.轉折型標志詞:however,but,yet,althoughotherwise,instead,onthecontrary.Aperfectresultispleasing,butenjoyingtheprocessisalsoat

47、tractive.However，itissoeasyforpeopletorealizetheirdreamseverytime.4.列舉型標志詞:firstlysecondlyfinallyontheonehand，ontheotherhandFirstandforemost,IwoulddoaparttimejobsothatIcangainsomeworkexperienceaswellassomepocketmoney!Ontheonehand,wethinkthatfriendshipcomesfirst,andmatchcomessecond.Ontheotherhand,sincewealltriedourbest,wehadnoregret5.舉例型標志詞:forexample，forinstance,suchas,th